Re: so you dont love your wife anymore
Its not easy for men to just walk away 4rm his life (wife n kidz). as i said earlier if some1 do like this he's mentally disable or he's sex-addicted. Tell me do u leave ever ur flush n blood? i don't think so.
^ Honestly how many women have u seen (or heard) in your life who left their hubbies (and kids) after being married for that long simply because they felt no attraction/love towards their hubbies??? but we do see (or hear) about lots of men doing that... y it is so easy for men? seriously WHY?
the example that clothesmad gave did not mention love or attraction did it? it noted changes that the husband wanted to see that the wife was not making.
and regardless of what is the stated reason, there are many commonalities in why people split, and its about differences, whether its expectations about treatment, about fidelity, about how one raises kids, its differences, now whether someone says that due to these differences and misgivings they did not feel attracted to the person anymore, or they felt they were trapped/oppressed its the same thing.
Its not easy for men to just walk away 4rm his life (wife n kidz). as i said earlier if some1 do like this he's mentally disable or he's sex-addicted. Tell me do u live ever ur flush n blood? i don't think so.
so anyone who divorces his wife is sex starved and/or mentally disabled?
Re: so you dont love your wife anymore
probably...
Re: so you dont love your wife anymore
what if he does not divorce one but gets a new one, is he sex starved or mentally disabled.
hint: be very careful as you answer this question, you may not like where it leads to.
Re: so you dont love your wife anymore
Depends on reality but mostly credit go to SS.
the example that clothesmad gave did not mention love or attraction did it? it noted changes that the husband wanted to see that the wife was not making.
and regardless of what is the stated reason, there are many commonalities in why people split, and its about differences, whether its expectations about treatment, about fidelity, about how one raises kids, its differences, now whether someone says that due to these differences and misgivings they did not feel attracted to the person anymore, or they felt they were trapped/oppressed its the same thing.
yes, clothesmad did metion.. u got to reread the 'justification' part
and 'husband wanted to see but wife was not making the changes'... where did u get this from?
regardless, this is just one of the example... my question remains the same, how many women have u ever come across in your life who just walked out like that? yes she would leave if there is cheating or physical abuse is involved... i m sure u must have come across few men who dumped their families after being together so many yrs... i wonder what were their justifications?and when it comes to the 'commitment' factor in marriages, men are the one who will give u most persuasive lectures....whatever...
regarding your second paragraph... well it involves Two .. its marriage, whatever u r doing its effecting ur wife and viceversa.... so if the woman chooses to bear with all these differences and misgiving craps... then why a man cannot?
Re: so you dont love your wife anymore
We so need a return policy like Walmart . At least good for 10 yeas 
Re: so you dont love your wife anymore
Women also leave men for whatever reason. In eastern culture they are not so common though. But again men also do not leave women so commonly in eastern culture based on some differences.
When children are involved, it becomes even more difficult.
*In my opinion, love is over-rated and largely not understood or even over-used term.
*
Companionship, closeness, sincerity and respect should be beyond the so called love.
When two are married, this so called love still is there but is overshadowed by above qualities. Its not like men or women no longer care for each other, its just that other priorities of life get the attention.
Mutual bonding becomes strong for most people with time and that should matter.
Reality check:
One has to ask: Can I live without this person? If the answer is no, then no worries.
But if the answer is yes, then there is a big problem. Even then thinking of leaving the person should be the last resort only if the matter cannot be solved.
One has to remember, old age will hit the person one day and long time companion is the only one who would be able to help the person in need.
Speaking of religion:
Despite divorce being considered the least desirable act in islam, there is no compulsion in marriage relation. (some hadiths can be found on this) One can leave other person if not finding the peace and harmony. Other religions on the other hand strongly admonish or more strongly oppose divorce.
Re: so you dont love your wife anymore
P.S. I am just amazed to see how many threads point to men being the bad people. Men bashing threads are flooding this section.
This question could have been asked other way too. Like ,
*so you don't love your husband anymore?
*
Does this mean women ALWAYS love their husband? lol
Is this because men are more content and do not start threads against women? or something else like following the rule:
Best defense is offense. So keep men on defensive foot. lol
^ Honestly how many women have u seen (or heard) in your life who left their hubbies (and kids) after being married for that long simply because they felt no attraction/love towards their hubbies??? but we do see (or hear) about lots of men doing that... y it is so easy for men? seriously WHY?
maybe more women should recognise themselves and acknowledge their lives and themselves a lot more if this is the case
noone should remain in an unhappy marriage
im not advocating separation.. but if someone is unhappy, even having tried to reconcile.. then really, whats the point in staying? yes u have kids but what are u teaching them?
maybe more often should recognise themselves and acknowledge their lives and themselves a lot more if this is the case
noone should remain in an unhappy marriage
im not advocating separation.. but if someone is unhappy, even having tried to reconcile.. then really, whats the point in staying? yes u have kids but what are u teaching them?
That is so true. I don't understand why one should put up with a hopeless marriage just because the couple has children. It does more bad than good for the emotional well being of the offspring if you have constant bickering, quarrels etc in your house. And, lets face it, all the frustration, remorse, anger and so on that inevitavly accompany a dysfunctional marriage are likely to take a hefty toll on the upbringing of children as well.
Question....
yes, clothesmad did metion.. u got to reread the 'justification' part and 'husband wanted to see but wife was not making the changes'... where did u get this from?
Answer...
stated that there were far too many differences within thier personality to continue, he was unhappy and has been for a long time, however continued the marraige (cause thats what your supposed to do)
His wife was like i will change to how you want me to be, but he cleary stated that he did not want to continue a marriage that was based on a threat of divorce as to the only reason to compromise her personality..
WOW, really started something here
hat is so true. I don't understand why one should put up with a hopeless marriage just because the couple has children. It does more bad than good for the emotional well being of the offspring if you have constant bickering, quarrels etc in your house. And, lets face it, all the frustration, remorse, anger and so on that inevitavly accompany a dysfunctional marriage are likely to take a hefty toll on the upbringing of children as well.
this is exactly word for word he has said. as i stated before we also belonged to the hate camp, but his reasoning was always "i am so unhappy in this marraige, i have tried different ways to resolve this in all our years together, but it just got to a stage where i cannot continue live a life of a lie, its not fair on her or me"
As far as the kids were concerned, i believe they had agreed shared custody, however it turned nasty (as most do) after the divorce.
Re: so you dont love your wife anymore
The only difference is, in the west people express themselves, and the problems of midlife crises, cheating, etc are well known. But in our desi culture, everything is hidden, if a husband cheats, he gets away with it by threatening the wife, wife subjugates. Really its a matter of culture, in desi culture every matter is swept under the carpet.
this is exactly word for word he has said. as i stated before we also belonged to the hate camp, but his reasoning was always "i am so unhappy in this marraige, i have tried different ways to resolve this in all our years together, but it just got to a stage where i cannot continue live a life of a lie, its not fair on her or me"
Wish more men were like this.