Upset..need advice

Lifestyle Relationships
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Re: Upset..need advice

That I agree, in fact a big promoter of resolution throough dialogue.

Recording the conversation Idea could backfire on her

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Re: Upset..need advice

the SIL needs theraphy she isgoing thru her divorce and just cant bear the sight of a happy married cpl

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Re: Upset..need advice

as much as we give the benefit of doubt to Chameli420 (original poster) how can we be certain that SIL is all at fault and pass a verdict that she needs therapy

It could be that Chameli420 is misunderstanding her SIL. Maybe SIL is not comfortable talking to her about leaving her kids, though you have to understand that she is comfortable with her in leaving her kids with Chameli. That is pretty +ve point

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Re: Upset..need advice

aap to apni baji ki side laina hi thee na
:hoonh:

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Re: Upset..need advice

Life is all about being on right side at the right time

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Re: Upset..need advice

mujy kisi ki zaroorat nahee

kisi ki side ki

everyone can …

:snooty:

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Re: Upset..need advice

^^ West side is better then east side, just to let you know

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Re: Upset..need advice

chameli
how old is your sil's kid?
And are you supposed to take
care of him or does your husband
when the kid is left at your place?

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Re: Upset..need advice

The only way your husband will trust you with anything you say about his sister, is if he really trusts that you have his sister's best interest at heart. If you bring up the whole babysitting issue abruptly, he's just going to think that you just dont like his sister and the kid. Just be patient. Also, dont let her get to you. I know its easier sid than done, but sooner you learn to accept her rude behavior, the sooner you'll start feeling better. Stop fighting about it, and bothering yourself about it.
Just make sure she doesnt turn your hubby against you. She is divorced, which is unfortunate, but women are weird, no matter how much she might not want to, she is going to feel jealous of another woman happily married. Keep that in mind when dealing with her. She might be taking avantage of the her sad situation, but you have to realise that the situation indeed is sad.
Just be careful, these kinda situations are really fragile. How you handle this situation now, will truly efffect the rest of your married life.

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Re: Upset..need advice

please dont joke about Allah SWT/ His will, etc. There r other topics to joke about but this one is off limits....

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Re: Upset..need advice

ditto...:D

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Re: Upset..need advice

huh? what? English comprehension is not your forte, is it?

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Re: Upset..need advice

:konfused:

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Re: Upset..need advice

that was my question as well....still waiting for her to respond

it's an important question 2.

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Re: Upset..need advice

In my humble opinion Kindness works every time,

Find a Husband for your Sister in Law.

She will be for ever grateful........:)

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Re: Upset..need advice

and if that doesnt work out...the SIL will forever blame her for it.

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Re: Upset..need advice

Mr Frauds thats like the weirdest thing I have heard:rolleyes:…also can I mention Illegal too.
What this shows that the communication has ended and other tactics are required.

And Chamelli I would suggest a conversation with your husband and your sister in law present like adults is a better option.Prepare what you want to talk to them about in a concise manner and list your concerns as honestly without making others defensive or trying to put blame on others etc.The thing I am saying is try to present it as nuetrallyas possible and also donot expect answers or crtain things like you know maybe your husband coming for your rescue..as with your experience you know you would be setting yourself up for failure.Again clear and concise with all the parties affected present.See how it goes.:)…at least later if it doesnt go well ..u know in your heart of hearts know that you tried your best.

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Re: Upset..need advice

ask99

when sensible suggestions are not followed, weird ones follow.

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Re: Upset..need advice

...or we can say that women are women!

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Re: Upset..need advice

Chameli -- patience is a virtue. u need to be patient as these kinda matters need time n cannot be solved right away esp when your husband is not the one who would support you in all kind of circumstances. I know its hard to accept but this is the way it is, and the sooner you accept it , the better. its not been long since u have been married and from waht i ve seen that initial few years for some gurls are very troublesome one way or the other.

I wouldnt recoomend u to confront ur SIL or say sumthing against her.There might be a chance dat ur hubby notices it all but he may deny it in front of you.u will hafta think logically instead of emotionally. next time ur SIL drops her child to ur home tell ur hubby that u were planning to spend this time only with him n how u both have missed some quality time together caz ur SIL dint inform earlier. u can also say u had to go shopping to buy presents for him/ Sil/MIL or u planned to cook sumthing special for him

NEVER say sumthing against ur in-laws. just INFORM ur hubby waht they said/ did in a neutral tone caz in the end he s the one who has to take a stand . there s nothing much u can do until or unless u have 100 percent of ur hubbys support. ur SIL can never drop her child if ur husband doesnt allow her too and this can only happen if he understands ur other engagements n commitements. this way he ll be the one to refuse n it wont make u look bad infront of ur SIL or in -laws