Re: why should a girl leave her parents home but guys shouldn't?
I never want to reply more than once in a thread, but just the sheer ignorance in this one.
Given your weak physique you still want to go out and fight manly battles? How so considerate of you. Just because you have expressed desire to fight among men you expect armed forces to what? Lower their criteria? What law it is you are talking about that you have to fight? And really nobody gets enlisted through military draft these days? This is the other thing about these Murricans, they are so blissfully ignorant about the world outside of their borders. Did you even bother Googling it before presenting that as a fact? Lady, even in a country like Pakistan which is constantly bashed on these forums, women can try out for armed forces.
Many women serve in the military all over the world. they are not in infantry but they still get deployed to war zones. I know Marine corp women fight and shoot! plenty of women soldiers have also died serving this country.
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Since it's the desi culture we are talking about, how many desi women in Pakistan work as bricklayers, mason? How many desi women did you see laying roofs in the middle of summer? How many desi women gardeners do you know? How many desi women work in a coal mine? What would you rather do? Laundry or lay bricks in the middle of July? The stuff you women b**** about. Oh yeah all those mothers and kaamwalis who have died from inhaling all that coal dust from years of house work. Every single menial, dangerous job in our ohsopatriarchical desi culture is done my men. You know why? Because we still believe that women are the fairer more delicate sex. You can grow your armpit hair all you want, and it still won't change the fact. And how flippin' spoiled are you? You want all the good bits of a man's life and none of the tough ones, like it's a buffet. "Oh equal pay, I'll take that", "Lift as much weight as he can, screw that", "Fix a sewer, no that's icky, that's yucky"
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you need to get your facts straight, do you even know how many women work as manual laborers? plenty. they work in factories, they lay bricks, they do farming. this comfy housewife life is only available to few women out of the whole population of pakistan. do yhou think the entire pakistani population lives in cities?? yes a girl growing up in khi probably wouldn't be laying bricks even if shes poor, she would probably be cleaning someones house for a few rupees. thats also physical labor. however, in the villages, THERE IS NO CONCEPT OF HOUSEWIVES! those women work in the fields just like their men.
Re: why should a girl leave her parents home but guys shouldn't?
Why should she live in susraal? give me a good reason.
Cause that is one of the house where her husband lives. And if this is what she knew when married.
And unless her husband is willing to live completely separate from both families or he decides to live with his family and not with her family and she disagrees.......,
she can go and live by herself....... or stay with her parents forever. Period.
Re: why should a girl leave her parents home but guys shouldn't?
Cause that is one of the house where her husband lives. And if this is what she knew when married.
And unless her husband is willing to live completely separate from both families or he decides to live with his family and not with her family and she disagrees.......,
she can go and live by herself....... or stay with her parents forever. Period.
How is that attitude working out for ya' with the ladies?
Re: why should a girl leave her parents home but guys shouldn't?
Yah, if that is how some guy talked to me, I'd be more than happy to stay with my parents. Who is gonna deal with that sort of attitude from a guy?
Not just the guy, imagine putting up with attitude from his mother, father, sister, brother. and not being able to live your life they way you want but must conform to your "new family's" way of life. i would never ever in a million years put up with this and i hope women really stand up for their rights. of course it does work for some and many are happy in that system , but for those who are not, my heart goes out to them. i have had an ex-MIL who gave me attitude,i never lived with her, but even then it was so hard to tolerate her nonsense. so i can understand the suffering of those who have to put up with that constant taanays and taunts. hope this system of torture ends.
Re: why should a girl leave her parents home but guys shouldn’t?
huh? have you not read the million posts of women complaining about MIL’s here?
how on earth is it sinister to suggest a girl shouldn’t have to live with inlaws??
i have no idea what your goal is here either, if you think this thread is so sinister, why do you feel the need to even respond?
Re: why should a girl leave her parents home but guys shouldn't?
huh? have you not read the million posts of women complaining about MIL's here?
how on earth is it sinister to suggest a girl shouldn't have to live with inlaws??
i have no idea what your goal is here either, if you think this thread is so sinister, why do you feel the need to even respond?
My idea is to find the happy medium and not to incite men or women to go in to collision path and stay happy forever.
Re: why should a girl leave her parents home but guys shouldn't?
I get what ur saying about the bs gender roles and the restriction. But u do understand that most of the women posting here are saying k ghar k kaam bhi nahi karnay Aur job bhi for fun karni hae ya Apni marzi say karni hae? They don't want the financial burden and they don't want the household responsibility. I think that's what creating all the problems now between couples. Undefined gender roles. Not to say that it should go back to what it was in the 50's but there has to be a healthy medium. Right now most of the women here are wanting to have their cake and eat it too. And I think u can only do that in countries where labour is cheap. So it's actually feasible to have someone else do all the tasks u hate. So u can just raise ur kids and enjoy ur career, and the maid/cook/driver does the rest. Or ofcourse u have nice supportive inlaws who will manage ur slack at home. Now that would be nice.
And that is another issue! I pointed this out very early on in this thread. This issue of not wanting any responsibility is not the case with every woman. I have yet to experience life the way I want because I have always put my needs and wishes aside to assist my husband to be a good son. I have nothing left at the end of the day for my own family. I have given my everything since the day I met him. He is my top priority but his priorities were claimed the day he was born. A the end of the day, I never ask anyone for anything. I take a lot of pride in that and I just wish I was given a fair chance to experience life how I want. I guess I do have identity issues. I don't know what my role is. Everyone else's has been clearly defined.
Re: why should a girl leave her parents home but guys shouldn't?
My idea is to find the happy medium and not to incite men or women to go in to collision path and stay happy forever.
You acted negatively. Not good.
nothing negative in standing up against evil susraal where women are subjected to taunts and taanay on daily basis. easy for you to say this, you're a pakistani guy. you will never have to put up with this kind of crap. when you have a daughter, I bet you would not want her to go through this.
there are women here who post stuff like this everyday, makes me sick that they have to put up with such an ancient terrible humiliating system called susraal. yes it's evil for many people. and on top of that, there is no islamic basis for it either so really it's just something people made up themselves to control their DIL's..
And all those of you saying women are not the same as men, yes physically they are not. but that doesn't justify her having to abandon her parents and living with inlaws. i will also use the word "abandon" here because thats what people here seem to use when men leave their parents home after marriage..
Re: why should a girl leave her parents home but guys shouldn't?
Women who are truly suppressed and deserve to be given their rights, can not even spell the word 'rights'. They don't even know what on earth are feminists and women's rights movements.
Re: why should a girl leave her parents home but guys shouldn't?
That's true. A man who leaves his home is seen to be abandoning his parents. If a girl leaves her home, that's not considered abandonment.
Ridiculous.
Yup we have such double standards. no one remembers islamic values when it comes to providing a seperate house for the wife, but when it comes to polygamy, phir islam yaad ajata hai.