Men who are not against polygamy [merged]

[MIAinVA]

Re: Men who are not against polygamy

@Niksik

Openly kasiey kahein, it would shatter their egos of being the saviors of mankind

^Hah, saviors of womenkind you mean

@TLK

People who justify it are sick minded.

Let me ask you MIA, if god forbid Mr MIA shows a desire for second marriage, will you take his justification that he only wants to support this poor widow from Sukkar who has no one left to take care of her after the flood. Will not you tell him that why cant you just send her money, why do you need to sleep with her.

In all seriousness :hinna: he won’t say that, I know him too well. He will just say I prefer a younger girl or something… he’s too blunt

Anyways, yeah the point you’re making is correct, I would say send them money if you want to support them, no need to marry them.

[Mirch]

Re: Men who are not against polygamy

I am sorry to say but this is exactly what my understanding is. We dont need to marry a person ( divorced, orphanced, widowed or abandoned women) to help her, we can easily do it without helping her. Marriage is mainly for sexual gratification and reproduction, be it 1st, 2nd or 3rd.

What about companionship, love , social norm , and many other reasons ?

[TLK]

Re: Men who are not against polygamy

TLK, why do you feel like getting bashed today my friend :(

I am just telling what it is. It is allowed mainly for sexual gratification.

[Niksik]

Re: Men who are not against polygamy

Mirchi bhai, Oh come on, why would you want companionship of more than 1 woman…isn’t that hard enough already . Now, sex, sureeeeee as much variety as possible. TLK is right. It’s sad but true.

[TLK]

Re: Men who are not against polygamy

What about companionship, love , social norm , and many other reasons ?

one marriage can take care of most of what you mentioned. I am not sure what you mean by social norm.

[Mirch]

Re: Men who are not against polygamy

@Niksik

Mirchi bhai, Oh come on, why would you want companionship of more than 1 woman…isn’t that hard enough already . Now, sex, sureeeeee as much variety as possible. TLK is right. It’s sad but true.

This is what he said:

@TLK

Marriage is mainly for sexual gratification and reproduction, be it 1st, 2nd or 3rd.

[Niksik]

Re: Men who are not against polygamy

Please repeat na karein baar baar, that too in the Holy month of Ramadan

[Mirch]

Re: Men who are not against polygamy

one marriage can take care of most of what you mentioned. I am not sure what you mean by social norm.

with social norm I mean society demands that we marry and cannot live with a woman without getting married. I am keeping religion out of the picture.

[princessjojo]

Re: Men who are not against polygamy

Finally... Hmm..

I was getting tired of muslim apologists who portray everything Islamic to be so 'ideal' and then try to sell it to the west/ non muslims.

Now the question is, what if a 'muslim' finds this reasoning/truth to be completely unacceptable? Does that put that person out of the fold of Islam? Is it possible to be 'disgusted' by this concept, but to be a good follower of other things, and still be a good muslim?

Or is a person who abhors this aspect of Islam(even though it affects only that persons life) automatically weakening his/her iman?

[Niksik]

Re: Men who are not against polygamy

Just because something is allowed doesn't mean you have to do it. Also, there are many conditions to maintain this particular act. I don't think there's any point aguing about the whys and hows of something that is there and real. It's up to every man to go that route or not. In the end we will all be judged for our actions no matter how much time we spend here trying to argue for or against the concept.

[TLK]

Re: Men who are not against polygamy

See you should not abhor any aspect of Islam, you can argue with the reasoning behind that aspect but shariat is shariat. 4 marriages are allowed but its not an obligation, even one marriage is not an obligation. So just stick with obligatory stuff and amongs other stuff, dont do what does not suit your lifestyle or taste, but disliking an aspect can weaken your eeman.

[TLK]

Re: Men who are not against polygamy

Niks said pretty much what I said :D

[Niksik]

Re: Men who are not against polygamy

I always do, except that I do it more gracefully…because I’m a woman

[TLK]

Re: World Population and 4 wives issue.

@MIAinVA

^Oh ok
I was just commenting based on my understanding anyways, that hadith really does not make sense to me… no offense to anyone else. .

offense tou srif prophet hee lain saktay hain, hum kyun lain ge.

[TLK]

Re: Men who are not against polygamy

:D

[princessjojo]

Re: Men who are not against polygamy

Just because something is allowed doesn't mean you have to do it. Also, there are many conditions to maintain this particular act. I don't think there's any point aguing about the whys and hows of something that is there and real. It's up to every man to go that route or not. In the end we will all be judged for our actions no matter how much time we spend here trying to argue for or against the concept.

See you should not abhor any aspect of Islam, you can argue with the reasoning behind that aspect but shariat is shariat. 4 marriages are allowed but its not an obligation, even one marriage is not an obligation. So just stick with obligatory stuff and amongs other stuff, dont do what does not suit your lifestyle or taste, but disliking an aspect can weaken your eeman.

That kind of attitude is ok. Life can be lived by leaving out things we dislike and focusing on the aspects that strengthen iman. Good.

But is it ok if that person refrains to do dawa because he/she (personally) feels like he/she can't explain/accept everything as it is in Islam?

What about raising children? I think it's best to teach them what you know but after a point you should let them make their own choices about religion when they have such doubts/feelings.

Thanks for the discussion guys. It has been really interesting so far.

[icicle1]

Re: World Population and 4 wives issue.

how come the only thing muslim men know about islam is their right to marry four wives. they uphold it like its the the one and only pillar of islam... when 98% of them dont fulfill the five actual pillars (i assure you, most of you dont pray five times a day, everyday). lets not even go into details of islam...i'm talking about the five basic things.

[mclovin123]

Re: Men who are not against polygamy

'polygamy is allowed in islam for men'

What are the reasons y polygamy is required??!all these replies are neglecting that Islam says it, yes. Are the circumstances different now, yes! There were circumstances which required this, which no longer are there.. i read a lot of replies saying their ok with it, or as long as the wife accepts it... i dont agree that polygamy is only about a man having multiple wives, its about the reasons for it...

im against polygamy! beacause it does not apply in this time....

No doubt polygamy is allowed in Islam, but there is big difference between allowed and encouraged (believe it was not encouraged) the reason it was allowed 4 because that time it was common for man to have may b 6 7 wives

By taking into consideration social norms that time, Islam curbed this to 4, and also put additional conditions, like equal treatment also asked everyone to divorce if they have more then 4.

Now come to todays world, polygamy though allowed in Islam but not really practical to have more then 1 wife (there are few peoples does have more wives but they are in minority), Arab society was polygamous society but we are not.

I don't plan on having 4 wives.... but based on your response.... do you mean Islam is outdated and needs a change?

I disagree with your reason. It isn't in the quran because it applied *at that time, *it is there for a reason - I don't have enough knowledge to know the reason but I know for a fact your reason is wrong.

The quran wasn't made for that time, the texts in the quran are supposed to be eternal.... if it was specifically for that time then were the christians and jews right to update their texts?

[TLK]

Re: Men who are not against polygamy

That kind of attitude is ok. Life can be lived by leaving out things we dislike and focusing on the aspects that strengthen iman. Good.

But is it ok if that person refrains to do dawa because he/she (personally) feels like he/she can't explain/accept everything as it is in Islam?

What about raising children? I think it's best to teach them what you know but after a point you should let them make their own choices about religion when they have such doubts/feelings.

Thanks for the discussion guys. It has been really interesting so far.

Miss jojo, no one is a perfect muslim and imperfection means that we all have doubts about this or that. That should not stop us from promoting what we do not have any doubt about .. and that is dawa. So no, you should not stop dawa just because you ar econfused about this aspect of Islam.

BTW, Islam did not invent polygamy but its unfortunate that Islam gets the blame of it. Islam just restricted it to 4 marriages. Jews, Christians and followers of deen-e-ibrahimi of Prophet's time were already practicing it.

[TLK]

Re: World Population and 4 wives issue.

how come the only thing muslim men know about islam is their right to marry four wives.

This is not true, I have not met a single Muslim guy personally who uses this allowance as his right and uphold it. Yes most of us do not pray 5 times a day just like most of women do not pray 5 times a day.

Also please understand that Muslim men did not invent Islam so stop using the things that you dont like in Islam against muslim men.