Young Girls With Babies

Re: Young Girls With Babies

The story about the 13 year old father was actually outed as a hoax.

Re: Young Girls With Babies

I think it's really unfortunate that so many young Pakistani girls go the baby way. and it's not their fault really. society, parents, etc have never told them that they have other options as well. that they can do well in school, work, etc. as a country, as a community, as a people we need more women to get educated, to go out there and contribute in the workforce instead of just becoming babymaking machines.

the other day a lady called Bolta Pakistan and said that she was the lady who offered up her kids for sale. and how she wasn't getting any help from the govt etc. now, I feel bad for her. and ideally in a welfare state, she should get help from the govt. but is this not irresponsible? she must have known that she and her husband were incapable of taking care of kids especially so many of them. and yet they chose to have so many of them. and now were trying to give them away. what kind of a future awaits those kids?

I have a friend that I grew up with in the ME.......got married at 16 to a guy living in the US and moved here. Apart from the education, another obstacle she had to overcome was adapting to the life/culture in the US. Anyhow, she now has 3 sons..........is in her 20's...........and has completed her bachelor's degree in computer science.

I have a cousin who was and is very bright MashaAllah..........she got married at the age of 18. Is in her 30s now and will be graduating with a bachelor's degree in business soon.

So what do I think? I don't look down on these girls.........because I understand that some may even pursue their education later. What I do think........however........is that it's not a path that I personally would have taken. When I look back to how I was at 18.........I was a kid. I'm a big kid now.......but I was an even bigger kid then. I wouldn't have had the maturity to manage the responsibility of a marriage. Sometimes I think that girls who marry early might be missing out on that carefree time period of your teens and early twenties. I also feel grateful that I took care of my education while I was (and am) single. I say this..............because my friends who got married before completing their college education have told me that it's very difficult for them to go back to school and juggle the demands of a marriage (and children in some cases) with coursework.

And my cousin who got married at 18.........she admits that it was tough for her. I have a friend who got married at 18......and although she loves her kids and husband very much......and although she managed to complete her college education after marriage................she wishes she had gotten married at a later age so that she could have gotten to KNOW herself better as an individual.

Everyone's different. Some can handle it, some can't. Usually, most people (whether they get married early or late) wish they had done things differently......human nature to be unsatisfied, lol. So, when I see such girls....I usually think......"Wow, if you do decide to go back to school, it's going to tougher."...........and........."If you feel you can handle it, more power to you. But I think this it the time for you to enjoy being a carefree teenager."............and..........."I hope that your marriage is a successful one....because if things don't work out, it's tougher to support yourself without a degree."

There's nothing wrong with the scenario you pose. Not everyone has the aptitude to pursue further education or keep an interest in public affairs. 50% of the population has a below average IQ. And if the husband doesn't have a problem with it then it's nobody else's problem.

Re: Young Girls With Babies

We're living in a world where girls don't get married THAT young, so why do we have so many girls getting married so young when it comes to Pakistanis? It's because people think its perfectly OK. That it doesn't have any of the effects you mentioned.

:rotfl:

I guess so.

Erm exactly! thats why they SHUD go into further education to learn more rather than give up and jus start becoming a baby machine at such a young age!

I think it depends where you are. In the US, I know, everyone here seems to be in this intense competitiion to become something great! Whether it be dermatologist, Engineer, or biggest businesswoman ever. Really. I go to a wedding in my hometown, and everyone wants to gauge how much I got on usmle and compare it with there daughter. In fact, I DONT even know a Muslim Pakistani girl in my community doesn't have a bachelors. That;s like a bare minimum, these day. So I think your asssessment, atleast in the US, is incorrect. In my med school class, I feel like half my class is desi.

I knew a pakistani girl in my undergrad...who had A DAUGHTER, and got into med school, and now is becoming a dermatologist i hear (which is field that is really competitive to get into in the US- one of the most competitive).

The GUYS on the other hand- I think there the ones who need the education lecture, about getting education.

Re: Young Girls With Babies

Don't even get me started on boys.

Re: Young Girls With Babies

:rotfl:

lets make a another thread! :)

Source: Ten Facts on Teen Pregnancy in the United States - Teenage Pregnancy Rates in the US - Teen Mothers

In the United States, one of every ten births involves a teen mother. According to a September 2006 report by the Guttmacher Institute, the following statistics characterize teenage pregnancy in the US:

  1. Three-quarters of a million teens between 15 and 19 become pregnant each year.

  2. Very few teens who become mothers plan on doing so.
    Out of all teen pregnancies, 82% are unintended. Teen pregnancy accounts for 20% of all unplanned pregnancies annually.

  3. Two-thirds of teen pregnancies occur among teens 18-19 years old.

  4. Teen mothers account for 11% of all births in the US.

  5. Out of all teen pregnancies, 57% end in birth.
    Another 14% end in miscarriage.

  6. Nearly a third of pregnant teenagers choose abortion.
    Out of all teenage pregnancies, 29% are terminated by abortion.

  7. Black teens have the highest teen pregnancy rate.
    For young women age 15-19, black teens are most likely to become pregnant (134 per 1,000 women). Slightly lower rates occur among Hispanics (131 per 1,000) followed by non-Hispanic whites (48 per 1,000).

  8. Teens who become pregnant are less likely to attend college.
    Although teenage mothers today are more likely to finish high school or earn their GEDs than in the past, pregnant teens are less likely to attend college than teens who do not become pregnant.

  9. US teen pregnancy rates are higher than those of other developed countries.
    US rates are twice as high as in England and Wales or Canada, and eight times as high as in the Netherlands or Japan.

  10. Teen pregnancy rates declined between 1991 and 2005 but are on the rise again.
    The teen pregnancy rate reached an all-time high in 1990 with an estimated 116.9 per thousand and an all-time high birth rate of 61.8 births per thousand in 1991. By 2002, the pregnancy rate had dropped to 75.4 per thousand - a decline of 36%. However, a December 2007 report by the Centers for Disease Control shows a 3% increase in teenage pregnancy from 2005 to 2006.

Source:
Facts on American Teens’ Sexual and Reproductive Health. Guttmacher Institute September 2006.

My cousin got married when she was 19 and had baby when she was 20. Not because anybody forced her or anything but she wanted to get married and felt she is ready to raise family. Also, she wanted to get married to avoid from sins which are very apparent these days. After couple of years she started her Bach (part time). finished it and now finishing masters with the support of her very supportive husband. Now her child is her teens and she has very good full job and her daughter (my neice) is just like her.

What I am trying to say is that everbody's priorities are different that doesn't make them bad person. Is just their approach of life is somewhat different and of course same as somebody who didn't persue further education as well.

I like the way, Stoppit and diwana have put it in their comment about this subject.

May Allah bless that girl you mentioned in your post.

What was so funny about what I said? :slight_smile:

Re: Young Girls With Babies

That you said it.

NOT everyone is interested in getting a college degree. yes it is important and all that but there isn't JUST one way for everyone. if she is happy then i am happy for her.
i would rather be uneducated and a mother at the age of 19 then be someone like that girl (someone posted a thread few weeks ago) who is 30, and cant find anyone to marry her and out of desperation sleeps around with guys and gets pregnant.

^ LOL yea... true. If it came down to those two choices I would go with the first one.

lol both are extreme cases, but the point i was trying to make was that i think it is stupid for us to look down on anyone just because they dont compare to our society's criteria of success. the girl who couldn't find a person and is pregnent out of depression at the age of 30 have a college degree and must be successful according to what people judge other on, but she fails in life BIG TIME.

College education or post graduate does sound good and make a person so prestigious, but it doesn't guarantee smartness. i am sure all of you know many people who have amazing degrees, but the moment they open their mouth you wonder how they ever gone through their freshman year.
and an ability to talk over politics or have an interest in public affair isn't a big deal, every single uneducated dukaandaar, taxi driver and jamadaar can talk about politics in pakistan.

on the brighter side she will be able to done with raising her kid at a very early age. when most of us would be running after our kids and having no life because of the "after school activities" she will be enjoying peace and quite of her house or a second honeymoon after sending her kids off to college.

Re: Young Girls With Babies

By the age of 17-18 u do hav reasonable education enuf to educate ur kids and even earn if u need to. Not everybody is a good student. So many drop out after HS so wat if someone choses to marry. And seriously how much from our degrees we actually remember till date or imply it in our professional or daily lives? With time u forget almost all theories u read n just remember wat u learnt from ur practical life.

However i do agree that marrying early deprives u of the funtime of staying single long b4 than others.

It doesn't affect me in any way, therefore it doesn't bother me. I know some guys who have young wives with kids but I don't know of any who has any interest in beating a dhol at a mehndi.