Re: ‘tum’ yaa ‘aap’
RagoN maiN doRtaY phirnaY kaY hum naheeN Qaail
Jub aankh hee say naa tapkaY tau Lahu kiYaa hai?
har baat pe kehtaY ho kay Tu kiYaa hai
Tum hee batlaao kay yeh andaaz-e-guftugoo kiYaa hai 
???
Re: 'tum' yaa 'aap'
larki
u are correct, urdu is a beautiful language, sadly many people do not speak it properly.
Re: 'tum' yaa 'aap'
If she doesnt mean any disrespect then guy is just a pompus goat. This way she will really respect him ? More likely she mutters some well deserving compliments.
Re: 'tum' yaa 'aap'
I would not be bothered if she calls me 'aap' for a certain amount of time initially but would prefer 'tum'.
How about calling her 'oye' in response to her 'aaps' That should convey the message. I hope I dont get that thick headed a person who wont get it even if I tell her.
Re: 'tum' yaa 'aap'
I never speak in English if I dont need to. and I talk to my fiance only in English or Arabic!
Re: 'tum' yaa 'aap'
i say, "tum" and "bola"..i didnt know it was disrespectful????
Re: 'tum' yaa 'aap'
'aap' connotes respect and formality. 'tum' connotes informality, and depending on the context, disrespect. For elders, the convention is to use 'aap'.
I use 'aap' with everyone. It's a habit, and it's a good habit.
In my lingo usage, 'tum' always precedes an expletive. For excample, 'tum' majestic ho!
Well I hope you get the concept. :D
Re: 'tum' yaa 'aap'
It's Aap, Tum and Tu:
Older/Senior/Proper/Respectful: Aap
Same age/Formal friend/Informal address: Tum
Younger/Personal/Close child/Kidding: Tu
Re: ‘tum’ yaa ‘aap’
i didnt know ppl would get really mad if you called them tum.
Re: ‘tum’ yaa ‘aap’
your fiancé knows arabic?
Re: 'tum' yaa 'aap'
^^ Yeah, kashmiris speak Arabic, dont u know? Espeicially the ones 'trained' by ISI in pakistan :D
Re: ‘tum’ yaa ‘aap’
what’s ISI?
Re: 'tum' yaa 'aap'
^ the ISI is the pakistani secret service. and larki he speaks arabic b/c he used to go to an islamic school and thats how he knows arabic.
Re: ‘tum’ yaa ‘aap’
he is not a fob. never been to pakistani and neither has his parents. Now get off my case.
Re: ‘tum’ yaa ‘aap’
^ who/what is a fob
Re: ‘tum’ yaa ‘aap’
aap and hum all the way. unless im potohari maar-ing. In which case it all gets a bit confused 
Re: 'tum' yaa 'aap'
Funny how this topic should come up now.....
In the past three months I have had two occassions to visit the same desi restaurant. Once we ate in and the second time around I called in the order and went to pick it up.
When the attendand who took the order told me that the food would be ready by 7 pm, I asked him to be sure because I didn't want to wait around. He chuckled a little bit and said, "Koi baat nahin, thora yahan intezar kar laina". This was the extent of any non-business-related conversation that I have EVER had with this individual.
I arrived to pick up my food, had to wait about three minutes for him to pack it up and then asked for a menu to keep at home as I had forgotten the phone number. Before I could reach the holder, he grabbed a menu and started scribbling on it. As I was saying thank you, he said, "Main nay apna naam bhi likh diya hai taakay tum bhoolo na".
I wanted to deck the guy!
How dare he refer to me as "tum"! Hell, we were not even acquaintances!
I was still steaming when I got home and though to call up the owner of the place and ask him to teach his crew some manners.
Maybe I took it too seriously, but it really rubbed me the wrong way.
Re: 'tum' yaa 'aap'
Muzna, was he a native Urdu speaker? I would give him benefit of the doubt. At least he did’t say Tu.
You missed your opportunity to say to him “Tum koi Bholnay wali Cheeze ho”?
Re: 'tum' yaa 'aap'
The guy might be an Indian from Bombay most likely...
They use tum as aap and tu as tum...
This Bombay guy I used to work with, from the first day called me tum, but he was a Hindu...Very nice guy...I started calling him 'tum' after a while, but he started off with tum...It was never out of disrespect though...