Re: The career woman bride
So yeah it ultimately boils down to choice for each gender.
Does a man have a choice, independently, to decide after marriage to NOT work? Or may be work part time because he wants to pursue his other non-paying interests in life?
Re: The career woman bride
I like to pick things up and put them down.
Re: The career woman bride
I don't believe in making generalizations It would be like my saying: "Men are neanderthals." And I've found the odd exception to that statement
:D
BUT, they want to choose the change in their lifestyle from career woman to homemaker, and do not want to be told what to do.
on a serious note........what would it take a woman to switch??
And if she doesn't switch at the right time ( believed to be right time by her husband with all his sincerety)....... then would she say no just because she was being told to do it??
Well if that is most women's psyche, then I'm a happy chappy .
dude...its 'some women's psyche'.....:D
Gather round boys, here's a free lesson into** some women's psyche**:
Re: The career woman bride
As a guy, agree with Jaanwar and Rizla :k:
Re: The career woman bride
**
will you carry them a few feet if asked?
**
Re: The career woman bride
So yeah it ultimately boils down to choice for each gender.
Does a man have a choice, independently, to decide after marriage to NOT work? Or may be work part time because he wants to pursue his other non-paying interests in life?
I think thats something he should say before he gets married, I know people cant predict how they will feel in future but you should always give yourself some 'wiggle room'.
My husband told me that he wanted to stop working for his family and set up his own business so he would be saving every penny he gets from work to invest in his own business, so if I married him I would have to accept that he would not be contributing financially to the house for a few years. I accepted this on the condition that after 3 years if the business was not paying for itself he would have to abandon it and get a job to contribute. Fair enough, whether he set the business up or not I knew that I may at some point have to support both of us for 3 years. I said that that I may want to go back to uni and study some more, even though I have not enrolled on anything yet, he knows that I loved my studies and may go back at some point.
Re: The career woman bride
I like to pick things up and put them down. (waiting for someone, anyone.. to get the reference)
Yes, for you , ofcourse. 
Just don’t ask me to put it in front of a mall entrance. 
Re: The career woman bride
yeh beauty and the Beast .. 
Re: The career woman bride
I think thats something he should say before he gets married, I know people cant predict how they will feel in future but you should always give yourself some 'wiggle room'.
Fair enough but the way women here are setting it up for themselves is to be able to make the choice whenever they want, of their own free will, without any conditions, and not being told what to do.
Men should also have the same option, and the responsibility to be bread earners shouldn't fall on their shoulders by default.
Re: The career woman bride
I don't see what is so wrong with your aunt's consideration. It is a matter of personal preference. To be honest I wouldn't want an overly ambitious career woman who doesn't have enough time and energy to take care of the house and the family to be my wife. Perhaps it has to do with the environment I was raised in. My father was the bread earner and my mother has always been a housewife, and the way I have seen her always being available and taking care of us, I want my wife to be the same way. However I really don't mind her having a career that keeps her occupied in her spare time and doesn't interfere with the family life.
I reckon since your cousin is quite successful in his career, he doesn't foresee much financial difficulties and so his preference is a lady who can take care of the house and the children instead of being occupied with her career constantly.
Jaanwar sums it up perfectly.
Re: The career woman bride
You dont call a guy ‘beauty’ .. 
Oh wait, you were referring to yourself .. 
sorry 
Re: The career woman bride
Gather round boys, here's a free lesson into some women's psyche:
MOST women do want to stay home and raise their children and take that sabbatical from their career (for how long depends on the woman). As enjoyable and fulfilling and financially rewarding as that career is or has been, nothing compares to motherhood. BUT, they want to choose the change in their lifestyle from career woman to homemaker, and do not want to be told what to do.
Added to that, they also need positive reinforcement to validate both their prior contribution to the household (and dare I say society) as first a career woman and then later as a homemaker. If they feel unappreciated in either of their roles there is resentment. It's the idea of: Were they less of a wife or mother when they had a career? Or are they less of an independent woman now that they are at home with the kids? They need to feel important despite the changes they've made or that have happened in their identity and lifestyle.
What the wise one said. I agree
Re: The career woman bride
Re: The career woman bride
Gather round boys, here's a free lesson into some women's psyche:
MOST women do want to stay home and raise their children and take that sabbatical from their career (for how long depends on the woman). As enjoyable and fulfilling and financially rewarding as that career is or has been, nothing compares to motherhood. BUT, they want to choose the change in their lifestyle from career woman to homemaker, and do not want to be told what to do.
Added to that, they also need positive reinforcement to validate both their prior contribution to the household (and dare I say society) as first a career woman and then later as a homemaker. If they feel unappreciated in either of their roles there is resentment. It's the idea of: Were they less of a wife or mother when they had a career? Or are they less of an independent woman now that they are at home with the kids? They need to feel important despite the changes they've made or that have happened in their identity and lifestyle.
Thank you for free lesson ... its as the ismart lady said
Re: The career woman bride
probably thinks the woman got her job via 2 ways;
1- slept with the boss...so in this case, not a good bride to be for her bichara innocent munchkin...
2- slaughtered her way to the top, by being a b*. and this is another reason why she wouldnt be a suitable candiddate. we all think that a highly powered career woman must also be a very determined, ambitious and a b* so wouldnt let anything come in the way of it, as well as having a similar personality, and using this attitude at home with her inlaws- wouldnt work.
That has to be the most sane thing you've ever said to date.
Not saying that's what career women are like, but that can be the perception by some ignorant people.
And also, any woman who is hard working and skilled enough to be getting ahead in career is not likely to be ANYONE"s ghulam so that can turn off some folks. I say, all the better for them, you're weeding out kachra.
Not htat I'm saying SAHM/SAHW/less advanced career women are anyone's ghulam.
Re: The career woman bride
on a serious note........what would it take a woman to switch??
And if she doesn't switch at the right time ( believed to be right time by her husband with all his sincerety)....... then would she say no just because she was being told to do it??
Here's another freebie: A lot of women have been raised to be obedient and defer to their parents and families in their life choices, including the choice of who to marry. These same women were told by their parents, once you are married, you will be in control of your own future. The conflict arises when they feel that that long yearned for control over their life choices has been taken from them even before they've enjoyed it. Their career ambitions and the desire to hold onto their career becomes contentious because for many it is the only element of their life that they had any control over without parental interference in their unmarried lives. So they want to make any choices connected their career.
Now guys, put yourself in her shoes for just a minute. Think about a specific example when you were TOLD to do something, including by a loved one who you trust. Not to say that you didn't do what you were told, but were you happy or was there an element of resentment that made you drag your feet and delay something you would have done anyway?
Fair enough but the way women here are setting it up for themselves is to be able to make the choice whenever they want, of their own free will, without any conditions, and not being told what to do.
Men should also have the same option, and the responsibility to be bread earners shouldn't fall on their shoulders by default.
^ Funny enough, I once took a gender studies class that had me ponder that very question. Yes, if women demand equity and equality, then why are they unwilling to extend the same right/privilege/expectation to men? Why is a man expected to be the sole breadearner for the family, isn't he entitled to rest or not work if that is his choice? I don't have an answer other than, if he wants to deviate from societal norms (as he is entitled to do), then he too should discuss it within the family unit so that the decision is mutual.
Moral of the story, a couple between them need to discuss these sorts of decisions and arrive at a mutual decision. No one party should dictate or command the other and the objective should not be to "win" an argument or debate or choice. Rather, the objective should be that there are no "losers" in the outcome.
Re: The career woman bride
hmm....ok..
so if women are told 'nicely' then they will agree to switch..
but whats the reason behind women 'not switching'??
Re: The career woman bride
I can't speak for all woman, but why would a woman choose not to give up her career - there could be any number of reasons and it depends on the specific woman and her husband.
Here are some different reasons
It could be any of these reasons, a combination of these, or none at all. Every woman is different and she will arrive at her life choices for her own personal reasons.
And some women if discussed with them, will agree to give up their career, and some will not.
Re: The career woman bride
What reference?
None of the women here have stated they would like to be exempt from the responsibility of raising their children though. All they’re merely saying is instead of an order, it needs to be a joint decision both come to. And why not? Its a partnership right? So consulting your partner should not make anyone feel like less of a person…that would make for a really small person to begin with.
Can you find a post where a woman has said she does not want to switch at all? When you find the problem, we shall give you an answer.
Re: The career woman bride
Can you find a post where a woman has said she does not want to switch at all? When you find the problem, we shall give you an answer.
its not about the 'posting' women all the time..... and don't tell me that there are no women who refuse to switch due to 'whatever' reasons.....and end up with neglected children, bad marriages or divorces..
so it was a general question ...