Re: Who Initiates
Then why do some people have 10 kids :LB:? #justAsking](http://www.paklinks.com/gs/usertag.php?do=list&action=hash&hash=justAsking)
Re: Who Initiates
^Exactly.. positive experiences we tend to want to do over and over again..
There might be some aspects (or fetishes) people might try and think 'been there done that' but it certainly wouldn't apply to intimacy in general..
Re: Who Initiates
Can a man have sex with someone he does not love? Make it a pleasurable physical experience every time even if there isn't the initial love.
How is sex viewed by men and how is a wife seen when it comes to sex. She represents the future mother of his children and a woman that's Islamic and religious so a symbol of purity to him. That image combined with a wife being very sexual and actually enjoying it don't mix....is that the thinking behind this thinking that some men have?
Re: Who Initiates
Can a man have sex with someone he does not love? Make it an pleasurable physical experience every time even if there isn't the initial love.** YES**
How is sex viewed by men and how is a wife seen when it comes to sex. She represents the future mother of his children and a symbol of purity to him. That imagine combined a wife being very sexual and actually enjoying it don't mix....is that the thinking behind this thinking that some men have? NO. Nothing to do with mother of children.
in red.
Re: Who Initiates
in red.
I edited my post after you responded. But don't positive qualities of your mothers factor into how you choose a wife. Rarely have I seen a A man seeking divorce based on a sexless marriage if his wife is great in terms of everything else, he can marry another woman but getting a divorce based on that.
Re: Who Initiates
I edited my post after you responded. But don't positive quality of your mothers factor into how you choose a wife. Rarely have I seen a A man seeking divorce based on a sexless marriage if his wife is great in terms of everything else, he can marry another woman but getting a divorce based on that.
how would you know if a man divorced someone based on sexless marriage?
Re: Who Initiates
Can a man have sex with someone he does not love? Make it an pleasurable physical experience every time even if there isn't the initial love.
How is sex viewed by men and how is a wife seen when it comes to sex. She represents the future mother of his children and a woman that's Islamic and religious so a symbol of purity to him. That imagine combined a wife being very sexual and actually enjoying it don't mix....is that the thinking behind this thinking that some men have?
The short answer is yes.
The thing is, men tend to put their wives on a pedestal - which can backfire. Emotions during sex are for the weak - has alot to do with the release of dopamine and prolactin for men, fascinating stuff.
Re: Who Initiates
^Exactly.. positive experiences we tend to want to do over and over again..
There might be some aspects (or fetishes) people might try and think 'been there done that' but it certainly wouldn't apply to intimacy in general..
Agreed. Intimacy and sex are two seperate thing for me. Sex is just a mechanical act. Intimacy is bollywood Romeo and Juliet shyte. In my experience, when emotions start to creep in, it's time to move on to the next one.
Re: Who Initiates
Thats very interesting OP i've also heard the same even in western and white men. They all like the role of being masculine and initiating the strange thing i found is that even those who say they don't mind the girl initiating things usual have initiated things in their own relationships.
I don't think it's strange.. It's not uncommon for people to like different things at different times depending on their mood and so on, to sometimes want to be dominant and/or initiate and at other times to lay back and let the other person do it.. I would find it stranger (and quite offputting) if a person *always *wanted to be in the driving seat (so to speak lol)
It's definitely not true that they *all *like the role of being masculine and initiating.. Many of us who've been in those situations know otherwise..
Re: Who Initiates
Birth control hasn’t reached their part of the world yet.
Re: Who Initiates
I edited my post after you responded. But don't positive quality of your mothers factor into how you choose a wife. Rarely have I seen a A man seeking divorce based on a sexless marriage if his wife is great in terms of everything else, he can marry another woman but getting a divorce based on that.
Getting a divorce based on sexual needs not being fulfilled tends to be socially unacceptable.. As bad as it sounds the 'easier' option is often to just see someone else on the side.. or as you've said get another wife..
Re: Who Initiates
Can a man have sex with someone he does not love? Make it an pleasurable physical experience every time even if there isn't the initial love.
How is sex viewed by men and how is a wife seen when it comes to sex. She represents the future mother of his children and a woman that's Islamic and religious so a symbol of purity to him. That imagine combined a wife being very sexual and actually enjoying it don't mix....is that the thinking behind this thinking that some men have?
Man can intimate with anyone he does not love.
Intimacy is not an individual act. Both partner cooperate You sounds like if woman is more expressive in bed, then she would not be good mother.
Yeh kistarah ki batain hian... hamary dada par dada, forefathers sab yehi karty arahay hian... ager yeh log yeh karna chor dain to duna hi na chaly. Shadi karny ki aik wajah yeh bhi hoti hai kay halal tareeqay say apni khowahishat ko pora kiya jaye... ab iss main yeh kahna kay biwi ki desire ziydah hai. ager koi shaks istarah say sochta hia to woh banda shadi kay qabil nahi hia... shadi adult hi karty hian kion kay woh iss qabil hojatay hian kay mating kar sakian...
Re: Who Initiates
Man can intimate with anyone he does not love.
Intimacy is not an individual act. Both partner cooperate You sounds like if woman is more expressive in bed, then she would not be good mother. Yeh kistarah ki batain hian... hamary dada par dada, forefathers sab yehi karty arahay hian... ager yeh log yeh karna chor dain to duna hi na chaly. Shadi karny ki aik wajah yeh bhi hoti hai kay halal tareeqay say apni khowahishat ko pora kiya jaye... ab iss main yeh kahna kay biwi ki desire ziydah hai. ager koi shaks istarah say sochta hia to woh banda shadi kay qabil nahi hia... shadi adult hi karty hian kion kay woh iss qabil hojatay hian kay mating kar sakian...
dude u sound like noorclinic you admin there?
Re: Who Initiates
I don't think it's strange.. It's not uncommon for people to like different things at different times depending on their mood and so on, to sometimes want to be dominant and/or initiate and at other times to lay back and let the other person do it.. I would find it stranger (and quite offputting) if a person *always *wanted to be in the driving seat (so to speak lol)
It's definitely not true that they *all *like the role of being masculine and initiating.. Many of us who've been in those situations know otherwise..
You mean roleplay and Dominant and Slave thing? All that kinky stuff with whips n watnot? Damn!
Re: Who Initiates
Getting a divorce based on sexual needs not being fulfilled tends to be socially unacceptable.. As bad as it sounds the 'easier' option is often to just see someone else on the side.. or as you've said get another wife..
I think there is alot you can do to become sexually compatible - but if at the end of an adjustment period it still isn't working, it may be time for a second wife. For the woman, she should just ask for Khula if she isn't satisfied instead of stepping outside of marriage. I do not condone stepping outside of marriage - Allah has given us the mechanisms to have our cake and eat in a halal way.
Re: Who Initiates
dude u sound like noorclinic you admin there?
No. mainy urdu main woh baat likhi hai jo app log english main likh rahay hian.. mujhy urdu main ziydah monasib laga.
Re: Who Initiates
This sounds like BDSM… 
Re: Who Initiates
I didn't mean that, Gupshupper.. I meant dominant as in taking the lead (speaking metaphorically of course)
Re: Who Initiates
Agreed. Intimacy and sex are two seperate thing for me. Sex is just a mechanical act. Intimacy is bollywood Romeo and Juliet shyte. In my experience, when emotions start to creep in, it's time to move on to the next one.
I would think for most women sex is very emotional especially the first time. Consummating a marriage, a special bond like that, is emotional for both men and women what kind robotic inhuman person would have sex based only on physical need. Atleast one person will get hurt finding out that there is no love with all that sex.
So why can't those men that think the way I mentioned in my first post, see that sex is emotional for women and that if she initiates it's for love and not because she's slept around. It's because it's seen as some sort of animal physical pleasure I guess and that's why this thinking.
Re: Who Initiates
There shouldn’t be any set rules on ‘who’?
@~MuNiYa~](http://www.paklinks.com/gs/members/-muniya-/) is right, mian/biwi are naturally on a comfortable wavelength with one another for the most part