Split debate-Spending thousands on a wedding dress

Lifestyle Wedding, Fashion & Beauty
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Re: Split debate-Spending thousands on a wedding dress

all my three cousins and bhabhi's wedding outfits were under Rs. 30,000 and they all looked so good!!!

its not about the quantity of money but the quality and satisfaction of the material and the design.

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Re: Split debate-Spending thousands on a wedding dress

Everyone shoudl buy what they can afford. We shouldn't judge other people based on how much they spend on their wedding day.

It's like, you know when people say...money can't buy you happiness...yeah well those people don't know where to shop!

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Re: Split debate-Spending thousands on a wedding dress

i personally love the fact that long kameezes are in and hopefully will be over the next couple of years cuz iA thats when i will be getting married. im not going to wear my wedding jora once, im going to keep my kameez long and make 2-3 different dupattas with it and have a shalwar and churidaar with it too so that after my shaadi i can play around with the jora and wear the kameez with different shalwars, dupattas and make it look like different outfits each time.
so that way if i DO spend a huge sum of money on my jora atleast it'll be worth it cuz not only would it be my wedding jora but it would be a formal outfit i could wear around on several occasions!

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Re: Split debate-Spending thousands on a wedding dress

^ Great idea about mixing and matching! That'll be fun b/c I am also getting a long shirt.

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Re: Split debate-Spending thousands on a wedding dress

^^^^^^
^^^^
thats a great idea....... i will get a long shirt even if its not in fashion..... i just love the look of it.......

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i wasnt saying that a darzi/kaamwala would have the same ideas as a desginer
but like my nani designed her 3 daughters dresses n 3 DIL's so she would get the farbic n then have the kaam done n the dresses r amazing n nothing less than designer except for they didnt cost $4000 dollars
my moms dress is 20 yrs old yet doesnt look like it at all.....
so i was just sayin that u dont have to go to a designer
not that theres anything wrong with it
its just my opinion

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Re: Split debate-Spending thousands on a wedding dress

Man the tackiest thing I ever read, had to have been where one girl said her bhabhi-to-be was kind of demanding an expensive dress....wait..that has nothing to do with the topic right?

One thing i've noticed. The more expensive the dress, the less likely it's ever worn again.

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Re: Split debate-Spending thousands on a wedding dress

I think why most people get upset about a pricey dress is that most of us on GS belong to middle class and cannot afford all that. Most of us dont even know anyone like that in real life. In their mind, they are probably imagining what they would do with thousands of dollars if they had them, and certainly wouldnt be spending them on one dress but rather on a car or house payment. Its just hard to fathom for middle class folks i guess.

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i can't agree with you more sumorani. you literally said what i was thinking of saying.
i have some family who are not that rich, but live computably, they spent about 15,000 on a wedding dress but someone said, "oh itna mehnga joora, itni tou aam tour pay logon ki aik month ki income hoti hai in pakistan" what should she do?? buy a 1000Rs wedding dress, even than i am sure someone will say, that is how much their monthly budget for the whole house it.

and someone said that, in pakistan a lot of people are rich because they do bad things like bride, and other haram stuff, well if they are already earning money from a haram source then everything they have is haram, even what they eat and drink is haram so why only critisize on the wedding dress, why don't you also critisize about their food, their cloths, their foodware, their cars etc.

what ever people spend on what ever thing is between them and ALLAH. what i believe is that even my 1000 Rs. dress might be to expensive for about 50% population of pakistan, so what should i do?? wear old newspaper?

beside, personally i never read, anywere that according to islam i can't buy expensive dress, if i am earing money from a halal source, if my money is not a loan, if i am paying all the zakat and sadaka than i can do whatever (halal things) i want to do with my money.

30

It depends on everyone’s budget, why are some people so quick to start judging? And by the way, charity should not be done ONLY at the time of buying a wedding dress but quite frequently according to our religion. Those who are raising this issue of charity, how often do you give it yourself? Or does the concern only rise up as soon as someone’s about to buy an expensive dress?

Sumorani has pretty much summed it up. If you can afford an expensive dress, go for it. If you can’t then don’t. Don’t kill yourself over it. It’s like buying a car- if you’re a normal/medium working class you mostly go for a honda or toyota but if you’re a doctor/ lawyer/ someone with a 6-figure job, you want afford to buy a lexus or bmw or mercedes or jo bhi. Yes alot of rich people do have simple taste where they don’t want all the show shaa but seriously, not everyone is like that. In my books, if you can pay for that designer dress you have your eyes on, go for it because you’re a bride, it’s your special day, everything you do is justified :hula:

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:k:

I think why alot of us raise eyebrows at the pricetags of designer outfits is because, well what Ira said.
What’s an extraordinary amount to you or me, might be nothing to someone else. And likewise, whats “normal” or a small amount for us, is extraordinary for others. However much u decide to spend on something is extremely personal. Personally i spend an obscene amount on food (eating out and groceries) that alot of ppl would really be shocked. But its a personal preference ya know?

The only time I could see it as an issue is if there are ppl within ur family who are in a totally different economic bracket…that’s when a little sensitivity and consideration should be practiced. But otherwise, why should I give a damn what someone i dont even know is spending on their wedding?

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Re: Split debate-Spending thousands on a wedding dress

to each their own! if someone spends to spend 1 lakh instead of 50,000 because they want good quality, i think thats fine. but just because they want to be able to boast their price tags or labels and spend 5 lakhs on 1 outfit, thats just a waste. you can get equally gorgeous stuff with the labels and with a less heavy price tag, and use the leftover money to make some more gorgeous stuff.

the most important thing to remember is, everything will be accounted for, whatever you utilize, whatever you waste.

IMO, waste of anything is absolute sin in every way, moral, ethical, religious, whatever.
you cant really generalize this answer though, because ofcourse, everyone has a different budget for everything.

but honestly, i dont think that just because you can afford it makes going overboard justifiable, what with the now very common 8-10 day extravaganzas, 100 bari joras (unless you really are the sort of person who will actually go through all of them before they look dated), 15-20 jewelry sets, the 3-4 lakhs jora, the 1000 people guest lists ....
plus looking at the whole nazar thing-- just another thing to consider

personally, i didnt compromise on elegance and quality, alhamdulillah, but ofcourse, i shopped around, i bargained smartly (the rukhsati was held in pakistan), and got everything done in almost half the budget i was given. they key was prioritizing what was "necessary", what was really "wanted", and what was a "waste"...

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Re: Split debate-Spending thousands on a wedding dress

and btw, i agree with sumorani, charity has nothing to do with how much you are spending on your wedding.......

and gosh, why do people have to be so judgemental!!

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Re: Split debate-Spending thousands on a wedding dress

Every individual has their own dreams, desires and different sets of budget for their wedding, obviously there are some fortunate people who can afford all the extra expenses to have a lavish wedding and afford a dress worth $4k or more, where as that same amount might as well be a a huge part of the budget for the wedding itself for an individual from a middle class family.

But i've also come across some families who could very well afford lavish weddings and an expensive wedding dress but rather opted out for an average wedding for whatever reason.

So i just believe that its everyone's personal choice, or circumstances.. just like we're all different individuals, we all have different thoughts and ideas when it comes to how much should one spend on a wedding dress. Thus, no one here is right or wrong.. you're all right in your own way.

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hey, i spen over 4k on my wedding dress and around 3k on my valima one. im not sure why this is a big deal? if you want to and can go for it. if you cant you can get something equally as nice for half the budget. but its really up to you yes? and wether you love your dress. thats most important i think
p.s. that fahd husayn dress is gorrrrrrrgeous:)

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i couldnt agree with u more! its ok to spend some money on a beautiful outfit, but some people just get too carried away!its true, most people wear it once and leave it in their closet for life. everyone is entitled to the jora of their choice and hopefully every girls wish of having a nice outfit comes true...but THOUSANDS of dollars? really? is it neccessary? gold jewellry i understand, because thats giving money for money in return, so it makes sense. there are plenty of people that can be helped with that money that goes to waste.

and i know most dont like relating clothing to poverty...but if its being mentioned enough times...maybe its time to get a hint

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that is not being generalized nor stereotyped. obviously people that spend $4000 on a dress can easily give to the less fortunate.

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No, thousands of dollars is not necessary but could be a wish/choice, yeah? I don’t think brides splurge on dresses because they feel it’s absolutely a necessity to buy an expensive dress but rather that’s probably their taste and choice. Just like the medium-lower class in Pakistan shops at Tariq Road while the elite choose to go to designer outlets to buy clothes, even the casual ones. That’s not because it’s necessary for them to do so but they just have an expensive taste :slight_smile:
And exactly how many people do you know who have sold their gold jewelry to help the poor? Normally from what I have seen, the gold just sits in the lockers as well (just like the dress in the closet) and either worn very few times or passed onto the children.

And for those saying how a 20,000-50,000 rupees outfit is so NOT expensive but a $2k-$5k one is, well newsflash, there are LOTS AND LOTS of poor people in Pakistan who cannot even afford to eat twice a day.. so even if you’re investing ‘only’ 20,000 in your dress, it’s still too expensive for many people just like how $5k is too much to you. So if we apply the same logic as you are, shouldn’t you have donated that money to the poor and needy as well? After all there are simple outfits around for even 1000 rupees :cheegum:
Easier to talk than do I say.

39

lol hahhaa :D it was so true but yet so funny where u talk bout what they would do with thousands of dollars :D

dukh thi rag per haath ragdiya tumne ;)

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Re: Split debate-Spending thousands on a wedding dress

My, my, everyone is getting rather rattled by this wedding dress pricing issue.

You are all clearly in need of a definitive fatwa on the price of wedding jora's, so I am now going to proclaim one:

EVERYONE SHOULD MARRY WEARING A SIMPLE LUNGHI AND VEST TOP. If u have a desperate requirement for designer apparel, please contact me, I am the worlds best lunghi designer and i warrant u, I shall NOT UNDERcharge u a good few lakhs for the priviledge.