Re: Boys profiles : rishta hunt
Rather than write 8 pages of justifications for the back and forth barrage of insults on this thread, I think the answer is quite simple.
Don't sling mud at others if you don't want mud slung back at yourself. Simple, isn't it?
I spare none because in their ignorance they say statements not knowing who gets insulted.
So if I retaliate an insult with an insult its unfair?
Pcg didnt consult me when she set the rules for the insult.
So tell me, and im asking seriously, why should I consult her?
Do you muslims now forget eye for an eye?
Theorist you couldnt extract anything from my posts after I spelled it out. Yet there are others who even though may not agree, see the point. Why?
You arent looking for reasoning or a solution. Youre looking for reasons to argue. A way to be right. Even after others point out the same wrong.
I wouldnt expect any uncovering of substance in my posts from you, so neither of us is disappointed.
If only it was mezh. For some, the simplest concepts are the hardest to grasp.
Re: Boys profiles : rishta hunt
Thatz's great, wish other desi sub cultures would follow suit.
^^^Eastern11, Bengali parents can approach a boy's family and it's not considered strange.. or perhaps that's just the people we know :D
.....
Re: Boys profiles : rishta hunt
Agree :k:
Re: Boys profiles : rishta hunt
I spare none because in their ignorance they say statements not knowing who gets insulted.
So if I retaliate an insult with an insult its unfair?
Pcg didnt consult me when she set the rules for the insult.
So tell me, and im asking seriously, why should I consult her?
Do you muslims now forget eye for an eye?
Theorist you couldnt extract anything from my posts after I spelled it out. Yet there are others who even though may not agree, see the point. Why?
You arent looking for reasoning or a solution. Youre looking for reasons to argue. A way to be right. Even after others point out the same wrong.
I wouldnt expect any uncovering of substance in my posts from you, so neither of us is disappointed.
Way to put words in my mouth! This is your assumption, once again! I have nothing to say to you. I have no problems admitting I am wrong if it is said respectfully. Your tone is very disrespectful. You cam say everything you want to say in a less rude and crude manner. Learn something already! Your assumptions come pouring in as soon as you know the poster is a woman. You constantly begin your sentences with "you people, you women, you girl..." And then you are telling me you are retaliating? Against what? Who else talks like that here? It gives you away so easily, bro!
Re: Boys profiles : rishta hunt
you people clearly have a lot of time on your hands.
I actually do have a lot of time today. :D
Re: Boys profiles : rishta hunt
stupid mistake but I skimmed through a few posts and some of you need to stop pulling facts out of your bums.
phir lage raho 
Way to put words in my mouth! This is your assumption, once again! I have nothing to say to you.** I have no problems admitting I am wrong if it is said respectfully. Your tone is very disrespectful.** You cam say everything you want to say in a less rude and crude manner. Learn something already! Your assumptions come pouring in as soon as you know the poster is a woman. You constantly begin your sentences with “you people, you women, you girl…” And then you are telling me you are retaliating? Against what? Who else talks like that here? It gives you away so easily, bro!
[/quote]
Hayeee thand pa ditti badshao!
I say you girls etc because its that group of like minded people that im referring to.
Also, if my words have hurt you this much. I apologise. But seriously YOU PEOPLE (in this thread like minded to pcg) need to start taking just as much as consideration to how your words may impact others, as you do to how the words of others impact you.
I will try to be nicer.
Re: Boys profiles : rishta hunt
if pakistani men are marrying non-desis, why are pakistani women still obsessed with Pakistani guys only? as someone mentioned before, many guys do convert for nikah purpose and thats the only requirement, the guy doesn't have to actually become a practicing muslim. plenty of muslim born guys are only muslim by name too. if not that, then there are still plenty of muslim guys who are not pakistani like arabs, albanians, turkish, persian. yes many pakistani guys are marrying out of religion and race, but so are many pakistani girls. out of my friends, i know quite a few who married non desis and some even non-muslims here in new york. i dont think ratio of pakistani girls marrying outside of race is much lower than guys these days here in US. out of the people i know, there are more girls married to non-desis as compared to guys. I just dont see why its so important to marry only pakistani, especially when according to you they have no interest in marrying paksitani american girls
Re: Boys profiles : rishta hunt
its funny watching people fighting on internet
Re: Boys profiles : rishta hunt
How many threads (or phadday) are going in this thread btw? 
Re: Boys profiles : rishta hunt
Indeed. 
Boys profiles : rishta hunt
In our immediate circle of friends we have 2 couples where the husbands are Muslim and wives are non Muslim.
Couple A-- husband is Indian Gujrati, wife is from a Hindu Punjabi family. They have one son. The child has been raised strictly Muslim. The wife never converted, yet she takes their son to Sunday School and Quran school at our masjid gets up to make him sehri during Ramadan and even served on the finance committee of our masjid even though she herself doesn't pray/fast/even know anything beyond the simple basics of Islam.
Couple B--- both husband and wife are Sri Lankan, husband Muslim wife Christian. They have 4 daughters, all of which attend the masjid regularly. The wife does not attend but sends her daughters faithfully.
Third example I know of is a co worker I had who was German and married an Egyptian Muslim man. They have 3 children. They were married well over 10 years before the wife read Shahada and converted. Prior to excepting Islam though, she was taking her two young toddlers to Islamic preschool at the request of her husband.
So yea, I don't buy this theory that a man who marries a non Muslim will have messed up confused children or is being disingenuousness to the sisters of the Muslim Ummah. Men are given the choice to marry non Muslim women because they, as the head of the households are responsible for the shape of the family.
Since April, their have been about 6 weddings that I know of in our community...another 3 or so scheduled between August & Dec....people are getting married right and left...Muslim guys to Muslim girls, so I don't understand all the doom and gloom in this thread. (And yes, the guys are all educated and decent, the girls are not imported and half are matches made by choice in college).
I have almost a dozen cousins age 18-30 and for the ones in their 20's, no one has had trouble landing a suitable match...either on their own or through rishta scenario. We have one marrying a Persian Muslim, one marrying a Bengali Muslim and one marrying an Arab Muslim....and then 2 who are involved with non Muslims guys which is not going over very well with the parents so they are both at a stalemate.
Marriage, rishtas, dating, arranged, love....it is what you make of it. The gross generalizations being thrown around here are getting really old.
There are plenty of decent young Muslim men (and yes, they are educated!) out their that are perfect husband material, but the fact of the matter is, is that most do get snapped up/married in their mid to late twenties.
I'm not advocating a girl marrying at 18 so don't jump down my throat, but like it or not, if you're going the traditional, rishta route, then yes, there most definitely is a window of opportunity that lessens as a girl gets older. And if a family is not social, is not active in the community, then it is going to be hard to find matches for their daughters. It's all about networking, like it or not.
Re: Boys profiles : rishta hunt
If I read correctly what PCG wrote about guys marrying goris or non-Muslims but "Ahle-Kitaab" women, then she is right.
Some of these men do find "Islamic permission" to marry non-Muslims women and their families may show some resistance but later get convinced with excuse of
...." Oh she is converted, her new name is "whatever Muslim name".
Later,
Both Muslim guys and her gori wife do not even care of being Muslim. Business as usual.
Re: Boys profiles : rishta hunt
I agree, the good guys are probably looking elsewhere. Or actually, there are so few good guys, that they don't have to look or make an effort. Often you hear guys complain about how they've reached a certain age and aunties are coming out of woodworks to set them up with someone.
The problem is that if we look around in our community, it's very common to find guys who have 1) married out to non-muslim girls 2) are partying, and not marrying if they can help it 3) marrying nice mummy daddy girl from Pakistan and immigrating the girl in - seen more in the older families in the US, I noticed it's becoming less popular with the younger crowd around here now that everyone recognizes the immigration is a headache
The rest of the guys aren't good catches. Maybe my standards are way too high :( But I think if you're looking for a guy who went to college, and has a stable steady job, I would THINK those aren't too high standards.
Really, seriously, honestly, I do not understand all this.
If the aunties are coming out of woodworks to set up the 'good guys' with someone as soon as they reach a certain age, then is the gender ratio you told us might be a little off?
If the Pakistani community has many many good eligible girls, then why are 'good catches' looking elsewhere? Are they stupid? If they are stupid, then they are not good catches.
If they are not stupid, then maybe, there aren't many many good eligible girls around and they have to look elsewhere?
Re: Boys profiles : rishta hunt
Something I have noticed in our community, the desi girls are fine chatting with non desi guys, but the moment a desi guy comes across, they have this odd gesture, a very non welcoming face, they just act odd...not sure why!
Re: Boys profiles : rishta hunt
Time and tide wait for no man.
Re: Boys profiles : rishta hunt
Well that's my point. No one is trying to get to know anyone in this process apart from making assumptions that if she is pretty she is likely fertile or if she is a doc she is probably easy to get along with and will do anything we ask. Forget that the divorce rate and mental health problems in docs are higher than average. Same with lawyers etc. Or they assume no much education --> great paratha maker and instead they get a girl who let's out pathakas not parathas and then everyone is angry.
Simple basic stuff: get to know a person and you can avoid unnecessary divorces.
everyone does not and can not get a chance to get to know a person. secondly if you do get a chance, most people knowing that they are meeting and getting in touch for rishta process would be more pretentious than honest and true. so you can still not get to know the person and marriages can still end up in divorces.