wud u accept a souten? :D

[Pathani]

Re: wud u accept a souten?

@Dushwari

thanks Pathani.
for sharing what you shared here.
intense but the thought of peace you have is that you are the honest one.
such people end up in ruins. and that is their choice to some extent.
they choose to be so.
same for anyone, if people were taking advantage of someone.
sounds difficult to accept, but an emotionally disturbed man can be forgiven when he realizes what he has done and that he has the strength to address his wrong doing.
but the sad thing is that some people in this world, are unable to accept their own flaws. they project on others and in reality, their emotions are suffocated that is why.
wish you thebest now.

dushwari

Thanks sweet highly admirable sis! Promise me one thing in life, that you will end up with a ph.d… U r of the right material, knowing family and further edu are equally important. It can be done…
Reminds me of the song: Hit the road, Jack…dont ya come back no more no more… Thats how I think back…with lots of humour.:halo:

[shweetdreamz]

Re: wud u accept a souten?

marry 10 women if u want. but its a bad idea these days. unless you are an arab sheikh.

think premature hair loss, a low bank balance and dozens of in-laws

[Shoor]

Re: wud u accept a souten?

^ @ the inlaws bit.

I was wondering if angeleyes missed my question but now i realize it’s me who missed the answer.

[Neera]

Re: wud u accept a souten? :D

You go girl!! Love the way your phrased your answer.

If some woman needs my husband than I can find dozens of men who would be needing me too. If he is willing to accept a male sotun only than I will accept his idiotic idea of marrying another woman. YUCK

[Mrs.Shikra]

Re: wud u accept a souten?

@nisa_ak

lets say ur hubby wants to have a second wife. he says he will give u the same life as before, ur own house, expenses etc. just that he wants to marry another woman whom he thinks needs him. or wateva.
wud u agree? or wud u rather go for a divorce?

NO WAY!!! NO SOUTEN FOR ME

i will lock Mr. Shikra in his room until yeh dosri biwi ka bhoot chala nahi jaata …

and

phir i wil start hunting tht “other” woman

muwahahahahah:clown:

[PyariCgudia]

Re: wud u accept a souten? :D

This thread is giving me palpitations.

1. No man has "the right" to marry up to 4 wives. Its not a right, its not a privelege. Its a responsibility. And as you've seen from personal stories here, its rare in today's world that a muslim man take that seriously. Attribute it to whatever reasons you want, but most men don't have the tameez to handle more than 1 woman. We're living in a world and time in which people don't have tameez towards one another - we're at each others throats. And then you bring in this holy benevolent concept of taking in another wife as charity. Doesn't happen much these days, people. Wake up and smell the coffee.

2. A female can totally divorce her husband in this situation. Please keep in mind, that for a woman to be forced to stay in a marriage she is unhappy with is VERY unIslamic. Its amazing the bullcrap people come up with at times.

3. Personally, no I would not allow for it. The idea of "supporting a wife for charity"? Yeah? It had better be a morbidly obese woman on a wheelchair victim to the earthquake in Pakistan, and with 2 kids she can't feed. Charity becomes crap when he brings in a pretty 19 year old and says he wants to complete the Sunnah. Most women can fend for themselves these days, and if they're not getting educated to be able to support themselves in an emergency, then they need to deal with it. Leeching off my husband is not a way out. Even with no education, you can still build yourself economically in this world so that you can feed yourself, and MANY single women or widowed women do it. In the event I'm infertile, and my husband still wants a child, we can adopt. That's what most sane couples do. Adopt. And if he's not open to that and still wants another wife, he's free to divorce me and find someone else that's fertile (although the epidemiology says that chances are HE's the one infertile). I have my own life and interests and career that I can sustain myself without the headache of another woman in the household.

Its not about it being Islamic or unIslamic or whether its my husband's right or not. Its about ME not wanting to put up with another woman's BS in my home. I come home from a tough day at work - it had better be a home I WANT to enter. And guess what? That is my ISLAMIC right. I can choose who to be married to and who to not marry. I can choose which family situation to marry into and which one to not marry into. You don't stop having a choice after marriage.

[_MuNiYa]

Re: wud u accept a souten? :D

I thought everyone would shout no no no -
quite shocked by the reponses

[aminas]

Re: wud u accept a souten?

@Mrs.Shikra

NO WAY!!! NO SOUTEN FOR ME

i will lock Mr. Shikra in his room until yeh dosri biwi ka bhoot chala nahi jaata …

and

phir i wil start hunting tht “other” woman

muwahahahahah:clown:

Sounds good

[sweetu]

Re: wud u accept a souten? :D

poof

[Fbi786]

Re: wud u accept a souten? :D

^^ lolz@ dadas decision and now hes regretting it .....

But i think your father ...took the right steps and like you self said ...when your majboor .. you gota do things the hard way and thas what your dad did .........Respect to Ur Dad ... and your Mum For the Approval.

[PyariCgudia]

Re: wud u accept a souten? :D

BS - you're never "majboor" to get married to someone. You marry them, then that's your choice and your responsibility. No one can really force you to marry someone unless you let them.

[Mrs_Saieen]

Re: wud u accept a souten? :D

my dad had his rishtha arranged wen his cuzin was born basically his father agreed with his sister k wen ur daughter grws up im gona marry her to my son so........wen my dad was 13 he cme to uk......studied wrkd he did everything here, anyway bck to the point.......dwn the line he met my mum n in hope of not having to marry his cuzin bcoz she n her mother werent exactly angels....he married my mother but my dada ji threatened my dad k beta if u dnt marry ur cuzin then i will divorce ur mother.....what do u do when sme1 makes ur mum the bali ka baqra?? welll he carried on refusinf but eventually he went pakistan in 1992 n dada ji married him n that was with my mums acceptance, my father lives here with us in uk while my dada is suffering at the hands of the beloved neice for whom he broke all ties for with the family includin daughters n sons n wife, now all he has is her n she dnt give a crap about him he regrets his decision meanwhile she has 2 daughters n 1 son by my fathr n my mum has 2 sons n 3 daughters stepfamily with kids is in pk. ye he goes n sees her but not often its not fair but he was majbur, my dada ji has jus had a stroke but she dont cre for him at the end of the day its my dadi who has forgot n forgiven n is nursing him bck to health so ppl wat do u think of this??

Accha hua, when one will put their own flesh and blood through so much hell as ur dada did, he deserves to go through the same hell on earth...punishment for his sins

[sweetu]

Re: wud u accept a souten? :D

Accha hua, when one will put their own flesh and blood through so much hell as ur dada did, he deserves to go through the same hell on earth...punishment for his sins

kethe hain na"**kisi ki khasthahali ko youn dekh kar hunsne vale kabhi khud b khasthahal ho kar tho dekho"
**meaning yes he has put his own children n family through hell, and yes he is suffering but you should never say that someone deserves it Allah knws best wheather he is going to b punished in this world or the hereaftr for HE is the All Mighty and All knowing also punishment for muslims i.e. believers of Muhammad saw will never be punished on earth

[happyheart]

Re: wud u accept a souten? :D

A muslim married man cannot get married to a woman without his wife's permission. If he does then his 2nd marriage wont be valid. If my husband asks my permission for his 2nd marriage......I'll let him do that ........

wow sis masha Allah ...bless you lolz

[moin.ul.atiq]

Re: wud u accept a souten? :D

I have always maintained that if you can pull it off, having multiple wives is not a bad idea at all- Islam gives us this option as no other religion(except Mormonism) does. I believe that sometimes one husband and many wives is rather a good idea. Imagine when husband is away for work and the wife is feeling lonely- if there are 2 or more wives, they can chat with each other and no one will feel bored. 2 of my chachus have 3 and 4 wives respcectively and I haven't seen happier married women than my chachis. I don't know why many modern muslim women reject this idea so much- either they are too possesive or believe the other woman will snatch her husband from her. Sad we have started thinking like this.

[tweety_pie]

Re: wud u accept a souten? :D

@moin.ul.atiq

I have always maintained that if you can pull it off, having multiple wives is not a bad idea at all- Islam gives us this option as no other religion(except Mormonism) does. I believe that sometimes one husband and many wives is rather a good idea. Imagine when husband is away for work and the wife is feeling lonely- if there are 2 or more wives, they can chat with each other and no one will feel bored. 2 of my chachus have 3 and 4 wives respcectively and I haven't seen happier married women than my chachis. I don't know why many modern muslim women reject this idea so much- either they are too possesive or believe the other woman will snatch her husband from her. Sad we have started thinking like this.

if i need a chat i'll talk 2 my friends, its easy 4 u 2 say ure a guy

[kuri_kamal_ki]

Re: wud u accept a souten? :D

i'm to possesive in tht case i can't and i won't accept a souten
if he wants a other wife he shouldn't mary me....if he changed his mind i think i'll take talak

[AnGeL_EyEs]

Re: wud u accept a souten? :D

@moin.ul.atiq

I have always maintained that if you can pull it off, having multiple wives is not a bad idea at all- Islam gives us this option as no other religion(except Mormonism) does. I believe that sometimes one husband and many wives is rather a good idea. Imagine when husband is away for work and the wife is feeling lonely- if there are 2 or more wives, they can chat with each other and no one will feel bored. 2 of my chachus have 3 and 4 wives respcectively and I haven't seen happier married women than my chachis. I don't know why many modern muslim women reject this idea so much- either they are too possesive or believe the other woman will snatch her husband from her. Sad we have started thinking like this.

what works for one couple may not necessarily work for another. Besides some men can't even keep one wife happy let alone more.

[tweety_pie]

Re: wud u accept a souten?

@lal_mirch

God made Adam & Eve NOT Adam & Steve or Adam & EVES.

lol I totall agree. NO NO NO to a souten!!!

[case_study]

Re: wud u accept a souten? :D

i am a young man (still establishing my self as my studies are coming to a basic level for work readiness), and i always think if i had to share my future wife with the choice of her husbands 2 or or 3 or 4 , how would i feel.
and that sends shudders down my spine.
husbands who take it upon themselves to get shared among their many wives are in fact incapable of developing a solid relationship with anyone of them.
cheers!