Sitting too close with cousins

[pak2015]

Re: Sitting too close with cousins

@Paheli00

So this has nothing to do with religion. They had a love marriage so I assume the way he interacts with his family and his “liberal” views on his was not a surprise to her after the wedding. She trusts him. HE is not the one initiating the physical contact.

Yet despite all this, she wants to be on guard when he is hanging around his family during events and stop acting the way he has been acting his entire life. Perhaps I am in the minority but based on this information alone, I don’t think this is worth getting upset over and causing an argument/tension in the marriage. Forcing her husband to be on guard when he’s events such a wedding will lead to nothing but resentment on his part. I could understand if this was a religious concern OR if the wife was really worried about the potential of cheating. But neither of those are an issue here. The husband had his chance to marry his cousins but HE rejected them. He CHOSE to marry his wife. Marriage already has plenty of issues that couples need to resolve. In my personal opinion, this is not something that’s worth creating a fuss over.

You and several others have mentioned how he’s being inconsiderate of her feelings. What about HIS feelings? How is he supposed to feel when he’s being told he must be on guard when at weddings/Eid gatherings around his blood family and needs to think twice before sitting somewhere, and interacting with cousins who he has interacted with his whole life? I, for one, certainly wouldn’t blame him if he feels like his wife doesn’t trust him with his own cousins…cousins who HE could have easily married but rejected already.

The issue is not about trusting her husband, I don’t think anyone is saying he’s cheating on her..it’s just inconsiderate of his wife’s feelings..the partner who has the complaints is the one who should be heard and both should come to a middle ground that satisfies both partners, the husband is not the one complaining so the focus is on the wife’s feelings because she is the one that is being hurt…he doesn’t have to be touchy feely with a female cousin who had romantic feelings for him even if he himself rejected her..his wife is not comfortable with it, not because she doesn’t trust her husband is because other people can often get involved to ruin relationships..seems like shes being wary of her more than her hsuband..it’s not all that rare to hear about relationships being sabotaged by others including relatives..better to avoid such situations..regardless of her reasons or how absurd it may sound, he should care about his wife’s feelings over a cousin..as you know marriage is a give and take, she’s not telling him to cut them out of his lives or not enjoy..she’s not being unreasonable by saying just avoid being touchy feely with another female regardless of his relationship with her, he can still enjoy his cousins company in many other appropriate ways