…that the men on this forum (Life 1) are far more open and accepting of the different women they can potentially marry? The various threads have shown that there are no hang ups if the woman is divorced, a Paki chick from back home studying abroad or has some faults. A far more mature approach is taken along the lines of “If we click and it works between us, why the hell not?”
While the women here normally place caveats on their acceptance of men in general. Conditionalities for their agreement to a relationship or marriage.
^ And the few men...........and yes, there are FEW..........who respond to the Life 1 forum are to represent the general male population?
Uh......I don't think so. There ARE men who prefer pure/virgin women......as opposed to those that are divorced. There ARE men......who prefer to marry women several years younger...as opposed to marrying someone around their age or a few years younger. There ARE men who prefer to marry either ABCD girls or those from the motherland. There ARE men who think that a certain race of women are better than another. Reminds me of a friend's dad, Trinidadian, formerly Hindu..........and is only interested in white women.
The "if it clicks and it works between us, why the hell not?" mentality/approach would have more "dum" if the guy is also able to stand up for his choice before his parents. Kehna to bahut aasaan hota hai........karna k dikhana aur baat hai. We often read stories in this forum of men who had to end relationships because parents (could be either mom, dad, or both) that don't agree.
Assumptions my dear cupcake. When did I say that this was a representation of the general Pakistani male population? You have a microcosm here, but its uniformity shows a larger scale of maturity on part of the men. I doubt you can deny that.
I was speaking regarding the small sample we have on this website or this forum and the observations are valid. The women here seem to have more conditions for marriage, and both genders come from the same societal levels etc.l
The issue is not on action. But having the maturity to accept that it is a possibility and a matter which is seen as acceptable.
Half the time here women run down men, yet men are open to the different challenges life offers us. Ask a woman if she would marry a divorced a man on this website and I bet half the women here will say hell no the others would make comments on why he would be a bad husband because he is already divorced.
The issue is not on action. But having the maturity to accept that it is a possibility and a matter which is seen as acceptable.
Half the time here women run down men, yet men are open to the different challenges life offers us. Ask a woman if she would marry a divorced a man on this website and I bet half the women here will say hell no the others would make comments on why he would be a bad husband because he is already divorced.
The issue is action because they speak louder then words.
Its one thing to sympathize and pretend to be accepting and another entirely to take these women home to your parents.
And a judgement you can not make based off the internet. You either believe someone when they say it or you don't. But that doesn't change the veracity of their statement.
...that the men on this forum (Life 1) are far more open and accepting of the different women they can potentially marry? The various threads have shown that there are no hang ups if the woman is divorced, a Paki chick from back home studying abroad or has some faults. A far more mature approach is taken along the lines of "If we click and it works between us, why the hell not?"
While the women here normally place caveats on their acceptance of men in general. Conditionalities for their agreement to a relationship or marriage.
Odd isn't it?
It's al lot simpler for men because they go after beauty and women want complete security that most men are not able to provide these days.
^ Assumptions based upon mere comments, **Fruitcake ** (didn’t want you to feel left out)
Kehna aur baat…karna aur baat hai. Actions speak louder than words and have greater value.
There are people who say that they won’t be able to do something…and end up doing it. They didn’t know they had the ability to handle it.
There are people who so easily say they can handle a challenging task…but chicken out when it actually comes to taking action and making it a reality.
So…who would have greater value here? And no, I’m not saying that the women would prove, through their actions, to be more open-minded later on. Alls I’m saying is that…saying/writing the “right things”…looking good on paper…can’t compare to physically being in a particular situation.
And don’t tell me that it’s all about verbally showing that you have the maturity to see a matter as acceptable and even do-able. I’ve seen people who can talk “mature” and “open-minded”…they can talk the talk…but can’t walk the walk. Not hard to say the right thing and betray ourselves when it comes to actions. It’s human nature, we’re all guilty of it at times (myself included).
The issue is not on action. But having the maturity to accept that it is a possibility and a matter which is seen as acceptabl
And a judgement you can not make based off the internet. You either believe someone when they say it or you don't. But that doesn't change the veracity of their statement.
And a judgement you can not make based off the internet. You either believe someone when they say it or you don't. But that doesn't change the veracity of their statement.
Right, so...
No orphan or widow should be left alone to fend for themselves.
There should be no injustice in the world.
We should all get along as one big happy family.
These statements sound great to the ears but what do they actually mean? Nothing until someone makes a move right? Who is going to say something like "no one should marry a divorcee because they are used goods now" to someone's face? You would have to be an idiot and looking for trouble to say that.
Saying it and doing it are two very different things. If I spoke to an unmarried guy who is around 36 years old about a girl who is 30 years old, good looking, working professional, hijabi, well adjusted member of society and a divorcee...you should see some of the reactions. They dont even want to see a picture, its a straight up "no, we dont want divorcee".
Kehne ko to sau baatein karlo. But doing it is sooooo much harder. Imagine never being married and introducing a divorced girl to your parents. You know what mummi papa will say? "Larki ko bohot zyada tajurba hai aur humara bacha aisi larki ke saat nahin rehsakta".
Im not saying there is something wrong with being divorced, Allah knows how much I believe in giving second chances. However, the trend in men is quite the opposite of what you're posting about.
...that the men on this forum (Life 1) are far more open and accepting of the different women they can potentially marry?
the thread is going off on a different tangent, the q is simple and i agree. so lets assume its all for the sake of an argument that no one really means what they say here, despite that, **in life1 **women do seem to be a bit closed off to the idea of accepting 'differences' and reluctant to overlook them, as compared to men.
Firstly and more importantly. Fruitcake? Seriously? Fruitcake? You had to make me sound metrosexual or damn near homosexual? Thanks alot cupcake. I don't like it. Change it.
Now the discussions boils down to what you believe when you read. I have openly seen on this forum women believing another woman that her husband or boyfriend is a horrible person more only than believing a man who says his wife is bad. Hell a majority of you women sad it was highly likely it was the mans fault that she was bad. You see where I am going with this?
Women are not going to believe a man is open minded due to the gender delusions on this forum.
I do agree actions speak louder than words. I do agree people say things for the sake of it and I do agree they are more open when speaking but more narrow-minded when talking about themselves.
But based on the general discussions on this forum, 1/10 of the men actually stepping up to what they say will be far more than the women being open minded on the matter.
