Also, either side who looks down upon the other is just INSECURE.
The working women who look down upon stay at home moms are insecure coz they don't have the luxury of staying home and enjoying life at a leisurely pace. The stay at home moms criticizing working women are insecure coz they are envy women who get to go out and work in a field they enjoy.
By the way I came across a survey of women on WSJ and they were all very well known and were CEOs, directors and managers of really famous companies. They all said motherhood is the toughest job they've ever had.
u dont need to be a CEO or director to say that motherhood is hard.
It IS hard.. because u r soley responsible for how that child is raised. Regardless of whether the child goes to daycare or not, a mother is responsible for her child's uprbrining. Anyone can tell u it's a hard job. Imagine that... being responsible for someone else's life and future?
What im trying to say is... dont equate staying at home to someone who works and looks after children. And pls dont say that us working mothers are envious of ur role either. We arent. Most of us dont work because we have to, because we want to... so there is nothing to be envious of. We only get catty, when u start comparing the two lives...
by all means go ahead and compare a life of a housewife to someone who works minus the kids.
You're absolutely right, sadzz. Working and making sure you're there for your family is very tough! I have seen my mother do it and it has definitely been really hard. She made sure she excelled in her profession and was always there for us and I think it really took a toll on her. I think she has aged earlier than her time. Honestly it's after seeing her that I made a mental note to myself that I am not going to be working full time till my kids start going to elementary school. I honestly can't do what my mom did and my mom has never looked down upon stay at home women. Do whatever makes you happy!!
Stating that just coz a women has a professional degree she needs to be a productive member of society? Well she is...she is raising her kids and that's productive for her! I got a law degree but I am not going to work when I have kids and if anybody dare tell me that I am not being productive, I could care less.
Why can't we all just RESPECT women and stop judging each other? A stay at home mother is not better than a working mother and vice versa. But yes working mothers have it a lot tougher! And I think single working women have it the easiest because it's kids that make your life take a drastic turn.
u dont need to be a CEO or director to say that motherhood is hard.
It IS hard.. because u r soley responsible for how that child is raised. Regardless of whether the child goes to daycare or not, a mother is responsible for her child's uprbrining. Anyone can tell u it's a hard job. Imagine that... being responsible for someone else's life and future?
What im trying to say is... dont equate staying at home to someone who works and looks after children. And pls dont say that us working mothers are envious of ur role either. We arent. Most of us dont work because we have to, because we want to... so there is nothing to be envious of. We only get catty, when u start comparing the two lives...
by all means go ahead and compare a life of a housewife to someone who works minus the kids.
I was responding to PCG's rather arrogant post where she claims that what she does is way stressful than motherhood ever would be. Being a director or CEO and managing an entire company are also very stressful jobs but even then these women stated that motherhood is what was most challenging to them.
Nobody is equating these two sides. I am just saying that nobody needs to look down on anyone. Just because a woman is a stay at home mom does not mean she has it really easy or she is wasting her life not being a productive member.
And working women who constantly put stay at home mothers down ARE insecure. It's insecurity that forces a person to look down upon another for pathetic reasons.
^ cherry, just wanted to say, i dont look down upon housewives. I have a very good friend who quit her job and is at home and i know how busy her schedule is.
My mum worked for most of my growing up years... and i know she worked hard to give us the best and give us a good head start at life, but unliek you, I actually do want to work... i dont work as hard enough as my mum did... i know exactly what she went through, but i do work :) And she is still working hard. Looking after her two granddaughters whilst her DIL gets a degree. I respect both these women.
Ive never said that women who take a break from career to raise kids are not productive. They are... its just i HATE it when they say their life is just as hard... it's not. And thank u for acknowledging that. Everytime i open my mouth abuot how tired i am, i hear from a housewife how she is more tired than me.
I dont need to hear that. But i do, so i dont bother mentioning it anymore.
noone needs to be compared, its not nice... we should just acknowledge each others lives.. and be content
^Right. At the end of the day we're all the same, we're doing the best we can, whether its working outside of the house, or staying at home, or doing both. We're surviving, excelling everywhere. So stop singling out people and creating these stupid rifts
I was responding to PCG's rather arrogant post where she claims that what she does is way stressful than motherhood ever would be. Being a director or CEO and managing an entire company are also very stressful jobs but even then these women stated that motherhood is what was most challenging to them.
Nobody is equating these two sides. I am just saying that nobody needs to look down on anyone. Just because a woman is a stay at home mom does not mean she has it really easy or she is wasting her life not being a productive member.
And working women who constantly put stay at home mothers down ARE insecure. It's insecurity that forces a person to look down upon another for pathetic reasons.
maybe working mothers who feel guilty about leaving their child are insecure. I dunno.
My mom is the only one among her 9 sisters who worked post-marriage and post-kids because she is a doctor and did not want to give up her medical career. The rest of them, highly educated/intelligent, gave priority to their home and kids, and let the husbands take care of the finances. My mom is the most successful of them all, has earned alot of name and respect, and done extremely well for herself and the family. Her sisters look upto her and everyone in her family gives her example. Even I am really proud of my mother for going against all odds at so many times to keep that perfect balance between her home and career. When she had me, she didn't give up her work because she needed to support my dad financially, and then because she was so successful, it became a part of her life. She has always been a wonderful wife and mother.
After I got married, I saw the same with my mother in law. She is considered to be one of the most successful desi women in Miami, she has an amazing career and everything but her home and family always take priority.
But what I respect most about my mom and my mil is they do not carry around any superiority complex. Despite of all the praises they get for being established career women and awesome mothers, I have never seen them look down upon anyone else. Not everyone is capable of running a home and working at the same time. That doesn't make them bad, unintelligent or waste of space. It's their choice and their priority in life. My mother is the most humble and down to earth person you will ever meet, and that's what earns her respect here.
I have pity for those who are so stuck in their superiority complex that instead of being happy and satisfied with their lives, they find satisfaction in judging and insulting others. They don't work so they can achieve something out of passion, they do it so they can show off to others what a great life they have. Whether it's about going to a better/bigger school, having a better career, having a better home life, comparing their kids, they can't help but look at others and point fingers. Why do people do that? Can't they mind their own life? It's especially alarming when I see young girls in their late teens or early twenties doing that. Oh, I am going to a better school than you, oh I have a better degree than you... where do you think this sort of pride and insecurity will take you in life? You may become very successful but at the end of the day, you're pretty low of a judgemental human being.
^ seriously pareezay, i dont know many working mothers who are showing off. Some may.. yes, but i dont know enough of them or any of them.
I have sadly met a lot of housewives who compete with each other and if ive mentioned that ive had a tough week or day, they are quick to point out how hard their day was. Look, noone is saying ur day hasnt been hard, just dont compare it unless you've been able to see the other side.
Mashallah, it's great to see both ur mother and MIL doing so well and be successful.
Just to point out, not all hardworking mothers becoem successful, but we should still praise them nonetheless. Not all of our mothers are educated... but they have worked strenuous hours outside of home just to help their partner financially and get their children to the point they are today.... these women dont get acknowledged enough. And sadly, thats one reason why these women dont even talk about how hard their life had been or was... they are embarrassed of the jobs they have done, because they did not have the education to get them into office roles... but u know what, at least they helped. They worked hard.... good on those women too
^ seriously pareezay, i dont know many working mothers who are showing off. Some may.. yes, but i dont know enough of them or any of them.
Sadz, I know, I am not talking about any of the mothers on gs (working or not working). I find this to be in girls I have seen here, thankfully not so many in real life, who have this oh im sooo better than you attitude. It's sad.
Just to point out, not all hardworking mothers becoem successful, but we should still praise them nonetheless. Not all of our mothers are educated... but they have worked strenuous hours outside of home just to help their partner financially and get their children to the point they are today.... these women dont get acknowledged enough. And sadly, thats one reason why these women dont even talk about how hard their life had been or was... they are embarrassed of the jobs they have done, because they did not have the education to get them into office roles... but u know what, at least they helped. They worked hard.... good on those women too
Exactly, thank you for saying this!
Why is there a need to praise only those who have a career and manage their homes? Why do people look down upon stay home mothers? It's ridiculous.
^ it's not even that Pareezay. There are many mothers who have worked in factories, who have worked really difficult jobs. And whoever has the nerve to say that factory work is not hard, has another thing coming. It is damn hard work..
but these women get looked down upon by female doctors or people who are in office roles... seirously. I have seen it happen, but i have also see how there children turn out....
^ So true; people look down upon these women who work in stores and factories but they are out there leading the toughest life because they need to work to make sure their family has a good life and be there for their own family.
It's not about being 'successful' in your career. Women should respect each other no matter what role they have chosen to take on in this life.
^ it's not even that Pareezay. There are many mothers who have worked in factories, who have worked really difficult jobs. And whoever has the nerve to say that factory work is not hard, has another thing coming. It is damn hard work..
but these women get looked down upon by female doctors or people who are in office roles... seirously. I have seen it happen, but i have also see how there children turn out....
we should just applaud all mothers for trying
Absolutely.
Alot of them, if not all, do it to support their kids and families. Some do it for sake of their careers. Whatever their reasons are, they deserve to be respected instead of being judged. At the end of the day, they are all mothers and they love their kids unconditionally.
but these women get looked down upon by female doctors or people who are in office roles... seirously. I have seen it happen, but i have also see how there children turn out....
we should just applaud all mothers for trying
Yes, and that's what I meant when I said superiority complex. It's especially dangerous when you see young girls having this sort of attitude because later on when they become wives and mothers, they don't change, and do what you wrote above.
^ the saddest thing is when ur own children look down upon u or are embarrassed of what u did to give them the best.
These kids grow up and want only the best, not that that's a bad thing, but they really should be appreciative of their parents.. really they need to just say 'thank u' and not be embarrassed. Not demand the branded stuff.. not live life like they are the richest kids on the blcok. Just be thankful to ur parents and God
Sadz, yeah :( You only realize it when you become a parent yourself, everything that your parents did for you.
Gosh, I feel like giving my parents a big hug, for everything they have done and continue to do, for all their hard work so they can give us a better life :(
