i dont understand this whole thing were ppl say oh even if paki girls have realtionships they r done behind close doors some paki girls do indulge in pre marital sex so when they do get married they too will be "loose", and secondly you need to look at the fashion scene in pak if not go to the beauty section check it out i am not one to judge but since u r saying that oh girls in pak dress modretly so showing half ur legs and wearing sleeveless is modrete is it? i know enough girls in the uk who do fashion and r covered pity same cant be said about the pakistani counterparts
Yes. I know much of pakistani middle-class as well has higher have modrnised to extent of wearing half legs and that.- Thats is unacceptable and vulgar.
And ones who are liars or had sexual relations are unaccepatable.
Zayma,I do know many of them have become some ‘fashion’ obsessed.
Im never said im perfect, but I meant like every other man/women who hasa certain preferances/criterias, I also do. And its just my personal opinion back homes girls ones are usually fitter and prettier. If 5/10 10 paki girls are buff, then atleast 2/10 desi girls are buff.
Any-way this is just a fantasy thing, and of course balance of piety and sincerity is more important.
Inspite wherever I marry, my first priority is to ensure and investigate beforehand that the girl and family are trustable and decent.
Its my luck where my type girl pops-up in uk or back-home.
Although one complaint I know decent men make is that desi girls are often too ‘free’ with the oppostie sex, which they disprefer.
Men are also possesive.
OK Cool, im now signing off-and for the rest of the day. U ladies are tiring
Zayma I agree with you and funny thing is I have noticed that girls who are born and bred abroad they are somewhat more modest and a bit religious but what is happening in Pakistan is in my opinion families are getting rich and due to media exposure to different things they want everything that they can see on television. They want the western lifestyle. In their opinion it is cool and the IT thing to do. They want the ultra fashionable clothes never mind they might be causing the wearer to do a skin show. They want to speak English because they think they will be known as cool if they do so. Heck I even know girls in my university who came here from Pakistan and they completely changed once they came. They started smoking, wearing jeans, drinking alcohol etc. Girls abroad do not need to do all this because they have been born in that environment and this is why they know what is right and wrong, what is cool or not cool and this is why they can stay modest. It is highly unfair to say that American girls are loose or sluttish or whores. I could say the same thing about plenty of Pakistani girls in my university. Or even in Pakistan as per my experience and observation. Oh and OMG at the attitude some of the Pakistani people have. Not only girls but guys as well. They think no one else can have money and you should see how they act in Pakistan.
yes i agree with ya aisha amir_pindi i get were ur coming from
by the way its not just the rich girls the ones in the villages are just as bad and in fact i havent heard such disgusting stories in my life... when my cousins were telling me ohh you know this hapens and that happens and i was shocked they were confused by my reaction because they thought girls in england r much worse trust me, there r girls here who r badd but not like wat i heard about them girls
p.s i jus wana add that there r gd and bad ppl everywhere yes there r chalak girls in pak but then even in england there are and i think its wrong for us to generlise every1
I wish I had the energy to fight you...........but I just made some really yummy food and its calling my name along with all four of the X-Men movies. Im going to watch them one by one...:)
Im going to veg out today in front of the television.
Once again ,I observe that the most insecure Pakistan men - those who want a husband-fearing wife who averts her eyes and keeps to the kitchen - are those who are first to call educated and capable women "loose". Its their own insecurities that cause this. Because sheesh, if you marry a woman and even if she never works at a paying job for the rest of her life - wouldnt/shouldnt it be a comfort that she;d never need to hunt for a new man if something happens to her husband? I grew up in a mixed society, I treat men and women equally...so this makes me a "loose woman"? Explain please because I just dont get it. People are people. If you're raised in mixed society, you grow up knowing that people are people and thats that. If you're raised in a segregated society then half the population is amputated from your experiences and ability to communicate and relate.
Fact is, whether your ABCD or desi-born- all of us have committed our fair share of sins, and it's pointless to argue which group is more religious, and rather stupid.
There are many good Muslim women in the mother land who are innocent , great Muslim wives, and great Muslim moms with the very limited resources who work hard and live in a 2 bedroom house with 4-5 kids cook, cleaned, took care of inlaws, in the heat with no aircondtioning without an ounce of complaint.And they found the time to share whatever little food they have to everyone! Allah put them poverty, but they made great use of it.
There are also great ABCD Muslim women, who have worked very hard, albeit in different ways- such as studying and becoming something useful society such as a physicians or dentists and were able to give back tremendously to many in need, because they were given the oppurtunity. They learned Arabic, spread dawah to their non muslim counterparts. Allah gave most of us wealth, and many of these women made good use of it.
Of course it's easy to find sinful people everywhere!!! You'll find them in both groups. Do I know ABCDs that are sluts? yes. Do I know ABCD that are great examples and would want my own daughter to be like? yes. Same is true for girls born and raised elsewhere.
Same with guys.
So please, lets end this retarded arguement based on nothing but generalizations on whose better and save our energies for better and greater things.
the dude is expressing his personal views based on his personal observations, why are all the women taking it so personally? strange.
It's one thing to state a preference, its another to have a preference because you think the other choice is lacking or severely messed up. Kind of like, if you say "I like chinese food because American food is disgusting and atasteless and yuck" (ok just an example!).....thats how ti is when u talk about women raised here. You can say "I'd prefer to marry a girl from Pak" vs. "I thnk the girls here are sluts." **
Someone said in another thread that he gets touchy because we're dissing his country--well same can be said for those who insult western-born Pakistani girls.
Some people, in an effort to make themselves sound better, directly or indirectly, putting the other party down, and that's not how it should be.** However, when yoU (generally speaking) say that a western born girl is loose or trashy or a slut etc....you know why we get offended? because we see it as an insult on our parents.
**
Our parents worked just as hard as anyone else's **to establish themselves in a new country and trying to keep the culture alive and teaching their children Islam, and it was NOT easy. Most often than not, they dealt with struggling financially, racism, and in recent years, being associated with "terrorists."
So by a whole population of people considering us in such low terms, it really is a slap in the face of our parents, most of whom did the best they possibly could given the circumstances. All the struggles and hardships we went through, to establish ourselves, our identities etc--mean NOTHING when someone comes along and says "ABCD girls are XXX"
So yeah, we get pissed off and take it personally when you call an ABCD girl a slut or loose. :)
^ now THAT is a straight, objective and honest response, which i totally agree with. i was just getting confused with all the hysterical OTT responses.
It's one thing to state a preference, its another to have a preference because you think the other choice is lacking or severely messed up. Kind of like, if you say "I like chinese food because American food is disgusting and atasteless and yuck" (ok just an example!).....thats how ti is when u talk about women raised here. You can say "I'd prefer to marry a girl from Pak" vs. "I thnk the girls here are sluts." **
Someone said in another thread that he gets touchy because we're dissing his country--well same can be said for those who insult western-born Pakistani girls.
Some people, in an effort to make themselves sound better, directly or indirectly, putting the other party down, and that's not how it should be.** However, when yoU (generally speaking) say that a western born girl is loose or trashy or a slut etc....you know why we get offended? because we see it as an insult on our parents.
**
Our parents worked just as hard as anyone else's **to establish themselves in a new country and trying to keep the culture alive and teaching their children Islam, and it was NOT easy. Most often than not, they dealt with struggling financially, racism, and in recent years, being associated with "terrorists."
So by a whole population of people considering us in such low terms, it really is a slap in the face of our parents, most of whom did the best they possibly could given the circumstances. All the struggles and hardships we went through, to establish ourselves, our identities etc--mean NOTHING when someone comes along and says "ABCD girls are XXX"
So yeah, we get pissed off and take it personally when you call an ABCD girl a slut or loose. :)
Fact is, whether your ABCD or desi-born- all of us have committed our fair share of sins, and it's pointless to argue which group is more religious, and rather stupid.
There are many good Muslim women in the mother land who are innocent , great Muslim wives, and great Muslim moms with the very limited resources who work hard and live in a 2 bedroom house with 4-5 kids cook, cleaned, took care of inlaws, in the heat with no aircondtioning without an ounce of complaint.And they found the time to share whatever little food they have to everyone! Allah put them poverty, but they made great use of it.
There are also great ABCD Muslim women, who have worked very hard, albeit in different ways- such as studying and becoming something useful society such as a physicians or dentists and were able to give back tremendously to many in need, because they were given the oppurtunity. They learned Arabic, spread dawah to their non muslim counterparts. Allah gave most of us wealth, and many of these women made good use of it.
Of course it's easy to find sinful people everywhere!!! You'll find them in both groups. Do I know ABCDs that are sluts? yes. Do I know ABCD that are great examples and would want my own daughter to be like? yes. Same is true for girls born and raised elsewhere.
Same with guys.
So please, lets end this retarded arguement based on nothing but generalizations on whose better and save our energies for better and greater things.
Yeah, uh, I missed out on that wealth. My mom worked without air conditioning at home, in all places, south florida. She washed clothes by hand, because for some years, they had no washer or drier. Plenty of ABCD-moms who had to live pretty ghetto and make their saccrifices. Its such a turn off when men assume we women are lewd or loose just because of our birthplace. That's just ignorant.
i dont understand why each thread is discussing the character of women. most gals are quite ok. its the dudes that are messed up. half of em cant make it past 18 (whether in pakistan, US, UK or any other planet in the universe)
