It’s interesting that you say that, because I take like 2 hours getting ready…. Yes I’m a hijabi and modesty is the first thing I think of when choosing an outfit. BUT that doesn’t mean I also don’t think fashion. When I go out into the public I do like people to look at me, but as an example for non-Muslims that what you see on TV is false and Muslim women are not suppressed and I choose to wear my hijab and I LOVE IT. And an example for Muslim girls wanting to wear hijab but may not have the courage, that you can wear it AND look good.
I’m not gonna lie, when I first started, I made some not-so modest choices, but with time you learn the power of hijab and that to be a hijabi you don’t have to sacrifice your fashion sense.
Sometimes people, specially guys change after marriage.. some turn towards religion for peace. And THEN they might ask their wife to wear hijab etc. plausible?
Yes, it's plausible but if it took time for him to find religion he should understand that it could take time for her as well.. Imo it's quite selfish to turn around and say 'I'm religious now so you need to be too.'
There should never be compulsion in religion. When two people decide to get married the very first thing that should be discussed is religion. The two should be compatible in this regard. Unfortunately alot of people forget to have this conversation. A guy should not marry a woman if he doesn't like her wearing hijab or doesn't understand/respect it. On the other hand a guy should not marry a woman who doesn't wear hijab if he thinks its necessary.
As far as changes coming after marriage than I believe the two should learn and change together. Isn't that marriage? If a husband is starting to become more religious - he should start passing that knowledge onto his wife and vice versa. That way the two are growing in the same direction together. If that doesn't happen than the husband or wife should not expect their partner to change over might and give them time to understand something like hijab on their own terms.
PS. lets not turn this into hijabi vs non-hijabi women.
Yes, it's plausible but if it took time for him to find religion he should understand that it could take time for her as well.. Imo it's quite selfish to turn around and say 'I'm religious now so you need to be too.'
Yeah You are right but unfortunately it doesnt work that way. In our culture, sometimes when a man finds hidaya, he would wanna apply the changes to every member of his family and specially to his wife.
a couple should understand that two people can never be at the same spiritual level and ppl go through highs and lows as far as being religious is concerned.
Yes the husband would be gaining ultimate sawab if he reminds his wife of namaz, reciting Quran or in general just discuss Islamic issues etc but it's best that as far as hijab etc goes he should let his wife decide when she ultimately wants to start wearing it.
The wife meanwhile should try her best to dress modestly and at least start with avoiding revealing, fitted clothes etc. Let her influence and her heart get ready for the hijab itself. And when that happens, it would be there to stay not just a mere fashion/change fling. :)
Yeah You are right but unfortunately it doesnt work that way. In our culture, sometimes when a man finds hidaya, he would wanna apply the changes to every member of his family and specially to his wife.
That's precisely the problem. Culture, not that everything about culture is a problem BUT in Islam there is no compulsion. So if a husband does become more aware of deen he should slowly teach his family members (including wife) and not demand things to be done right away.
To hijabans: How would you take it if your husband/fiance asks you to take off your hijab?
and non hijabans: Would you be able to adjust if you were asked to wear a hijab?
I have seen hell broke loose when second situation happened specially.
Hijab is something that is a part of me. Like BarbieCue said, he wouldn't be my fiance if he doesn't allow me to wear my hijab. If my husband one day asks me that (hope never!), i'd calmly explain him why i believe it's important and that i would be very upset by his request.
That's precisely the problem. Culture, not that everything about culture is a problem BUT in Islam there is no compulsion. So if a husband does become more aware of deen he should slowly teach his family members (including wife) and not demand things to be done right away.
It is more of a cultural thing though. You are right. For example, full veil and hijab with hands and eyes covered in saudia is more down to their tribal origins and norms.. not religion.
1.if you were a hijabi…you girls would want that your husband listen to your islamic arguments/reasoning and then allow you to do it…since you proved it, alongwith religious evidence…
2.If you weren’t a hijabi… you would yourself NOT listen to HIS islamic arguments/reasoning and then do it…since HE proved it, alongwith religious evidence…
Nope there is no contradiction why? because again there is NO compulsion in Islam. The actual topic here is hijab and who is wearing the hijab? the woman. Therefore, her husband can’t force her but he should teach her about why its important (if she doesn’t know). The two should work on the issue together without any force. No one can ask others to do something against Islam so husband can’t ask his wife to remove the hijab.
1.if you were a hijabi........you girls would want that your husband listen to your islamic arguments/reasoning and then allow you to do it....since you proved it, alongwith religious evidence..........
2.If you weren't a hijabi............. you would yourself NOT listen to HIS islamic arguments/reasoning and then do it....since HE proved it, alongwith religious evidence..........
you don't see the clear contradiction??
Nomi nobody is saying we won't listen to his islamic arguments/reasoning. Nobody is denying the importance of hijab/pardah in Islam as well as its proof. But if somebody wants hijab to be there for good and for long it should be accepted wholeheartedly and only when somebody is fully convinced they want to do it. And the husband should keep encouraging his wife but not force it on her because the point of hijab isn't just a headscarf but a lot lot more.
Nope there is no contradiction why? because again there is NO compulsion in Islam. The actual topic here is hijab and who is wearing the hijab? the woman. Therefore, her husband can't force her but he should teach her about why its important (if she doesn't know). The two should work on the issue together without any force. No one can ask others to do something against Islam so husband can't ask his wife to remove the hijab.
Nomi nobody is saying we won't listen to his islamic arguments/reasoning. Nobody is denying the importance of hijab/pardah in Islam as well as its proof. But if somebody wants hijab to be there for good and for long it should be accepted wholeheartedly and only when somebody is fully convinced they want to do it. And the husband should keep encouraging his wife but not force it on her because the point of hijab isn't just a headscarf but a lot lot more.
so if the hubby decides to become a full time molvie........with long beard, wearing pants above ankles n wearing a pagree.............. women shouldn't have any issue with that right???
so if the hubby decides to become a full time molvie........with long beard, wearing pants above ankles n wearing a pagree.............. women shouldn't have any issue with that right???
that cannot be an overnight transition. It would occur over a period of time and hopefully till then the woman has increased her spirituality to accept the beard and am sure *that *would be a mutual decision by then as beard etc is Sunnah.
that cannot be an overnight transition. It would occur over a period of time and hopefully till then the woman has increased her spirituality to accept the beard and am sure *that *would be a mutual decision by then as beard etc is Sunnah.
so if a guy wants to go religious (lets assume regardless of duration of transition).......it should be mutual?? so.......that is not the ''guy's'' decision to make???
so if a guy wants to go religious (lets assume regardless of duration of transition).......it should be mutual?? so.......that is not the ''guy's'' decision to make???
I thought the question was about having a beard and wearing pants above ankles and not about being religious on the whole?
like I said for both cases if it's about outlook, it should be accepted and encouraged from both sides when both are completely and wholeheartedly willing to do so. Either a woman wearing hijab or a man keeping a beard
so if the hubby decides to become a full time molvie........with long beard, wearing pants above ankles n wearing a pagree.............. women shouldn't have any issue with that right???
I strongly believe that the husband and wife should grow and learn together. So if the husband or wife starts getting more inclined towards religion they should encourage the other partner. This way there is no big shocks or disagreements. Obviously no two people will be on the exact same page but Islam teaches one to be humble, patient and understanding. I would hope and pray the partner whose faith is stronger would show these qualities for the other and help them achieve them too. This is a marriage we are talking about, a partnership not a competition. Both parties have to work on things equally hard. Sometimes one give and other takes and vice versa.
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