Re: Why are muslim parents so concerned about little little things?
You are also from England, right? It's different in North America. We celebrate everything. Holidays like Halloween, Thanksgiving, etc. are not really a big deal in the UK/Europe.
Also, a while ago I already mentioned in another thread that it is our duty as Muslims to promote Eid and holidays when the time comes. It's our job to educate other kids and their parents and to show (and include them) in our festivities.
That's what I did on Eid with my son. I got his friends Eid presents and sent Sonu to daycare in a nice shalwar kameez. The other parents were surprised and didn't realize that it was our holiday. We have a responsibility as well, right?
Thats right I guess. In UK, Valentines day is not sponsored by schools and I'm actually quite proud of it. lol
Re: Why are muslim parents so concerned about little little things?
Its a shame commcerial world can't really cash heart day, Diabetes day, poetry day, women's day, children's day, rose day, earth day, boss day, animals day, kidney day...the list is endless.
Some of these occasions/events are acknowledged in the form of fundraising. Earth Day is a big deal across the schools with students. They usually raise funds and also plant a tree or some form of greenery. A lot of companies and schools sponsor charities (Heart and Stroke Foundation, Breast Cancer, Cancer Society, Diabetes Society, Terry Fox, etc.) throughout the year. Items are sold, people are asked to donate funds or volunteer, people participate in charity runs/bike runs and these are usually huge events raising thousands and thousands of dollars. This is normally involves the entire community and it is voluntary to participate.
I don't know if V Day is "sponsored" by schools. I really don't see the harm in little kids sharing treats as someone above mentioned that it brings a smile onto their face. The secondary schools (highschools) are not really into it.
Re: Why are muslim parents so concerned about little little things?
I don't know about USA, but over here,** V day is not a festival*, Christmas is and so is Diwali and Eid, but **V-day is a just a *day with all sorts of commercial fluff associated with**. If you think about we literally have a day for everything in the West, are they all considered festivals? Its a shame commcerial world can't really cash heart day, Diabetes day, poetry day, women's day, children's day, rose day, earth day, boss day, animals day, kidney day...the list is endless.
I would understand if parents who appreciate school promoting Eid opposing school's promotion of Diwali. Thats an all valid and relevant issue.
that solves the problem. Muslim parents should not have religious issues with it then....specially in UK eh?
Re: Why are muslim parents so concerned about little little things?
Some of these occasions/events are acknowledged in the form of fundraising. Earth Day is a big deal across the schools with students. They usually raise funds and also plant a tree or some form of greenery. A lot of companies and schools sponsor charities (Heart and Stroke Foundation, Breast Cancer, Cancer Society, Diabetes Society, Terry Fox, etc.) throughout the year. Items are sold, people are asked to donate funds or volunteer, people participate in charity runs/bike runs and these are usually huge events raising thousands and thousands of dollars. This is normally involves the entire community and it is voluntary to participate.
I think I'm familiar with all that, I live in UK not in some African village. :)
I used the word 'commercial'/mainstream and to me public interest in those days is still embarrassing compared to all the energy and money goes in celebrating and spreading V-day fluff.
Re: Why are muslim parents so concerned about little little things?
that solves the problem. Muslim parents should not have religious issues with it then....specially in UK eh?
So snogging on in this day should be fine since Quran doesn't say thou shalt not celebrate V-day, eh?
Its not about day, its about the underlying message and 'activities' that "our culture" tells us to perform on that day, one doesn't have to be a rocket scientist to see where V-day has the potential to go all wrong for Muslim kids. Kids won't stay in Dora cabdies and card stage forever.
Re: Why are muslim parents so concerned about little little things?
Perhaps stepping out of the house has a potential to go all wrong for kids. We should confine our kids to houses/room. in that way they will be become better Muslims :k:
Again same thing, lack of will to put effort with kids. Because it has a potential to go wrong, lets call it taboo but not put and effort to make sure that it does not go wrong.
Re: Why are muslim parents so concerned about little little things?
Another straw man jump.
Since you decided to be so vague and boring, let me add some weight and direction to your argument. So “stepping out of your house” to see a gang fight certainly has a potential for an individual to get shot, stabbed or arrested. Perhaps that’ll make my previous point little easier to understand.
Re: Why are muslim parents so concerned about little little things?
I/we don’t celebrate v-day at our household but we are not offended by it either and do not consider it the source of moral decay in the general society outside.
I also believe that kids eventually care about what their parents allow them to do or not … and if they have a loving relationship with their parents, will almost always, eventually, follow what their parents taught them to do/be.
In a nutshell, r e l a x. Celebrating or not celebrating v-day is not the end of the world. (Aur bhee dukh hain zamanay mein ghamay jana kay siva)
Re: Why are muslim parents so concerned about little little things?
Another straw man jump.
Since you're decided to be so vague and boring, let me add some weight to your argument. "stepping out of your house" to see a gang fight certainly has a potential for an individual to get shot, stabbed or arrested. Perhaps that'll make my previous point little easier to understand.
Unfortunately, that has only make my point little easier to understand. So has "potential to go out to see gang fight" stopped us from sending kids out? or we work around it and educate kid about it?
anyway, lets agree to disagree before you get more agitated :)
Re: Why are muslim parents so concerned about little little things?
Unfortunately, that has only make my point little easier to understand. So has "potential to go out to see gang fight" stopped us from sending kids out? or we work around it and educate kid about it?
anyway, lets agree to disagree before you get more agitated :)
No it still doesn't make sense. I'm sure you would not send your kid out if there is indeed a gang fight happening right in the middle of your street. Same with V-day parties and activities, you know exactly what kind of things can take place. Most parent would apply the better safe than sorry rule. Now I understand that there might be generation/cultural gap to consider in this concersation but I can tell you the V-day parties that I'd seen would be a worse nightmare for Muslim parents...and one doesn't have to be an Islamic scholar to draw the line.
And you're right, multitasking often gets the worst out of me so I need to stay away from posting here and concentrate on things I should be concertinaing on.
Re: Why are muslim parents so concerned about little little things?
Jolie, what is a V Day party? I have never in my life seen or attended one, nor did I see it happening in high school or any of the neighbouring schools.
Re: Why are muslim parents so concerned about little little things?
Jolie, what is a V Day party? I have never in my life seen or attended one, nor did I see it happening in high school or any of the neighbouring schools.
Dance/music date parties on V-day (most would be 'private' of course). I'd also the word 'party' as an euphemism for all the romantic activities that I'd witnessed on V day during my school/college/Uni days...just general hugging/kissing/asking out/bunking classes etc etc.
Re: Why are muslim parents so concerned about little little things?
And you're right, multitasking often gets the worst out of me so I need to stay away from posting here and concentrate on things I should be concertinaing on.
Dance/music date parties on V-day (most would be 'private' of course). I'd also the word 'party' as an euphemism for all the romantic activities that I'd witnessed on V day during my school/college/Uni days...just general hugging/kissing/asking out/bunking classes etc etc.
Re: Why are muslim parents so concerned about little little things?
I am not sure about that either. It does bug me at times because I grew up here and attended holiday parties with my friends and got Christmas gifts and celebrated birthday parties etc.. and I think I turned out fine. I think it's important for kids to learn about other cultures and open themselves for new things. It is important for parents to form a good foundation of religion and values at home so they can discuss their issues and concerns with parents when they are confused about something.
Re: Why are muslim parents so concerned about little little things?
abroad u ppl r in minority like us(indian muslims in india)...........
we do not send our kids to celebrate hindu festivals.........
few buy them crackers on diwali and pichkaari on holi.........
but still their children do not go and celebrate with hindus.....
though elders wish each others even some times invite each other for feast but still celebrating their festival with them is big nono.....
Hindu festivals have a proper religious significance to them. Holi and Diwali are celebrations that honor different gods and their escapades. Even then, it all depends on upon how you raise your children and what values you instill in them. And the only way to do that, is by example. My parents made a huge deal out of Eid...i loved it, I got money, clothes, toys....it's amazing fun. I went to school with Xmas gifts for my teachers, or goodie bags on Valentine's...but I didn't ever feel confused. My parents talked about these things with me. I knew what those holidays were and what they meant to other people.
Mother's Day, Valentine's Day, Thanksgiving, Christmas...they're not religious at all. (Yes, I wrote Xmas, it ain't religious the way it's celebrated in schools...or anywhere really) They're more just...for fun, that's how I always saw it. I never felt the need to be romantic or crushing on a guy on V-Day. Nor did I want to act out a nativity scene on Xmas. It really does depend on how you're raised. The more knowledgeable you are about something, the better decisions you make. And if parents decide to scare their kids away from everything, well they're gonna be curious at some point. That's where you get the whole lot of confused kids.
Re: Why are muslim parents so concerned about little little things?
I grew up sending and receiving valentines, singing xmas carols in school, particpating in the halloween parade, etc. My parents were new to Canada, didnt know what half the holidays were about and therefore we got to particpate innocently without bringing religion into it.
But then we grew up.
We knew the difference and the meanings behind the holidays and chose not to celebrate them. It may have been innocent fun as kids, but as teenagers - um, not so much. And even as a married couple, I don't celebrate it. Not a big deal. Hubby bought me roses a week before Valentines Day, which was sweet. I dont need a specific day where society tells me that hubby has to give me flowers. I'll take them any day :D
As for our own kids...I think it all depends on the environment they will be raised in. I'll make them send Valentines Day cards to their siblings, parents and grandparents if they want to participate in Valentine's Day.
Was watchign Grey's Anatomy last week and it had two kids (around 11-12) who were each other valentines and the boy was telling the girl that he loved her. . That, made me feel uncomfortable.
Re: Why are muslim parents so concerned about little little things?
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Was watchign Grey's Anatomy last week and it had two kids (around 11-12) who were each other valentines and the boy was telling the girl that he loved her. . That, made me feel uncomfortable.
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I was watched that episode and on t.v it was cute. I would be freaking out if it was my own child.
Going on a tangent here, but v day or no v day, all our 13 year olds one day are going to have crushes, their first love. We can shelter them all we want but that's not going to prevent them from developing feelings - liking or loving someone someday.
Re: Why are muslim parents so concerned about little little things?
yeah its cute for other people's kids, but not my own LOL :D
a crush is different than a first love. sure, we all had crushes when we were that age. but i think it is our responsibilty as parents to teach our kids how to act on our feelings.
(Aur bhee dukh hain zamanay mein ghamay jana kay siva)