i am a young man (still establishing my self as my studies are coming to a basic level for work readiness), and i always think if i had to share my future wife with the choice of her husbands 2 or or 3 or 4 , how would i feel.
and that sends shudders down my spine.
husbands who take it upon themselves to get shared among their many wives are in fact incapable of developing a solid relationship with anyone of them. **
**cheers!
agreed.....no man in this day in age is capable of doing this. Of course the Prophet (SAW) was capable. :)
You know when a couple has several kids (5+)..one right after the other ...they never really get to spend quality time with them...they never really get to know them on an individual basis.....I would assume that would be same case with multiple wives.
I have always maintained that if you can pull it off, having multiple wives is not a bad idea at all- Islam gives us this option as no other religion(except Mormonism) does. I believe that sometimes one husband and many wives is rather a good idea. Imagine when husband is away for work and the wife is feeling lonely- if there are 2 or more wives, they can chat with each other and no one will feel bored. 2 of my chachus have 3 and 4 wives respcectively and I haven't seen happier married women than my chachis. I don't know why many modern muslim women reject this idea so much- either they are too possesive or believe the other woman will snatch her husband from her. Sad we have started thinking like this.
so where do they live?
Also, do you know how people looks upon the woman/wife who accepts a sautan? They look down and mock her. They regard her as a weak person and pity her. What sort of ideal social status is that, to loose face because husband is a wild goat?
Women of today are too cunning. They cut each other up into pieces while smiling.....u dont know the games they play.
So give a future chance to wife to be and let her have an option...thats fair play and also her right. You are trapping a wife to be, by not telling her you initial "niath". Talaq is of extremes.....and should be avoided. You might be the path, she never wanted to walk upon....had she known the consequences of it.
And unless u r a father, you cant understand the pain a daughter or sister goes through when there is a sautan involved. Some children never forgive their father for doing so against their mother. Talk about a price to pay.....
i am a young man (still establishing my self as my studies are coming to a basic level for work readiness), and i always think if i had to share my future wife with the choice of her husbands 2 or or 3 or 4 , how would i feel.
and that sends shudders down my spine.
husbands who take it upon themselves to get shared among their many wives are in fact incapable of developing a solid relationship with anyone of them.
cheers!
brother, I like your thinking....one should seattle for quality not quantity