Re: tell husband how much savings you have? what your salary is?
What was this guy doing in Pakistan? Daydreaming there too?
Re: tell husband how much savings you have? what your salary is?
As for people saying hey just tell him what u make, he can't take it from you. Again, when you hear girls or guys, and they get taken for everything they have. IT ALL starts slowly. The less someone knows the better. If he was just asking out of curiosity, he wouldnt continue hounding me about it. Obviously he has someother intentions.
So what's the point of this thread? Why are you asking us if the decision to hide your income from him is right? Going by what you wrote above......looks like you already knew the answer to your question AND already had your mind made up that you were not going to share you income.
No matter what anyone says about your marriage, husband, income sharing etc......you have a come back & a reason behind why you're already doing the right thing. So what is your purpose for creating this thread? I just want this clarified so people aren't wasting their time giving you advice/opinions on topics that you have already made a decision on.
BTW, isn't his green card the conditional 2 year card?
Re: tell husband how much savings you have? what your salary is?
Did you read Iconoclast’s comment? Her wife said something once… and he stills remember.
As TS jani asked you question what does he do all day?
What is his qualification?
Generally, Mards do not look good while staying at home?
He has GC and spent 6 months. Why is he waiting?
Can not he apply at any job?
Khali zehan shaitan ka kar kahana hota hia.. din bhar fazol sochta hoga. uski activity bhi nahi nahi… OTT… you are making biryanies on deman… itni khidmat to maan bhi nahi karti hia bety ki…
you relations is seriously needed a counseling session…
BTW.. you are the man of house… 
Re: tell husband how much savings you have? what your salary is?
So really what you're doing is hedging your bets on the off chance that he may be sincere and that maybe the marriage will work. You're hoping that he may prove to be a good husband and father.
Yes, your posts suggest you're trying harder than he is (though we only get one side in any thread) - but even then, you're living this marriage with one foot out the door which will affect a marriage. Good luck with the marriage given that neither one of you are "all in" this marriage.
Re: tell husband how much savings you have? what your salary is?
So what's the point of this thread? Why are you asking us if the decision to hide your income from him is right? Going by what you wrote above......looks like you already knew the answer to your question AND already had your mind made up that you were not going to share you income.
No matter what anyone says about your marriage, husband, income sharing etc......you have a come back & a reason behind why you're already doing the right thing. So what is your purpose for creating this thread? I just want this clarified so people aren't wasting their time giving you advice/opinions on topics that you have already made a decision on.
BTW, isn't his green card the conditional 2 year card?
That's alright. Sometimes we need a sounding board and sometimes there are no right answers.
Life is complicated.
It's like cricket, you play the shot as the ball gets pitched to you.
Re: tell husband how much savings you have? what your salary is?
Oh and I don't know why you think you have to support him for 7 yes. You don't. He has a green card, he can get a job and support himself. You are not going to jail for not supporting him.
I few months back it was really getting out of control. Like I would spend my time on the train back from work praying. I did go to a immigration lawyer he said the following. If im wrong let me know.
You have a year to file for an annalment. This is the only way to get him deported, as the marriage was based on fraud. He wasn't even trying to have kids at the time.
In NY it takes a few months just to get into court. For those months i have to suport him. And in that time he has alot of time to like humiliate me and bother me.
He has a 10 year green card. So its really up to immigration. When I get the annallment, it goes to immigration, its upto who ever is sitting in immigration. So in the end I can go through all this, and end up with him still in the US and having to support him for a few years.
Again I do want to make it work, but I keep in my mind that divorce is a possiblity, it can happen, expecially when someone mentiones it a couple times a month. I keep my self protected in the case that it does happen. I have seen women give up everything to save a marriage, and the guy leaves anyway. I dont want to be in that situation.
Also he has exams he needs to pass inorder to qualify for his line of work. So he uses that as an excuse to not work. Im fine with that, but what angers me is when I see him looking at stock market stuff when it has absolutely nothing to do with his field of work. I rather not share what exam or what his field is. it because honestly I dont know who reads these boards and dont want someone to guess who i am.
Re: tell husband how much savings you have? what your salary is?
The purchase is being done as a tenancy in common my parents will own the home 99% and I have 1%. THe mortgage will be 100% in my name. SO incase of divorce he at most will be intitled to half of 1% which im ok with losing.
As for love, no i dont love him. but if someone is saying hey im going to leave you over and over, well what do I say to that? I dont want to extend the arguement, but at the sametime i want him to know ok if you want to leave im not going to go cry in a corner. Fine leave, but I want you to stay. If anyone has a better idea as to what to say in this situation please let me know. When dont say anything fine that works, but when i do get angry, instead of argueing back, i say ok, noone is forcing you to stay, you can leave if you want, but I would like you to stay.
You can convey what you just said above in a more rational manner. In fact, you did so already in your post above. The reason I suggested you refrain from dramatic statements and empty threats is that they can easily be interpreted as emotional blackmail by your husband and that will result in two things: (1) resentment on his part (see Iconoclast's comments regarding a comment his wife made years ago, which he still remembers today) and further arguments, further exacerbating the situation, and (2) cause him to follow your lead and respond with the drama and threats of his own, which will derail any efforts to discuss matters rationally and maturely and make things work.
Re: tell husband how much savings you have? what your salary is?
So what's the point of this thread? Why are you asking us if the decision to hide your income from him is right? Going by what you wrote above......looks like you already knew the answer to your question AND already had your mind made up that you were not going to share you income.
No matter what anyone says about your marriage, husband, income sharing etc......you have a come back & a reason behind why you're already doing the right thing. So what is your purpose for creating this thread? I just want this clarified so people aren't wasting their time giving you advice/opinions on topics that you have already made a decision on.
BTW, isn't his green card the conditional 2 year card?
My purpose was to see if I was right, and alot of people agreed with me. secondly, alot of people recommended other things as well. I like to see what options and results I can have by making a decision. When I read other stories, and see what happens, it gives me more knoweldge to make a proper decision.
Re: tell husband how much savings you have? what your salary is?
What was this guy doing in Pakistan? Daydreaming there too?
He has 10K savings as she mentioned. I don't think you can have that kind of savings just by daydreaming & she isn't giving him pocket money either.
Re: tell husband how much savings you have? what your salary is?
I few months back it was really getting out of control. Like I would spend my time on the train back from work praying. I did go to a immigration lawyer he said the following. If im wrong let me know.
You have a year to file for an annalment. This is the only way to get him deported, as the marriage was based on fraud. He wasn't even trying to have kids at the time.
In NY it takes a few months just to get into court. For those months i have to suport him. And in that time he has alot of time to like humiliate me and bother me.
He has a 10 year green card. So its really up to immigration. When I get the annallment, it goes to immigration, its upto who ever is sitting in immigration. So in the end I can go through all this, and end up with him still in the US and having to support him for a few years.
Again I do want to make it work, but I keep in my mind that divorce is a possiblity, it can happen, expecially when someone mentiones it a couple times a month. I keep my self protected in the case that it does happen. I have seen women give up everything to save a marriage, and the guy leaves anyway. I dont want to be in that situation.
Also he has exams he needs to pass inorder to qualify for his line of work. So he uses that as an excuse to not work. Im fine with that, but what angers me is when I see him looking at stock market stuff when it has absolutely nothing to do with his field of work. I rather not share what exam or what his field is. it because honestly I dont know who reads these boards and dont want someone to guess who i am.
Its strange how can you survive in such a toxic relationship.
Better save the emotional energy and get out, money is not worth continuous stress.
Re: tell husband how much savings you have? what your salary is?
@ OP
That thread you started sometime back about your friend whose husband failed a professional exam...... was that really your friends husband or you were talking about yourself? ...... because that dude had 10k savings too .... so just curious .....
Re: tell husband how much savings you have? what your salary is?
I few months back it was really getting out of control. Like I would spend my time on the train back from work praying. I did go to a immigration lawyer he said the following. If im wrong let me know.
You have a year to file for an annalment. This is the only way to get him deported, as the marriage was based on fraud. He wasn't even trying to have kids at the time.
In NY it takes a few months just to get into court. For those months i have to suport him. And in that time he has alot of time to like humiliate me and bother me.
He has a 10 year green card. So its really up to immigration. When I get the annallment, it goes to immigration, its upto who ever is sitting in immigration. So in the end I can go through all this, and end up with him still in the US and having to support him for a few years.
Again I do want to make it work, but I keep in my mind that divorce is a possiblity, it can happen, expecially when someone mentiones it a couple times a month. I keep my self protected in the case that it does happen. I have seen women give up everything to save a marriage, and the guy leaves anyway. I dont want to be in that situation.
Also he has exams he needs to pass inorder to qualify for his line of work. So he uses that as an excuse to not work. Im fine with that, but what angers me is when I see him looking at stock market stuff when it has absolutely nothing to do with his field of work. I rather not share what exam or what his field is. it because honestly I dont know who reads these boards and dont want someone to guess who i am.
Is he making any progress with his exam preparation ?
Is there a schedule he is working to ?
What if he is goofing off all day and fails the exams ?
Stock market stuff is nonsense in his situation.
I think he is just being too lazy or just not confident enough to go out there and work a job until he takes the exams he needs.
I think if you decide to divorce, he needs to move out and support himself anyway.
Re: tell husband how much savings you have? what your salary is?
@ OP
That thread you started sometime back about your friend whose husband failed a professional exam...... was that really your friends husband or you were talking about yourself? ...... because that dude had 10k savings too .... so just curious .....
I salute your commitment to the forum sir.
Re: tell husband how much savings you have? what your salary is?
lol no, that guy was in a different field. To be honest, my friend is expecting a kid, and like once he found out, the guy like immediately started to get better. If anything that makes me like think my husband might change too.
Re: tell husband how much savings you have? what your salary is?
You constantly talk of divorce. You hide stuff from him, you have gone to see an immigration lawyer. You feel threatened and humiliated by him.
Why are you still married to him?
Re: tell husband how much savings you have? what your salary is?
That might be a hypothetical situation… 
mission accomplished…
Re: tell husband how much savings you have? what your salary is?
I salute your commitment to the forum sir.
Thanks a lot sir ..... I really appreciate that ....
Re: tell husband how much savings you have? what your salary is?
lol no, that guy was in a different field. To be honest, my friend is expecting a kid, and like once he found out, the guy like immediately started to get better. If anything that makes me like think my husband might change too.
^That's quite a serious gamble though, isn't it? It's good that your friend's husband became more responsible once he found out she was expecting. What if the opposite happened though, and he had remained the same and did not improve? I don't think taking such a serious risk is the best idea.
Re: tell husband how much savings you have? what your salary is?
Or rhetorical, ek soota edhar vi suttoo
Re: tell husband how much savings you have? what your salary is?
achaawwwwww … hmmm 