I have been thinking of this lately. what is good parenting? when a mother is there for the baby all the time or when the mother takes out a little time for herself as well as taking care of the baby?
In my case I have literally been overwhelmed since my baby boy was born. In almost 9 months now I have been trying to find the right balance between covering his needs and also taking care of my own needs. Result is that my own needs for health and fitness activites havent been prioritized but I have done some brainstorm in establishing my own company and been networking with key people to conduct this work. In all this my baby boy have been with me for most of the sessions I attended though my father in law went with us and took care of him when I couldnt be with him…
So in one way I have suceeded in focusing on my own business goals but failed to do any fitness activities as its just not been on the top of my mind…I have lost 11 kg of the 15 kg I gained and my goal was to get rid of all 15 kg before 1st of March.
In all this, my baby has been my main focus. Feeding him, changing diapers and looking after him, making sure that his environment is safe, he gets enough sleep, he gets fresh air and stimulations. But I dont know why I am feeling like I am a bad mother?! I am not doing much to teach him stuff, but is he too young for that being only 8 and half months old? Being an ambitious person myself I might have high expectations to my baby that he needs to learns stuff that young…?!
how much time should you spend with your baby as a mother who is at home?
I need some space for myself. I have always been like that and it was a tough one when he was born and I didnt get any time off. I spend some time online to read stuff for myself but ALL the time I am sitting with my laptop and he is playing in his toys corner, I feel bad and guilty that I should be sitting with him and playing with him…do you play with your baby/kid all the time or leave them for themselves once in a while? and what do you feel about it?
can you leave your baby to watch cartoons on TV and do some homework or is it big no no for you guys?
For me it was a big NO NO before I ad my baby boy but the elder he got and being with him all the day I got tired and had to do chores at home so I ended up turning on TV for him so he watched cartoons max an hour day…I feel bad about it but still thats the time I have some quietness from my hyperactive boy. he is soon 9 months.
So what are your thoughts on what good parenting is and must be about, how is a good mother like and how much time should a baby spend on its own with his/her toys while the mother can do her own stuff??
Good parenting starts with having a child ONLY when you are ready for the responsibility! Otherwise not only yours but more so the child’s life become a hell. Nobody should have kids to be taken care of by the maids :nono:. If you plan to have them, you might as well be ready to take care of them YOURSELF. Getting help is not an issue but having your kids being feed, bathed and brought up by others is in my opinion.
Why do we need to label what good parenting is? Parenting is one of the most trickest responsibilities one can do. There is no handbook. What is best for one parent(s) is not going to be the best for other parents. You do what you have to do.
Why do we need to label what good parenting is? Parenting is one of the most trickest responsibilities one can do. There is no handbook. What is best for one parent(s) is not going to be the best for other parents. You do what you have to do.
ZK, really, come on.
Well that was my opinion and if anyone disagrees or disaproves its ok. But i believe after you have kids you can't think anymore about what's best for you, it has to be what is best for the family (which includes you too, just not only you).
i think its never easy with tiny babies who need a lot of attention when they are awake. if you have a supportive spouse, this gets a little easier to make "me time". i think most hubbies will comply once they understand how letting you be in a happy mood and bonding with the kid helps everybody out too.
as for letting the kid play alone for a while etc, as long as they are safe and happy, i don't see the issue. tv.. i'm not so sure, for me its the last resort.
its only gonna get easier once they start walking, and interacting with other kids etc. you are thru with the most difficult parts. i think..
Well that was my opinion and if anyone disagrees or disaproves its ok. But i believe after you have kids you can't think anymore about what's best for you, it has to be what is best for the family (which includes you too, just not only you).
Did it hurt when you pushed your bairn out? Is that the reason for the 'lanat' ?
Just because silly rhymes with your name doesnt mean you have to be it :).
Maybe you have been neglected too much to learn the basic manners and that just affirms my stance on this topic.
Yes, my mother did not raise me correctly. Please give sadqa for me. After all, my mother also gave me a name that rhymes with silly. Haye, meri kismet, or should it 'haye, meri ammi.' I can never tell with Pakistanish.
P.S, Dead parents find it hard to be 'good' so 'neglected' is all I have.
Yes, my mother did not raise me correctly. Please give sadqa for me. After all, my mother also gave me a name that rhymes with silly. Haye, meri kismet, or should it 'haye, meri ammi.' I can never tell with Pakistanish.
P.S, Dead parents find it hard to be 'good' so 'neglected' is all I have.
Oh and :) tenu vi!
Well those who didn't get the priviledge of their parents, its a tragedy but its ofcourse not their fault or the parents since its Allah's will. I don't know how can you compare what i wrote above to this.
Anyways, i apologise if i offended you with my comment in my previous post but i didn't know about your loss.
Oh Niks, hold on a sec. I have a relevant post to add to this mix.
Habitual disparaging of other people's upbringing when they disagree with you - what does that say about a person or goodness me, their own upbringing and the parenting received?
Well those who didn't get the priviledge of their parents, its a tragedy but its ofcourse not their fault or the parents since its Allah's will. I don't know how can you compare what i wrote above to this.
Anyways, i apologise if i offended you with my comment in my previous post but i didn't know about your loss.
Knowing about someone's loss or not has got absolutely nothing to do with not bringing peoples parents into an exchange over the internet. Also shows some form of lack of basic manners doesnt it.
P.S Sorry Niki, I remember what happens when people judge other peoples parents. I shall stop now. Promise!
ZK, why the lanat sister? Totally no need to lanatofy parents. It's a pretty darn hard job lemme tell ya.
PLEASE DO NOT DRAG PERSONAL RELATIONSHIPS IN THE POSTS> I'm really controlling myself with the warnings. Please.
I was talking generally not targetting anyones parent. Why members here are assuming i am talking about them? Why can't i share my views without this every ready gang attacking me? Why can't people disagree here in a civil manner? Go ahead give warning if i was at wrong but if you care to read the thread you can see who instigated it. Even then i apologized if she felt (which however makes no sense) that i was blaming dead parents.
Knowing about someone's loss or not has got absolutely nothing to do with not bringing peoples parents into an exchange over the internet. Also shows some form of lack of basic manners doesnt it.
I think you might would like to re-read post #7 before blaming me for this.
in my opinion.
. I am not in the mood for moderating threads today.