Re: The moving out of the in-laws house conversation
I would welcome that, someone else doing the work for me. In fact why would I even be making my husbands lunch for him, why can’t he make his own?
Does… her 35 year old daughter live at home?
Re: The moving out of the in-laws house conversation
Now the question I have is do MILs have a forum to ***** about the DILs? I think that would be important in 20 years when you all have your kids married off 
You know what I would pay good money for someone to keep track of these posts and then point out any issues of hypocrisy in 20 to 30 years.
Re: The moving out of the in-laws house conversation
When you say ‘good money’ what are we talking about? $$$ or $$$$$ or $$$$$$$? Maybe I will chip in.
Re: The moving out of the in-laws house conversation
If you can do it I will pay whatever you want. Nothing would amuse me more than seeing the change from DIL to MIL for most of these people.
Re: The moving out of the in-laws house conversation
So what happened?
Re: The moving out of the in-laws house conversation
well…we’ve seen the change in many people that were here in their late teens and early twenties…they’re all married with kids now so what you’re suggesting is not all that unlikely.
you can send your $$$$ to the peer of dhump.
Re: The moving out of the in-laws house conversation
Women nowadays who have other ‘distractions’ (and can look after themselves better) are less likely to become so overly attached imo, to the point where they can’t bear their grown up children leaving home.. I would never want to be emotionally, physically or financially dependent and I’m sure Inspi doesn’t either.. the expectation is less likely to be there in comparison to previous generations.. I’m sure she won’t be throwing a tantrum when the time comes for her own future kids to move out of home or being a hypocrite and expecting her son to live with her..
Funny how the subject of living with inlaws seems to rub some people up the wrong way :D"Making her husband move out of Mummy and Daddy’s house?!! How dare she!"
Expect more passive-aggressive posts and threads..
Re: The moving out of the in-laws house conversation
So husband bought it up finally, explaining that due to my job and the hospital requiring my oncalls to be twice a week and we have to be 15 mins from hosp that it males sense to us to find a crash pad downtown, and this is temporary which it honestly actually is and that we will not just leave them and never come back and its essential for my job.
Father in law supported us fully and said this is the only way that will work for me and husband and we are making the right decision
Mother in law has been crying for 3 days and saying shes going kill herself if we leave.
Re: The moving out of the in-laws house conversation
Kill herself?!? Damn the thing is she is old & when old people take a stand on something they are annoyingly rigid. Have heart to heart with her & let her know its temporary & that u r planning a future with them n ur future kids in their house instead of some apartment downtown. Basically reassure her personally!
Hope it helps
Re: The moving out of the in-laws house conversation
Ah…good to see everyone is handling this like a mature adult.
So when are you supposed to start work?
Do two hours drive everyday or come back to your crash pad and cook and clean and do laundry for two hours everyday? That is the question.
Re: The moving out of the in-laws house conversation
Leave, trust me. She won’t kill herself. Instinct to live is way way too strong. Such a drama queen like every other desi mom
Re: The moving out of the in-laws house conversation
Who said she won’t have to do laundry and cleaning if she lives with in laws?
Kar lo juda ek maan ko oos ke betay se aur khush ho jaao 
Re: The moving out of the in-laws house conversation
Yep. While planning the wedding, my MIL was upset about a issue and kept saying for MONTHS how if hubby/I go through with it, it will kill her. That was a few years ago. Wedding came and went. MIL still very much alive. :hinna:
Re: The moving out of the in-laws house conversation
Lol TLK, main judda kar rahi hoon?
The moving out of the in-laws house conversation
My mother in law done a similar drama lol but they get over it, it is just an empty threat (hopefully inshallah) once you move away she will come around to the idea.
Re: The moving out of the in-laws house conversation
Everyone in here talking about, and being, so considerate around others’ behaviours makes me very aware of the fact that I’m kind of a d*ck. Kudos to you guys for having so much patience. I would make a terrible DIL. 
Re: The moving out of the in-laws house conversation
Things have settled much more now thank god. Crying stopped yesterday from mother in law and normal conversation seems to have resumed, however she is still talking to herself in a morbid manner when sitting alone.
Both husband and I are looking at places with sunken hearts as we aren’t enjoying this moment as we imagined we would, we discussed it today and realised that this milestone we are taking, is a joyous moment but we are not making it with the full blessing of both his parents.
I want to somehow involve her in us moving but husband says its a bad idea and is just rubbing salt in the wounds?
Re: The moving out of the in-laws house conversation
Your husband is correct that its a BAD idea. Asking her to help in this move (at least at this point) will only lead to more emotional outbursts/tension for EVERYONE involved.
You MIL is learning that tantrums and emotional blackmail will not work on her son/husband/daughter and DIL (i.e. you). You and your husband are learning that you two CAN make decisions that is best for you as a couple, and while it certainly is not pleasant or easy…others will be fine when they learn of your decisions.
Its only been a few days and already your MIL is getting “better”. She stopped crying and having a normal conversation again…probably because you and your husband did not give into her initial demand, baby her, and tell her “oh never mind…we’ll stay.” MIL could cry/not be “normal” only for so long. Give it more time…day by day she will get back to normal.
While it would be nice and ideal for you two to have both his parents blessings, by now as adults, both of you need to realize that you cannot make EVERYONE happy. No matter what the situation is…someone will always be unhappy. Your SIL and FIL support this decision which should make you realize that this is not a “bad” decision. Everyone has their own way of handling upsetting news. For now if your MIL needs to talk to herself when sitting alone…let her. Give her time and space so she can come to terms with this major change however she feels is best.
Of course, in a few weeks/months whenever…once you and your husband find a place and are ready to move…if your MIL is more stable psychologically at that time…you should definitely consider asking her help you in decorating the new place. 