To women who would want a divorce just because husband takes another wife

[Princess1983]

Re: To women who would want a divorce just because husband takes another wife

@tranquil

I know someone who recently became a second wife. the guy didn’t like his first wife much and kept complaining to the second wife ( girl friend) at the time) that he was sick of her. he helped the second wife( girl friend back then) **get a divorce since she was married to a man **with a mental illness and he didn’t want to be cured and was abusive towards her and her child as well.

he bought the second wife her own apartment and something tells me the first wife isn’t getting too many visits from him anymore. i know for a fact that she was extremely unhappy with the whole second marriage situation but she consented because she would have been given the boot if she hadn’t.

now the guy thinks he did nothing wrong at all, in fact he earned sawab by marrying a young helpless girl who was stuck in a bad marriage ; but to me he emotionally cheated on his first wife and earned a whole lot of gunah during the whole process.

poor first wife; i really feel for her and her children.

Good grief. So let me get this straight. They were both already married and she agreed to marry him knowing he was slagging off the first wife to her? Saying he didn’t like her much but still managed to pro-create with her?

So the first wife is getting visited less? Does he see the kids often (more than the wife). At a guess soon enough the visits will become less and less. Even if the bloke said at the start (not sure if he did) that he would support both it’s near impossible if he didn’t even like the first wife much. Why not do the right thing and instead of stringing her along explain his feelings and if they cannot sort it part rather than her being unhappy? He’d still have to financially support his kids if that is something she is worried about. Zulm is not acceptable; even if it’s just her being unhappy because her hands were tied to accept such a decision.

The first wife is in the dilemma of many first wives-if you don’t accept the decision you are kicked to the kerb as often the kids are too because shiny new ones will take their place soon enough.

He helped a married women basically leave her valid nikkah, and marry him and he doesn’t see that as wrong? The right thing possibly for the brother would have been is to say “I like you I really do; however you are in a nikkah with another man even if he has got mental problems. If you become single call me!”. But oh no why do that.