Re: what would a good husband do in these situations...
how many of these advisors are married, or atleast have/have had a significant other?
How many of the single advisers and those who are are married are on the same page with their advice?
Re: what would a good husband do in these situations...
hard to say until we tally up both sides. my guess is once the single folks with their black and white views stop dominating, the married folk'd admit to a lot more compromises than we see currently.. which side are you on, rv pal?
Re: what would a good husband do in these situations...
You're both wrong, the answer is 42. If you don't believe me, Google: "the answer to life the universe and everything".
Re: what would a good husband do in these situations...
rv pal?
Queer Aapi, I sympathize with the OP for having to move to Pak. Huge change. I think that her MIL can be unreasonable at times. I'll sympathize there as well. However, I've also seen her whine and complain in several threads over little/petty things (and she knows they're petty)...and I don't sympathize there...because in some ways she makes life difficult for her own self. So that said, which side do you think I'm on?
I don't think I'm really on one side or the other. I think Nadz, if she knows where her faults lie, needs to work on those areas so that she can make her life more easier. I mean seriously, if she acknowledges that it's silly for her to expect her husband to speak to her each time he heads off to take a leak/dump....then why not just let it go? That would be one less headache for her (and a self-imposed one at that).
Re: what would a good husband do in these situations...
You don hav to change 360 degrees but dont get on ur husbands nerves too much. Give him his deserved space and try to keep ur head busy with other things n activities. If he is tolerating it now doesnt mean he would for too long. I know it must b hard for you but just try to swallow it off for a while n at times do throw tantrums, but keep a balance dont over do either of them. Dont be a kurbani ka bakra either n dont be a tantrums queen also lmao.
Re: what would a good husband do in these situations...
wife is being mouthy, not listening to advice, wanting her own way, -
wife cries ALL the time...( every night)- OVER silly things like you didnt talk to me when u passed the bedroom to go the toilet....etc
and sometimes bigger things like i wana go home..( uk)
ok so we sussed its me, the wife, hes being veryyyyyyyyyyyyyyy patient.....i understand his views, his reasons, plus he alaywas said he would live with his mum dad in pak, now cos of me, he says his plans will change and in 3 or 4 years we will go back so our daughter can have her education there...i should be pleased. right?
SERIOUSLY- I THINK hes great. however i still feel like he should od whatever i say...:
a) Don't beat yourself over being this way. Yes, it doesn't serve any purpose and doesn't work for either one of you, but it is ok. You are being a little annoying (for sure) but you're not going out hurting someone intentionally. Accept that this is how you feel and this is how you are. Accept yourself for being this way.
b) Once you have made peace with it and you're not beating yourself over it, ask yourself this question "What do I gain from acting this way [if you have a term that you use for being this way, use that]?" And then be curious for the answer, again don't beat yourself over for it. You will have an answer for yourself.
c) After you have an answer, ask yourself this "What can I do to make this better for myself?" Again, you'll get an answer.
d) Try to follow through with that. You might wanna let your husband know and get his support in doing that. BUT
e) Ask him to not be super nice to you when you act this way. Ask him to hold you accountable and don't treat you (in essence) like a little girl who can't handle these difficult feelings. That will be difficult for you, but honestly, when you have to deal with them on your own (which you CAN), you'll hate yourself and him (and possibly me), but that is the only thing that will PUSH you to do the right thing.
The best thing a husband can do for his wife in this situation is to toughen up. It would be easiest if you decide to do it before he toughens up, but him being super understanding is not helping; neither you nor him.
Good luck! You can do it.
Re: what would a good husband do in these situations...
b) "What do I gain from acting this way [if you have a term that you use for being this way, use that]?"
Uh...what term would that be, Amoureux?
Re: what would a good husband do in these situations...
^I would rather not term it. People have their own way of referring to things that make sense to them and hold meaning for them.
Re: what would a good husband do in these situations…
^ 
I know, I was just teasing.
Re: what would a good husband do in these situations...
You're both wrong, the answer is 42. If you don't believe me, Google: "the answer to life the universe and everything".
Hahahah. Oh I love Douglas Adams.
Re: what would a good husband do in these situations...
I honestly cannot stand whiny people...and women who cry all the time? The worst. My exes mother was like that, always crying when she wanted something, because at the age of 55 she still had not learned to communicate her feelings like an adult. And I would want to shake her and tell her snap out of it!!
My point is, if you continue thus behaviour, at some point this loving husband of yours will stop believing you when you are emotionally hurting for real, because you happen to cry for everything. And he will stop treating you like the adult you deserve to be treated like because you are acting like a child.
I understand that you moved t Pak from the UK and that is a hard adjustment for anyone. But thats life right now, so why not at least try to make the most out of it? You know you will be there for another few years, do you plan on crying all that time? At least try to get close to your in laws and maybe try to meet some other women your age? Are there not some classes you could take or a common nursery you can bring your child too and meet other mothers?
Re: what would a good husband do in these situations...
Your pushing him and you want to see how far he'll go. The day he snaps, you'll feel complete.
Re: what would a good husband do in these situations...
A good husband would send you to therapy every day.
Re: what would a good husband do in these situations…
Was that a smart ass reply? Not very Mod-like of you :nono:
Re: what would a good husband do in these situations…
Aww…there there…
Im pretty sure Nadz knows and realizes her behavior is out of line. She knows she is being unreasonable. This is not rocket science…your husband doesnt need to have a consultation with you before using the restroom.
Re: what would a good husband do in these situations…
Why are you not president of the world? 'Tis a shame. 
Re: what would a good husband do in these situations...
he says his plans will change and in 3 or 4 years we will go back so our daughter can have her education there...i should be pleased. right?
You should be, because those plans have nothing to do with your daughter's education.
Re: what would a good husband do in these situations…
Phew! Reasonable advice. What would GS be coming to if* Reha* was trolling?! That should be reserved for Nomi and CM
Re: what would a good husband do in these situations...
The start reading material about the HOORS, promised in life after.
Re: what would a good husband do in these situations…
Mucking hell! Some love for Nadz in here!
I love you Nadz, nobody rocks this place like you do.
