I am just saying, that weddings are a very good place for spotting a potential from you OWN LOCAL COMMUNITY. Better then a once a year conference, better then once a year month of ramzan, better then anything.
and how many weddings do you get to attend in an year? :), besides what I said was more of a joke :D
A passing thought.
Especially in the US here. The more I think about it, the more I get pissed. Whats the point of partition? I think this culture of keeping away the sexes really illustrates the hardships youth have, when it comes to marriage and stuff. If anything, weddings should be a place where you can get to meet/find/see potentials in a civil manner.
Disscuss. Why or why not are you against it.
I have no problems with segregated weddings. Some of the best weddings I've been to were segregated. I don't see anything to have against them.
The danger of people from our community marrying and dating non muslims is amplified, when the mullah folks FORCE (thats right)...force a partition.
On the other hand, I've heard of some people saying that they won't attend if a wedding is segregated. So I've heard of this "forcing" from both sides.
They can 
thanks for the permission man
All for your accomodation mon ami, otherwise I would have given an opposite fatwa. Now enjoy while you can until the fatwa is challenged or revised. 
If anything, weddings should be a place where you can get to meet/find/see potentials in a civil manner.
The problem is that I haven't come to know of any such party where at least few Desi married uncles don't keep their eyes within limits and behave in civil manner, what to talk of bachelors.
Anyone who thinks it is pointless to have such partitions should make sure that their sisters, daughters, wives and mothers are well protected from the eyes of people who would keep staring at every inch of their body with lustful gaze. Of course if one wants to meet / find / see potentials in civil manner, then one would also have to allow other boys to meet / find / see his unmarried sister as a potential in a civil manner.
The question is HOW would you able to MAKE SURE that the (Desi) boys who are looking at your sister as a potential would behave in a civilized manner ?
A Muslim women doesn't need to be scantly dressed for it to be inappropriate (Islamically speaking)... attractive shalwar qamiz, makeup & perfume aren't really allowed either infront of na-mahrams (as it is clearly stated in the Quran).
If following the Quran means that one is a hardliner, then so be it... at least those that chose to do so have a good "intention".
and just coz someone does xyz outside the party arrangements then thats their choice, it doesn't mean the host is obliged to cater to their ways of living at the function too.
pinko, what you are talking is actually "The way it should happen', whereas LB is talking about what is actually happening these days. (o well me research shows that this thing is happening since the day Adam n eve were sent down to earth)
there are several women who either are naive, or enjoy the part of "being objectified"...so they dress up as revealing as they could.
...but then there are men who gonna scan the women even if they are wearing niqab.
see, dekana buraee nahi hai...lakin ghalet tareeqay say un ko discuss kerna buraee hai. but then u also gonna see fitted burqa's...(q, q k un women ko pata hai k, someone is watching them, especially perchoon ki dukan walay panch waqt k namazi)
The problem is that I haven't come to know of any such party where at least few Desi married uncles don't keep their eyes within limits and behave in civil manner, what to talk of bachelors.
Anyone who thinks it is pointless to have such partitions should make sure that their sisters, daughters, wives and mothers are well protected from the eyes of people who would keep staring at every inch of their body with lustful gaze. Of course if one wants to meet / find / see potentials in civil manner, then one would also have to allow other boys to meet / find / see his unmarried sister as a potential in a civil manner.
The question is HOW would you able to MAKE SURE that the (Desi) boys who are looking at your sister as a potential would behave in a civilized manner ?
Only if your desi married uncles were educated and not frustated. On the same note why these uncles are frustrated do their wives lack in something. A bit of spice may end their frustration.
I am an uncle myself but fortunately I am not frustrated, I absolutely love my wife because she takes care of me completely. Now is that the contributing factor of these frustrated uncles being lustful, are their wives being ---- retentive?
pinko, what you are talking is actually "The way it should happen', whereas LB is talking about what is actually happening these days. (o well me research shows that this thing is happening since the day Adam n eve were sent down to earth)
there are several women who either are naive, or enjoy the part of "being objectified"...so they dress up as revealing as they could.
...but then there are men who gonna scan the women even if they are wearing niqab.
see, dekana buraee nahi hai...lakin ghalet tareeqay say un ko discuss kerna buraee hai. but then u also gonna see fitted burqa's...(q, q k un women ko pata hai k, someone is watching them,** especially perchoon ki dukan walay panch waqt k namazi)**
Wicked woman get ready for a fatwa. :)
There's always a right and always a wrong... there are some areas of grey but this is not one of them. I dont mean to argue either, perhaps discuss?
Women exposing more then whats Islamically allowed is wrong. Men repeatedly looking at women is Islamically wrong too. The opportunity for these two to foster is hence wrong. Of course the choise is ours at the end of the day, but that doesn't change whats wrong/ right.
Thank you very much and Submission too. I was kinda hoping someone would point that out. Whats wrong is wrong, doesn't matter what your intentions are.
pinko, what you are talking is actually "The way it should happen', whereas LB is talking about what is actually happening these days. (o well me research shows that this thing is happening since the day Adam n eve were sent down to earth)
there are several women who either are naive, or enjoy the part of "being objectified"...so they dress up as revealing as they could.
...but then there are men who gonna scan the women even if they are wearing niqab.
see, dekana buraee nahi hai...lakin ghalet tareeqay say un ko discuss kerna buraee hai. but then** u also gonna see fitted burqa's**...(q, q k un women ko pata hai k, someone is watching them, especially perchoon ki dukan walay panch waqt k namazi)
HUH?
Theres an ayah in the Quran that tells men to lower their gaze which means dekhna bura nahi, MANA hai, as in sin hai.
Just because some woman is doing something wrong does that mean men should do sins too?
I dont care what you people do, we are all gonna pay for our own deeds but please don't change Islam to fit your views.
HUH? Theres an ayah in the Quran that tells men to lower their gaze which means dekhna bura nahi, MANA hai, as in sin hai.
Just because some woman is doing something wrong does that mean men should do sins too?
I dont care what you people do, we are all gonna pay for our own deeds but please don't change Islam to fit your views.
all of us are equally obliged to seek knowledge of Islam, but not everyone does it. some are blessed (even hafiz-e-Qurans) but they dont apply those teachings in their daily lives, and some are still living in the era of jahalia.
what you are saying is actually the way ostrich responds when it sees its predator, and that is, instead of running it put its head inside the ground.
app jo kuch khe rahi hain its a definition of Utopian world, and no one is questioning that. But what i am saying is actually what i see.
app kisi aadmi ko kahin geen k nazrain neechi rekho, to they will say k app aisa tayar hoker mut samnay ayea kero, akhir ko ALLAH SWT nay ankh dekhany k leya dee hai.
if u use ur eyes to gain pleasure, then i cant do anything cuz i use my eyes to differeniate between what is good and what is bad.
just go to life forum threads...women are dying to showcase themselves. :)
no one is perfect…so Ullema bhi yeh soochana choor dain k wo sub say naik hain.
ALLAH SWT nay meray jaisay normal logoon ko bhi kuch samjh booj dee hai.
or namaz say naik zahir hona…whereas its farz on us, to give charachter certificate…God knows why ppl dont look up into history.
during Noor-uddin Zangi’s time, two perhaizgar muslims (who were in reality, jewish) ask permission to do ibadah in roza-e-rasool PBUH…and they got permission since they were showing off their Ibadah.
and 
what plan they had in their mind. 
The question is HOW would you able to MAKE SURE that the (Desi) boys who are looking at your sister as a potential would behave in a civilized manner ?
I;ve been to exactly two segregated weddings both of which were very nice. Also have been to almost countless UNsegregated weddings which were FUN. Good, clean, respectful fun without the type of trashy behavior you want to apply to all of mankind.
The thing is, the type of people that I know have been raised in such a manner that they know how to conduct themselves in polite company. The leering, ogling, fighting types of weddings I've read about in "scandal sheets" and heard reports about from others invariably deal with the low sort of person who seems to have been raised without benefit of parental teachings in the subject of polite and respectful behavior. And this goes for Desi as well as Gori weddings.
ps I think that a bride and groom should decide what kind of wedding they want for themselves - be it segregated or not. Its THEIR day and they should invite those who know how to conduct themselves. I mean come on, a man who sees a dressed up gal should be able to contain himself and if he cannot then he should not attend functions where he is expected to do so.
You'd rather risk a generation to go and date/marry non muslims then what YOU think is wrong or right? Its not a choice, when you are overseas...its a necessity to have mixed gatherings.
You are assuming everyone wants to bang everyone, which makes you a sick sick person. Why would you think like that? You are watching too many indian movies...which is also unislamic.
I've been brought up overseas too, its never been a necessity thus far. And no, most of those I know that do cater for segregation dont have kids who date/ marry non muslim girls.
And I assumed nothing. I was giving reference to the Quran when I said what I said, so it wasn't my thinking. God Humself has ordered women to dress in a certain manner infront of na-mahrams and for men to lower their gazes... it wasn't me, so could you kindly not make sweeping statements about me. And thank you for that reminder on Indian movies, you're right, they are unislamic thats why I dont watch them.
pinko, what you are talking is actually "The way it should happen', whereas LB is talking about what is actually happening these days. (o well me research shows that this thing is happening since the day Adam n eve were sent down to earth)
there are several women who either are naive, or enjoy the part of "being objectified"...so they dress up as revealing as they could.
...but then there are men who gonna scan the women even if they are wearing niqab.
see, dekana buraee nahi hai...lakin ghalet tareeqay say un ko discuss kerna buraee hai. but then u also gonna see fitted burqa's...(q, q k un women ko pata hai k, someone is watching them, especially perchoon ki dukan walay panch waqt k namazi)
you mean to say that since there will always be men out there who "scan" women in the wrong manner irrespective of how she is dressed, women should just give in and accept it?!?
we are only responsible for our own actions, and we will be judges against what was prescibed in the Quran and Sunnah... so its best to not let what other ppl are doing around us, or how times have changed to effect our definition of right/ wrong (as this has already been defined by the All Mighty and does not need upgrading)
you mean to say that since there will always be men out there who "scan" women in the wrong manner irrespective of how she is dressed, women should just give in and accept it?!?
we are only responsible for our own actions, and we will be judges against what was prescibed in the Quran and Sunnah... so its best to not let what other ppl are doing around us, or how times have changed to effect our definition of right/ wrong (as this has already been defined by the All Mighty and does not need upgrading)
i said u are talking in terms of what should be happening....whereas he stated what exactly is happening....u both are in two different boats.
he said based on his cognition, and u are saying interms of Islamic Rules.
and i am saying if ppl follow Islamic teachings Pakistan would have been a Utopian (or least will become a first world country as where wont be any chaos, corruption will left).
but even though Pakistan is a Islamic Republic...but can u declare it one?
understand the problem pinks....Islam ko samjh ker qadam utahana cheyee hai...namaz wahan bhut saray pathan (and afghani) bhi perhtay hain lakin wohi loug heroine bhi bachtay hain. :)
Re: Why Weddings with "partitions" are pointless
Has anyone had this happen to a wedding they have attended?
That they segregate the women and men and then the women dance whilst they allow the camera man to take their video!
Not only is the segregation rule not being properly followed but then afterwards everyone gets a copy of the movie to watch in the homes.
I dislike segregation because it provides more reason for frivolous activity at least in a public area people will be more reserved and dress more appropriately.
Re: Why Weddings with "partitions" are pointless
psyah hahhah yeah. been to 2 of those. the baychari hijabis dancing were really upset and they had a right to be..but its stupid that they had this dude with teh camcorder there.
actually i went to a wedding where it was a joint mehndi then last minute they ask all the men to leave so the grroms side is liek no, u cant make rules on the spot especially if it is a joint function.
so all these chicas were really mad, so they did not dance
you know what they did...
they danced on the wedding day.
i am still not quite sure of any presence of logic there.
and then we had a wedding where the guys from the grroms side could not take pics but teh guys from the girls side could.
I tell ya ppl are strange
Re: Why Weddings with "partitions" are pointless
Hmmm, I heard of this wedding in another state where they carried out the mehendi and shaadi and walima with total purdah very efficiently. I was not there but someone told me how well it was arranged.
They had no professional photographer or cameraman. Just relatives. It was a very lavish arrangement in terms of food and decorations but no music whatsoever.
Re: Why Weddings with "partitions" are pointless
man get nikkah in the masjid and go for honeymoon then come back to walima for the close family and friends
only i wish
A passing thought.
Especially in the US here. The more I think about it, the more I get pissed. Whats the point of partition? I think this culture of keeping away the sexes really illustrates the hardships youth have, when it comes to marriage and stuff. If anything, weddings should be a place where you can get to meet/find/see potentials in a civil manner.
Disscuss. Why or why not are you against it.
I don't see any problem with it. In fact, my own wedding was segregated as were those of most of my friends.