Re: Would the Desi girls consider marrying an Desi International Student?
^And then have people in Pakistan gush over the freedom you have here.
Part1- comparative analysis
I understand you are not generalizing, and I want to make it clear it is not an attack on what you are saying, but I will use this to demonstrate something.
see, so there is skepticism, because you see some guys go crazy once they get here, and thus girls are put off by it etc etc.
by the same token, local guys get turned off by what they see as some local pakistani origin girls go crazy, and then these guys or their mums paint the local girl population with the same broad brush.
point being, these reasons are only as valid as we let them be, everyone has to be viewed as an individual.
As far as guys staying here, their reasons to marry someone local can be from a number, they will stay here, regardless of who they marry, many of these guys have obtained H1 and are getting greencards on their own, but if they are building a life here, it may make sense to find someone who is comfortable with the lifestyle here. the ratio of Pakistani guys to girls who came here for education is heavily skewed towards guys. I dont know how the situation is now, but at one point if you had an H1 and married someone from pakmanland, the paperwork and wait time to get her to come over was pretty bad.
part 2- personal anecdote
I have some personal experience with it, my wife's cousins and the ring leader one chica engaged to her cousin tried to dissuade her from marrying me by telling her I was a player, party animal and what nots. The funny thing about that was that not only were they right, but they did not know the half of it and had some inkling of my grad school days, and not my undergrad fraternity days which my wife had heard all about from me anyways. however unlike guys getting here and getting freedom and then going bad, I arrived bad, and actually probably tamed down once i got here.
It boils down to views about life, I would never pretend to be some conservative type of guy and it was always laid out for all to see and know who I was and what I was.
I suppose some baycharay acchay bacchay desi bhai log got ignored like a big dog due to stereotypes set by people like yours truly :) if anyone of them is reading this sitting in gujranwala mad because his chica's parents in US said no...dude.. I am sorry.
part 3- vouching for shareef desi guys. My experiences have been that the vast majority of guys who come from Pak are basically shareef ppl, I know this because I was unable to corrupt most of them with my influence. and this too from unis that were in 30K plus student populations so large numbers of foreign students there as well as local desis.
Part4- misc after thoughts
PS: it did not help that her cousin's fiancee who was all campaigning against me was then caught making out with some dude in the backseat of some car
PS2: Indian chicas?? man why why why do these guys from pak go for indian chicas, when as an international student you have costa ricans, argentinians, greek, dutch and what nots..desio guys really need to broaden their horizins
Here here...alla analysis X2, sachi mein..
Memo to self: take a pic smoking, drinking, in a mini-dress and post it up on facebook
note to self,.. close facebook account.
Here here...alla analysis X2, sachi mein, just wanted to add my few cents to the discussion, I have seen both side, ppl from our university marrying for love/staying abroad and end up seperating after short while or showing strange behaviours ; and ppl marrying girls from abroad(while studing/finishing school or working) and making exceptionally happy life and family.
I am in the later group alhamdo-lilah. Here is my story; I was citizen here, met my husband the first day at the university when he was supposdely a FOB :) we had a big group of friends, which incuded some of my cousins and one of my brothers, my friend then(now hubby) always liked me, I kind of liked his warm and friendly and intellegent personality never thought we will get married. We didn't marry until we both finished uni, had good jobs, and took a while to convince our familes(because I am from pak he is indian muslim) so after 9 years from the time we met we got married. So a girl from NA/UK wagerah and guy raised in india/pakistan can work out if the priorties are straight.
Usually they guys who stay here for 4-5 yeras or longer, do turn out decent to marry. We can't disregard their education/good stuff and focus on the fact that they don't have 'janat-ka-ticket' i.e NA/european immigration/nationality tu they are worthless.
Marriage is a gamble any way you slice/dice it.
I can't thank allah enough that my hubby turned out to be an absoutely wonderful husband and father. His family is amazing, we get along really well, my husband always wanted to be close to them and have his own business and help his dad to manage his businesses so after my hubby being here for 15 years ,we ended up moving to India to try out life there for a bit.
There are always challenges, our sweet lil story may seems easy/aww so cute, but we had some major issues/adjustments to go through, so nothing is free in this world, you have to work for it.
I would rather marry someone who has been here/done whatever here, than getting someone from pak, 'bsdhgsvnkodfkjbghdflkjsov' most of those guys turn out to be wierdos. All these kind of cases I have seen except couple ( I would say3/10) are not happy or together anymore.
What do u mean by "NA/european immigration/nationality tu they are worthless."
Re: Would the Desi girls consider marrying an Desi International Student?
Quite many international students and guys working overseas want to marry overseas born and bred girls - some are genuinely interested in someone, some think its a good opportunity to integrate into another country/society.
Overseas born and bred girls think those guys are fobs and are just after their nationalities. They dont want to marry them. They want to marry overseas born and bred guys because they think they are better than them fobs.
Overseas born and bred guys don’t want to marry overseas born and bred girls, they go back home to marry Pakistani born and bred girls because they think they are better than the overseas born and bred girls.
Quite a clash of interests we have here 
Re: Would the Desi girls consider marrying an Desi International Student?
I find something uniquely interesting about this discussion. Women lament the fact that guys go to Pakistan to get married, and indulge in the notions that they are better than the Pakistani girls back home. Considering you lot are modern, open minded and better educated. Not my words yours instead.
Then when you have an eligible man who is not a citizen you lot think he is out to marry you for citizenship. Talk about over inflated egos.
Re: Would the Desi girls consider marrying an Desi International Student?
^ exactamundo.
Re: Would the Desi girls consider marrying an Desi International Student?
Hey you posted the same thing. Damn brilliant minds think alike!
It's not about the act (a student marrying a US/UK/CDN, etc. girl) but the intent underlying the act. If the Pakistani student wanted to marry a girl from abroad because she was the best rishta for him and he thought their temperaments were compatible and the girls from back home wouldn't understand him anymore, there would be no concern. But the thought that he may have an ulterior motive is where the girl and her family question what the guy values in her - her or her citizenship.
I've got an example in our social circle. When the guy first came as a student and was keen on settling here, he pursued a lot of girls hoping to find a sugar mama with citizenship. But the day he got his green card, he promptly returned to the home country, married a girl from there and brought her back here.
And I know, I can't paint everyone with the same brush, but these examples can't help but color your perception.
Re: Would the Desi girls consider marrying an Desi International Student?
^this is the thing, in my experience (fortunately) these marriages have worked out okay. this is gonna sound incredibly mean but there are a lot of girls who if they tried to find an equal partner in the UK, would end up with a pakistani chav. their parents do better finding a decent, educated, willing to work guy from pak. the girl compromises on the fact that he's a fob and part of his decision isn't based on her, rather the chance to stay here. the guys have their own compromises.
in fact, the dangerous ones (i've seen) have been when pakistani girls marry guys from here. i know two cases where the girl's divorced their husbands as soon as they had citizenship.
as i said before, no one should rule out options and put people into pigeon holes.
if a person is truly happy alone than compromising, i'm all for that. but a lot don't want to take a bash at life alone (working, being independent); they'd rather be married and be a wife. depends what one's goals are in life.
Re: Would the Desi girls consider marrying an Desi International Student?
It depends 100% on the guy in question.
P.s where is redvelvet? I really miss her posts.
i dont know whats happening with girls abroad, but pakistani newspapers are full of such ads!
^this is the thing, in my experience (fortunately) these marriages have worked out okay. this is gonna sound incredibly mean but there are a lot of girls who if they tried to find an equal partner in the UK, would end up with a pakistani chav. their parents do better finding a decent, educated, willing to work guy from pak. the girl compromises on the fact that he's a fob and part of his decision isn't based on her, rather the chance to stay here. the guys have their own compromises.
in fact, the dangerous ones (i've seen) have been when pakistani girls marry guys from here. i know two cases where the girl's divorced their husbands as soon as they had citizenship.
as i said before, no one should rule out options and put people into pigeon holes.
if a person is truly happy alone than compromising, i'm all for that. but a lot don't want to take a bash at life alone (working, being independent); they'd rather be married and be a wife. depends what one's goals are in life.
I totally agree. You've got those girls out there who've barely passed through highschool with grand dreams of marrying a doctor or some other six-figure earning professional. Like some other poster said - what's she bringing to the table that makes her a worthy partner?
Going back to the original point - having citizenship does not mean kai larki nai koi teer maar liya - she just has the good luck to be residing in one the desired countries. Entering into any relationship - the two must have complementary values and goals that go beyond the superficial attributes and make the two people compatible in the long run.
Koi kisi kai upar ehsan nahi karraha hai shaadi karkai - na larki, na na larka.
How can i contact ? 
Well this question for desi girls living in Europe,USA, Canada and Aus etc.I was reading the comments of girls on this forum on the difficulties of finding a decent guy.Well there is third category of guys "International students and Work Permit" Holders.There are thousand of pakistani guys who are on this status in europe and north america and dont wana go back because of the political situation back home.These guys study here,work ,get to know the culture,mostly open minded (better than the guys back home),not only willing but eager to integrate.But they do want their permenant resident card or green card.They can be a good catch.what do the girls think?
The problem with your view is this - in the UK a lot of these foregin 'students' come here on a student visa but don't actually study, they just work illegally in some takeaway. Which means they have no prospects and although they have an MA from Pak that doesn't mean anything in the UK job market. 2ndly, in my experience students from Pak are no more open minded than any other type of man from back home, that is to say they are all quite narrow-minded. (yes i know I'm generalising) Well, actually, some act open-minded when they are looking for a rishta to make themselves more appealing to western gals but as soon as they are married they become narrow-minded. This is true whether the guy is educated or uneducated. I've even seen it happen where the guy is a highly educated professional.
the other big issue is that as soon as these foreign students ger married they start calling their family over. whether it is their parents for an extended visit every six months or their siblings to live and work her semi-permanently.
So the poor western girl who marries one of these students not only ends up getting him citizenship but half his friggin khandaan!
I speak from personal expereince on all these points!
Re: Would the Desi girls consider marrying an Desi International Student?
^ personal expereince but not exactly the norm.
only for you … 
Exactly . :k:
shukeria shukeria. I hope they are ok with DOOSREE shadi. Main nai kaun see mustaqil kernee hai ..srif Nationality chehyee
*** phone karing *****