the worst is when they serve dinner. its utter chaos - no proper lines, pple budding into lines, piling on food like it was their last meal, piling their kids' plates so their stomachs could be full for the remainder of the week so they wont have to cook and them coming back to the tables and taking everyone's seat around them for their kids, their neices, their nephews, their jetani, their devrani and their saas.
This is why i eat before i go to a wedding...cant take it.
hate hate hate it when some women come up to the bride and start touching your jewellery....
Another hate thing I came across at my SIL's wedding in pak....some ppl from my inlaws had the audacity to ask me (the bahu) if what my SIL was wearing was real or not... I was like WTH ..... ask them or you know what don't ask at all....
Hate this thing of the family of the bride getting upset on the rukhsati function.... we didn't get the protocol.... (what is that btw) ....u were too busy tending to the groom's family ...heck yeah.... they are our guests.... u should be with us when we are welcoming them and showing them some respect.... Why can't we ever have weddings with no drama.... its like drama makes a wedding memorable for them...
I hate the waiting… like have you ever been to a shaadi that has started on time??? There is only so much mingling and “oohing and aaahing” over each other clothing and jewelry one can take. Most shaadi’s I’v gone too don’t even have “cocktail” hour so there are not even any snacks and such. You are just sitting there…waiting for things to start… making small talk. Worse is when you are sitting at a table full of stranger…or ppl you dont like. (aka Roxx’s “Den of Vipers” lol). If the invitation says 6pm …the bride and groom should not be arriving at 7:30pm
But what I find EVEN MORE annoying are guests that come super late. I find it very ridiculously rude… especially since most desi weddings start late anyways… so what is their excuse??? Its like they know what time the food is going to be served and show up right on time to be the first in line to chow down.
hate hate hate it when some women come up to the bride and start touching your jewellery....
Another hate thing I came across at my SIL's wedding in pak....some ppl from my inlaws had the audacity to ask me (the bahu) if what my SIL was wearing was real or not... I was like WTH ..... ask them or you know what don't ask at all....
Hate this thing of the family of the bride getting upset on the rukhsati function.... we didn't get the protocol.... (what is that btw) ....u were too busy tending to the groom's family ...heck yeah.... they are our guests.... u should be with us when we are welcoming them and showing them some respect.... Why can't we ever have weddings with no drama.... its like drama makes a wedding memorable for them...
To be fair: "drama" is what "makes a wedding memorable for" us ALL. It's what this whole thread is about, really.
I can't stand the whole, 'come pose with us on the stage' drama.
Recent 'family' weddings have proved how pathetically laughable it all is.
One of the aunts didnt get to stand next to her husband as she was standing on the stage, photographer REFUSED to retake picture, brides dad had to REMOVE aunt from stage.
Makes great entertainment for Milly, not so nice for bride.
but how do u know that it only happens at the pakistani weddings? ....... i have seen gora ppl running for free food much more then desi ppl....... free food, free stuff.... no wonder there are special sales going on all year round......
just coz they are non-desi and goras doesnt mean they are all so well organized.....
^ U make a good point. But at all the goray weddings I have been too (and there are a LOT… i know way more goray than desis due to where I grew up) … no matter how unorganized and/cheap the wedding was … it was still never buffet style. It is always sit down and you get served. It is a whole other story that most of the time, the food is crappy. But due to the non-buffet use …there is no madd rush (or stampede as i like to call it) towards food.
But yea… at any other event OTHER than weddings…goray definitely flock to anywhere that says “Free food”…
I hope we follow England’s example and it became more common here in America for Desi to have sit down dinners… it definitely is alot classier in my opinion :hinna:
But for this to happen… our venues have to be more accomodating for serving desi food. Most places here you only have 2 options: 1) sit down dinner… gora food or 2) desi food … buffet style. *MOST *Places here don’t have the option to have desi food and so you have to bring it in from somewhere else (if you can) …and if you do this, venues dont take the responsibility of serving it because they say they don’t know “how” to serve it.
in our weddings.... the sit down, serve u situation doesnt work..... coz its Sunnah of Hazoor (P.B.U.H) to taste/eat little of everything the host has served..... so when they go to try everything in little.... the plate is heaped!! ..... menu cards dont work that well...... plus i dont think desi halls serve it that way...... not sure coz no on in my family is married.
yupp..... they even drink coffee in the bank for no reason..... just coz it doesnt have a cost!!!
all the desi weddings I have gone to ..... I have never seen any rush to food... ppl actually wait in line for their turn. there is no rush anywhere.... there is no one dancing on the stage either.... its never crowded. i have yet to see a crowded stage wedding!!!
in our weddings.... the sit down, serve u situation doesnt work..... coz its Sunnah of Hazoor (P.B.U.H) to taste/eat little of everything the host has served.....
i dont get this bit. in the weddings ive been to regarding sit down dinners everyone is always served the same platters of food so basically they are still tasting/eating a little of everything the host has served except they are sitting down instead of waiting in line for ages
^ @ Subbo: U are very lucky :) Seems like you belong to a great community. Behaviors are def. different everywhere.
But I agree with Lipstick. You don't need a buffet to observe Sunnah. In a sit down situation, you just get a plate of food served to you that has everything that the host is serving. Or they bring smaller platters of ALL the dishes and place them on your table so that the guests can serve themselves without getting up. Waiters come along to refill these platters. Its very elegant and classy.
but how do u know that it only happens at the pakistani weddings? .......** i have seen gora ppl running for free food much more then desi ppl....... free food, free stuff.... **no wonder there are special sales going on all year round......
just coz they are non-desi and goras doesnt mean they are all so well organized.....
True, but the difference is that westerners tend to refrain from that kind behavior at others' weddings.
We need to introduce your goray friends to the joys of "Shagufta’s Kabab House and Indo-Pak Buffet”: five will get you ten, they’ll be stampeding with the best of us!
Everyone flocks anywhere there is “free food”! “If it’s for free, it’s for me!” (family motto).
I just hope we follow England’s example and respect the buffet queue, because I can’t take another elbow to ribcage!
Given what you aptly noted, the only way our venues could be more accommodating in serving Desi food is if they left it in giant troughs. End of story.
in our weddings.... the sit down, serve u situation doesnt work..... coz its Sunnah of Hazoor (P.B.U.H) to taste/eat little of everything the host has served..... so when they go to try everything in little.... the plate is heaped!! ..... menu cards dont work that well...... plus i dont think desi halls serve it that way...... not sure coz no on in my family is married.
Consider yourself blessed: at the weddings I attend, you'd think it was Sunnah to waste a "little of everything the host has served"; people kick and push each other for the right to pile their plates up with food that largely goes untouched.
yupp..... they even drink coffee in the bank for no reason..... just coz it doesnt have a cost!!!
Sweetie, everyone does that when confronted with free coffee (even if they're allergic to caffeine)!
all the desi weddings I have gone to ..... I have never seen any rush to food... ppl actually wait in line for their turn. there is no rush anywhere.... there is no one dancing on the stage either.... its never crowded. i have yet to see a crowded stage wedding!!!
Seriously, can we switch our summer social calenders? I'd like to get through one wedding where I'm not being poked in the back with a plate because some aunty thinks the buffet line's not moving fast enough. Same with the stage thing: I'd like to go to one wedding where I'm not expected to jump onstage and have my picture taken with the bride, like she's some national landmark. Lucky!
I can't stand the whole, 'come pose with us on the stage' drama.
Recent 'family' weddings have proved how pathetically laughable it all is.
One of the aunts didnt get to stand next to her husband as she was standing on the stage, photographer REFUSED to retake picture, brides dad had to REMOVE aunt from stage.
Makes great entertainment for Milly, not so nice for bride.
Neither can I, to be honest. I don't understand the point of having your picture taken with the bride; it's not like she's a foreign dignitary or a 12 lb. Bass!
I think one of the rudest things I've ever seen is invitations that specify "no boxed gifts". Demanding cash is always in poor taste.
I've been to several Pakistani weddings in the US with plated dinners...I'm certainly not going to have a buffet at my wedding. Personally I'd much rather have a nice fillet mignon than fight a bunch of aunties and uncles in line for some caterer's cold, greasy biryani and butter chicken.
I think one of the rudest things I've ever seen is invitations that specify "no boxed gifts".Demanding cash is always in poor taste.
Agreed. If you MUST rob your wedding guests, use a gun instead of paper.
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I'd rather have a smaller reception with fewer guests than demand cash of them, outright.
I've been to several Pakistani weddings in the US with plated dinners...I*'m certainly not going to have a buffet at my wedding. Personally I'd much rather have a nice fillet mignon than fight a bunch of aunties* and uncles** in line for some caterer's cold, greasy biryani and butter chicken.**
Especially given that most of 'em are willing to fight you to the death.
I have a funny/gross story. I went to a wedding last year. When appetizers were served, there was a lady who PILED her plate very high, and another for her 2 year old daughter. She followed her 2 year old daughter all around the hall, stuffing her face with food. Finally the little girl walked up onto the stage, right infront of the chairs for the Bride and Groom (neither of them were sitting there yet), and the mom kept stuffing her mouth, when all of a sudden the little girl started to throw up all over the stage! It was like a fountain, it wouldnt stop! All the mother did, was take her napkin and place it over the vomit on the stage, picked up her daughter and went back to her seat. No one even bothered to clean up the vomit, and the bride and groom ended up sitting on a vomit covered stage! Their marriage ended in divorce....but I dont think that had anything to do with the vomit, but you can never be sure!
there was actually one wedding where the girls tried to do the shoe stealing thing and groom actually became furious and made a scene demanding his shoe back and ridiculed them for even thinking he might give them money. it was really weird and just messed up the entire mood of the wedding..
Wow, sounds like he'll make an amazing husband ;-)!
I have a funny/gross story. I went to a wedding last year. When appetizers were served, there was a lady who PILED her plate very high, and another for her 2 year old daughter. She followed her 2 year old daughter all around the hall, stuffing her face with food. Finally the little girl walked up onto the stage, right infront of the chairs for the Bride and Groom (neither of them were sitting there yet), and the mom kept stuffing her mouth, when all of a sudden the little girl started to throw up all over the stage! It was like a fountain, it wouldnt stop! All the mother did, was take her napkin and place it over the vomit on the stage, picked up her daughter and went back to her seat. No one even bothered to clean up the vomit, and the bride and groom ended up sitting on a vomit covered stage! Their marriage ended in divorce....but I dont think that had anything to do with the vomit, but you can never be sure!
EWWWW!!! If I was the bride I would have
A) demanded to have the vomit cleaned up at once
B) Embarassed the hell out of the woman by making loud comments about how overstuffing on free food is dangerous to children's health
C) Made sure she and her family were somehow 'persuaded' to leave the venue ASAP!
