Re: Taking gifts for family bk in Pakistan..
i was newly nikahfied but previously engaged 2 huby for a year as well it depends on my frankness i think MIL created issue of a small thing if me n huby r ok no one else should pin point any thing
that is madraan sooch, but in-laws/MIL still DESI.
Re: Taking gifts for family bk in Pakistan..
Yep they think dollars grow on trees in our backyard. 
If it is someone who is student and cannot afford to , then I will have no problem with helping them out , but then the real deserving ones are shy to ask for anything. They have ego problem. You have to insist to them to accept help like this.
Re: Taking gifts for family bk in Pakistan..
i would say first five years sacrifice from girl can make her queen of rest of life.
Just a quick question: Do you expect your present (or future wife, if not yet married) to make numerous sacrifices and compromises in the first 5 years of your marriage so that in ur eyes, you can value her as a queen?
Re: Taking gifts for family bk in Pakistan..
The above question is aimed at @STA
Re: Taking gifts for family bk in Pakistan..
Just a quick question: Do you expect your present (or future wife, if not yet married) to make numerous sacrifices and compromises in the first 5 years of your marriage so that in ur eyes, you can value her as a queen?
it is my own opinion, as i saw many cases where girl was treated well by in-laws because she did well in early years.
i will more worry about my role and would like to create balance in relationships.
Re: Taking gifts for family bk in Pakistan..
i would say first five years sacrifice from girl can make her queen of rest of life.
Just a quick question: Do you expect your present (or future wife, if not yet married) to make numerous sacrifices and compromises in the first 5 years of your marriage so that in ur eyes, you can value her as a queen?
it is my own opinion, as i saw many cases where girl was treated well by in-laws because she did well in early years.
A girl can be sooooo extremely "obedient" *but her in-laws will *still **treat her bad, why? Becasue that's the way those in-laws were..
On the other hand, if the in-laws were good people and the DIL made a mistake, then they would correct her politley and show her the error of her way(s).. Why? Because they are good in-laws..
A DIL will only get treated bad if the MIL/FIL is bad and decide to treat her in such a manner.
So by your statement(s).... if you were to come across a young girl who was treated bad by her in-laws, you would assume she was a bad DIL becasue (in your words) she did not *"do well in early years"..
*Sounds all a bit narrow-minded to me!
Re: Taking gifts for family bk in Pakistan..
My cousin asked for a xbox 360...when it had just come out :o.I had two words for him and the second one was "off"
Re: Taking gifts for family bk in Pakistan..
turn off?
light off?
run off?
fly off?
Re: Taking gifts for family bk in Pakistan..
Ban karwanay ka irada hay kia ME ko ?
Re: Taking gifts for family bk in Pakistan..
A girl can be sooooo extremely "obedient" *but her in-laws will *still **treat her bad, why? Becasue that's the way those in-laws were..
On the other hand, if the in-laws were good people and the DIL made a mistake, then they would correct her politley and show her the error of her way(s).. Why? Because they are good in-laws..
A DIL will only get treated bad if the MIL/FIL is bad and decide to treat her in such a manner.
So by your statement(s).... if you were to come across a young girl who was treated bad by her in-laws, you would assume she was a bad DIL becasue (in your words) she did not *"do well in early years"..
*Sounds all a bit narrow-minded to me!
but you never know the situation which i was referring. you may have different experience/assumption and that constitute your perception.
Re: Taking gifts for family bk in Pakistan..
come on use ur imagination lol
Re: Taking gifts for family bk in Pakistan..
ignore the comment from the cousin. its rude to ask for something so expensive and not offer to pay for it. people back home dont all think we roll around in cash- its about pushing boundaries to see what they can get away with. (i could be wrong...)
devlish angel had every right to ask for a laptop from her HUSBAND if she needed one -regardless of the timeline. in laws always need something to complain about... ignore.
Re: Taking gifts for family bk in Pakistan..
Some relos in Pak seem to think that those living abroad can afford things more easily...which is not the case...and they don't realize how hard it is until they move to the west themselsves. My mom usually gets shoes (which are often requested), or handbags, or loose fabric for clothes for relatives....or my parents give money as it's impossible to get something for everyone.
Re: Taking gifts for family bk in Pakistan..
Same^
Sometimes makeup too.
Re: Taking gifts for family bk in Pakistan..
v always take bags n some clothes for relatives mobiles n laptops 2 siblings as well not on their wish but on r own wish :)
Re: Taking gifts for family bk in Pakistan..
forget gifts, my dad's khala who has 4 son, calls once in a while and emotionally blacks mails to get money. infact she does to all my dad's brothers as well. as she is khalla and they can not refuse.
we had hard time once, dad being ill and no income, and she called and caried and cried as she wanted to give good jehaz to her daughter. dad ended up taking cash out of credit card and giving her. at that time pakistani rupee was stronger than now and to make lakh it was about $3000.
we have few relatives who only call to get cash. and they have no shame. they never call us other than when they need money.
Re: Taking gifts for family bk in Pakistan..
My dad is going there this w/end and must have mentioned I was thinking of flying over in a week or two as well.. She just sent me a txt saying she was glad I'm coming and mentioned to get her a laptop.. I do normally txt her does she need anything meaning little things (won't be doing that anymore lol).. Dad said just ignore and doesn't she have any shame..
Devilish Angel, I don't think there was anything wrong in your situation, husband and wife is a totally different and a much closer + special relationship.. Your other half prob thought it would be a good way to keep in touch with you as well :)
You can text her casually that its around $$$$ bucks, you sure you can spend this much? It should give her some idea!
Re: Taking gifts for family bk in Pakistan..
LOL^
That would be massive pwnage.
Re: Taking gifts for family bk in Pakistan..
forget gifts, my dad's khala who has 4 son, calls once in a while and emotionally blacks mails to get money. infact she does to all my dad's brothers as well. as she is khalla and they can not refuse.
we had hard time once, dad being ill and no income, and she called and caried and cried as she wanted to give good jehaz to her daughter. dad ended up taking cash out of credit card and giving her. at that time pakistani rupee was stronger than now and to make lakh it was about $3000.
we have few relatives who only call to get cash. and they have no shame. they never call us other than when they need money.
same. some distant relative who I've never heard of starting calling at the oddest hours with no regard for the fact that it was 4am on a workday for a few months because she wanted money.
Re: Taking gifts for family bk in Pakistan..
lolz this remind me of myself hehehe i asked my huby for laptop after nikah he send it 2 his mum n my MIL was not happy n she still tells every 1 that how i asked 4 lapi after nikah as if i was getting married just 4 laptop yuck :(:(
Hahahaha..I did the same! My own laptop died the month before the nikah and my birthday was coming up! I told husband not to get my any ring nor any birthday present for my birthday coming up, instead get me a laptop if he could please. He was so darling about it. He didnt question me at all, AND I got a ring and a birthday present too! :D