I really don’t like getting involved in family politics and I always try to avoid any confrontations like the plague.
The thing is, me and hubby are estranged and have been for a couple of years but we get on well for the kids sake and he sees them as regular as he can. Me and the MIL are still quite close.
Now the hubby’s niece (cousin’s daughter) got married yesterday and it’s quite far away from me. Me and my kids were NOT invited to the baraat. Now I don’t know if the bride’s family were trying to keep the numbers down or if they just assumed that me and the kids couldn’t come because of distance or school etc but don’t you think they should have at least sent me an invite out of politeness even though me and hubby are estranged? Now the MIL phoned me and has asked me to get the kids clothes ready for tomorrow because it’s the walima. I was not happy about that and told the MIL exactly what my feelings are. She said she’ll tell me and explain the whole situation when she comes round later today.
What do you think I should do? The kids are not really bothered about going or not, I am thinking that although the walima comes from the groom’s side (they are not related to the bride), maybe we should go as they may have asked me via hubby and the MIL.
What would you do? I don’t want to start an argument.
from her post, it looks like she shares a good relationship with her mil so why wud she do that? why always think negative when it comes to these relationships? :halo:
I would be offended if a relative didn't even bother posting an invite, hear your MIL out and if you think not going will cause friction in the family just be the bigger person and go.
Maybe they forgot to invite you?
Anyway, just go and have fun maybe by you going they'll realise that purposefully not inviting you was stupid and low.
**Send the kids with the MIL.......if you have not been invited there is no reason that you should go !
And if the family or relatives know that you guys are estranged they might have not invited you to avoid an awkward situation considering he will definitely be there !**
I don't think they forgot to invite me and the kids, they probably thought that if hubby brought me along, it would create an atmosphere but I'm not the type of person who would create a bad vibe amongst the guests, especially on the baraat. Me and the bride were close for quite a while when their family came from Lahore about 9 years ago and then it all went belly up when I split from hubby. I have daughters too and I would kill anyone if they came along and created a bad atmosphere on their wedding day lol!
I will hear out the MIL, I don't think she is being vindictive by plotting for me to turn up and then have people questioning why I'm there. She is not that kind of person. Maybe now the brides family have probably heard that things are OK with us and would genuinely like to see me and the kids.
The kids have basically said that if I am not invited then they will not go either. But I think an invitation is on the cards cos i spoke to MIL on the phone.
OK nor would I but what if it's a genuine word of mouth invite from the MIL or hubby himself?
I would go...I know my desi people that don't send out invites but rather its more of a word of mouth thing. If your MIL and hubby are comfortable with it go and have fun
