To hijabans and non hijabans

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To hijabans: How would you take it if your husband/fiance asks you to take off your hijab?

and non hijabans: Would you be able to adjust if you were asked to wear a hijab?

I have seen hell broke loose when second situation happened specially.

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Re: To hijabans and non hijabans

im a nonhijabi

and i would say this is something that u discuss with each other before getting married.... if you dont believe in hijaab and ur being forced into it thats not islamic either....

i dont think i would be able to adjust at all ....

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Re: To hijabans and non hijabans

So are these suggestions or requirements from a partner?

If these are requirements all hell should break lose in either one of these situations.

Situation 1: Unless you have some god given prophecy's, which is never going to happen, so there is no logical reasoning to asking your partner to remove her hijab. If you don't like it, there's other fish in the sea. My reaction would be accept me or keep swimming.

Situation 2: As a partner you can express your views on hijab, but asking your wife to start covering and not taking into consideration where she stands on her beliefs is selfish. To think that another human must act like and behave in-terms of* your *happiness is a slight level of shirk. So my reaction would be for him to enlighten himself a little more on Islam, before preaching.

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Re: To hijabans and non hijabans

you girls are so stubborn! A relationship needs flexibility and compromise! hmph :snooty:

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Re: To hijabans and non hijabans

When it comes to religion, I don't think anyone should have to compromise their beliefs.

You can compromise in all other parts of a relationship.

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Re: To hijabans and non hijabans

Well, there's are big difference between requesting and forcing. If it's a REQUEST, then yes I would wear it. I think a little encouragement for a big step like this goes a long way. We all need a little motivation sometimes.

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Re: To hijabans and non hijabans

Depends on how the spouse asks. There are ways to ask things/convey your thoughts; you want from your SO. If one suggests/asks politely, giving reasons that make sense, then I wouldn't mind going for a Hijab.

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Re: To hijabans and non hijabans

I would not take off my Hijab, sorry no compromise on religion. Plus i doubt my husband would ever tell me to take it off!

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Re: To hijabans and non hijabans

**my two cents:

Firstly, question about women taking of their hijaab for their husbands is alright but since there is *no allowance or concept of having fiance in Islam, the *question is NOT even valid**. Islam doesn't allow to give fiance any extra legal rights over woman.

secondly, ask this question to men as well:

***would you OR would you NOT ever ask ur wife to take off her hijaab for good? give ur reasons.*

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Re: To hijabans and non hijabans

  1. If I wore a hijab willingly and my husband asked me to take it off, he'd be asking me to do something that is against the fardh of Islam. I would enlighten him and perhaps have him communicate with an aalim about this.
  2. If I don't wear a hijab and my husband asks me to wear it, I'd try to see where he is coming from...perhaps he's had a change of mindset, perhaps he feels a strong need for us to be on the same page [given that he is a practicing muslim with a daaRi and all], or whatever, and try to work towards it.
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Re: To hijabans and non hijabans

I won't be making him my fiance/husband before discussing these issues very frankly with him. Mere hijab se apko sharam ati hai tau chalte bano bhai jaan. :p

I have already been asked to take it off by some of my family members.. especially on my sister's wedding... the reason being "you're wearing a saree, and a hijab doesn't go with a saree"... ermm yeah not a valid enough reason.

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Re: To hijabans and non hijabans

1) no

2) no

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Re: To hijabans and non hijabans

^ditto.

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I wear a hijab and if my husband asked me to take it off I would be like why? Then whatever reason he gave I would open the Quran and show him that whatever reasoning he has is wrong and why women have to wear hijabs.

If I didn't wear a hijab and my husband asked me to I would simply say that I will Inshallah wear a hijab and not because he is requesting me to but when Allah will allow me to wear one when it's right in my life. But if he sad it in a Islamic point I would consider it because maybe he's just being a proper muslim husband and reminding me about our religion.

But some people may feel more strongly about it and yeah it's true that all of this should be talked about before marriage so you can see what his opinion is on these matters especially religion in which there isn't much space for compromise.

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Re: To hijabans and non hijabans

I don't wear a hijab myself. And it's nothing to be proud of. But somehow I still have to overcome that fear when I would be able to wear it wholeheartedly and not worry about going on shadis, family gatherings with it IA.

  1. IF my husband had asked me to take it off in the case when I was a hijabi, I would have clearly stated that what he is asking is something that is going against the teachings of Islam. I could however adapt in such a way to observe hijab by adapting to a headscarf or dupatta on the head (whatever middle ground hubby was ok with). But in most cases I have sadly seen girls who were a very strict hijabi but after a few months of marriage gave it up completely because their husbands didn't like it. I guess influence of the in laws and husband does play an important part.

  2. For the second case, I wouldn't immediately start wearing it but knowing what he wants is in accordance with Quran, I would at least make an effort to start covering my head in public places such as shopping malls etc. But this would all come gradually! What matters is the way the guy asks...not forcing it but suggesting or requesting it makes more sense to me.

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Re: To hijabans and non hijabans

tell me abt it...i've gone thru the same n always hav to.... i mean y do people hav problem with hijab i dont understand..

i would never remove hijab even if asked by my husband....in islam if even ur parents ask u to go against islamic laws u dont hav to obey them (this doesnt mean disrespecting or insulting them)

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Re: To hijabans and non hijabans

Usually, I'm indecisive. But when I make a decision, it's full of conviction. So him asking me to change from hijabi to non-hijabi or vice versa wouldn't fly well. Would definitely discuss this issue before marriage even if we are both on the same page at the time because people and their views can always change.

It's not easy wearing a hijab and it's a matter of individuality too. There should be little wonder if hell breaks loose. It's not like the adjustment that comes with switching from Tide to Purex. But it's hard for men to be empathetic in general, let alone on an issue that will never affect their own lifestyle.

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Re: To hijabans and non hijabans

yeah that should take care of the situation. bhaijaan keh diya tu na nikaah rehna hai na engagement! :smack:

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Re: To hijabans and non hijabans

So its alright if he requests you? rather than force you? would you consider or just give in to the request?

majority of guppans are kinda firm in this regard.. nahice!

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Re: To hijabans and non hijabans

to most women...request, force, same thing when it comes to wearing or not wearing hijab. :D