Of course she’s not happy with her appearance, she knows that she’s abusing her her youth. She gets all burned up when people call her my mum’s younger sister or take time grasp that actually she’s our sister not khala or mami or a 17/19 year old teen calls her aunty. The sad bit is, she’s only in her late 20’s yet looks like a someone above her mid 30’s.
Her being so self obsessed and shallow to actually respect or consider good intention behind the advice of her loved one, doesn’t make her look like a some sort of beloved victim nor it’ll earn her respect. In fact these are exactly the type of people you yourself must ‘ignore’, forget about them ignoring you. They simply don’t worth it.
I know that weight comments can be highly annoying and damaging to self esteem, I’ve been through all that. I’d always feel pretty insulted when people would say ‘oh you are so skinny, don’t you eat or something’ whereas I’ll feel pretty complimented when my mum or friends will say ‘you know you should gain some tiny bit of weight, it’ll so suit you…you’ll look really good, try eating xyz, try doing that etc etc’. Thanks to those people, I started paying attention to myself and my eating habits, and I feel good about myself. I don’t see how I could’ve possibly helped myself by this pathetic ‘how dare you’ attitude.
Diwana, I think I know why people dont like you now.
I think its because you dont know how to properly communicate your ideas in a way where they actually sound reasonable. You’re one of those people who “says it like it is” but does not believe in tact or manners because you’re too lazy to be bothered with them. Just because you believe something to be true does not give you the license to commit what I refer to as “Verbal Diarrhea”.
There is no excuse for lack of tact. If you fix the way you approach people, Im sure they will be more than happy to talk to you. Unfortunately, you have communication problems and thats the reason many women find your posts repulsive, annoying and…almost…archaic in quality.
Thanks for the advice Reha, your own post is not showing ‘tact’ either unfortunately. Please show me any of my post where I called names or use insulting remarks. All too often it is showed by some posters. As anyone can see, I have dealt with those remarks very politely or as you say tactfully.
I understand and felt a little bad writing this too but it had to be done. Im sure you mean well and are just trying to help but how would you know you’re being tactless if we dont tell you? It just helps in getting your point across.
Much like how you tell all these women they’re all fat and have no excuse to be fat…how else would they know these things?
I don’t know what universe you live in or what goes on in that thick head of yours that makes you think you can be an expert on pregnancy when you’ve never been pregnant or given birth nor will you ever. So just quit it with your sleazy and misogynistic verbal diarrhea already.
I think i can understand your feelings- not that i am trying to lose any baby fats but someone close to me is very much stressed about this.
before her in laws nd husband wanted a baby.. and she was all skinny and healthy and now after giving birth to a Healthy Baby Boy, she got all the fat in her Body. and its not getting off easily.
and i always say 1 thing to her " .. pure 9 maheene lagye they yeh sab charne mein abhi itna time toh lage ga na is ko utrane mein" … just dont give up. keep trying and dont even think about trying any stupid diets or tricks. just be healthy for your baby and your family <3
No! The fact that one is not fitting into one’s wedding clothes is nothing but rot!! This is Pakistani mentality thinking that they and only they can know what’s best for others, the country, Islam and the world! Guess what you are wrong. Its one thing if someone is 300 lbs or something (but then too only if you are close and teh choice of words is sensitive )but not otherwise !
Yes, but a normal person knows themselves what is good for them and what they should do. Doctors in the West use very good choice of words if they want to tell people to lose weight but not most desi ones. Ditto for people around you, everyone knows what’;s best for you but if you give them unsolicited advice then they tell you off. I never comment on anyone’s appreance unless they ask for my advice specifically and then too my choiceof words is not offensive. BTW 300 lbs is what is defined as clinical obesity even though you can be termed obese even if you are way less. Besides, its just plain rude. The person who can look out for yourself the best is you yourself. Even if you are the fattest person on earth, its no one’s business!
