Should i forget and talk to him?

Lifestyle Relationships
61

Re: Should i forget and talk to him?

Them dumb the loser you call your husband! And tell him dusri larki ki zindagi barbed kerne ki zarurat nahi hau. Tum aur tumhara Amma are a match made in heaven.

62

Re: Should i forget and talk to him?

OKAY…do this.

Buy some FAKE looking gold jewelry. And give it to your MIL…tell her it’s the jewelry your parents gave you. Tell her that your parents did not feel comfortable with it but you want to “basaao your ghar…and that’s why you made this huge qurbaani” Make her feel a bit guilty when she takes it. :hehe:

And if she ever tries to sell it for money…I’d love to be there when the jeweler tells her it ain’t real. That would be AWESOME!!! :hehe:

63

Re: Should i forget and talk to him?

^ that is a superb idea! Best so far

64

Re: Should i forget and talk to him?

Well like I said, he's going to say you don't love him and you'll probably respond with, "you don't love me for making me do this." It's a vicious circle. And it's not getting you guys anywhere.

Either you can give her the jewelry and continue being sweet. When you move in with your husband, things might change. Long distance relationships are always harder, in my opinion. So just be as nice as possible when you two are talking again, and if he mentions it one more time then just do it. After you two move in together, he might not be under his mom's influence so much

My only concern is, today its jewelry. What will it be tomorrow? Asking for money, God forbid?

65

Re: Should i forget and talk to him?

[QUOTE]
1) You can try just staying quiet whenever he discusses the jewelry....and continue being respectful toward him and his mother. Ho sakta hai k ....kuch dair k baad....woh dono bhool jaaye iss baat ko.
[/QUOTE]

aik saal kafi hota hy i guess ager unho ne bhoolna hi hota tou

they have seen whatever my parents have given me bcz i used to wear it in initial days in weddings and dinners so i cant make it fake

66

Re: Should i forget and talk to him?

^Well, maybe demanding jewelry is her way of indirectly "asking for money".

67

Re: Should i forget and talk to him?

Keh do k gum ho gayi hai jewelry.....chori ho gayi.....safe phat gaya tha. Do a complete ronay dhonay ka naatak. Phir ro ro kar cheekho "Meray zevar to tumhari ammi k nazar lag gayi. Main lut gayi...barbaad hogayi." Make him feel guilty.

68

Re: Should i forget and talk to him?

i have said this to him that when ill be coming to him ill give it to my MIL so stop this issue but he never trusts me .... last time isi bat pe mujy gusa aya k he started blackmailing me k jub tak tum meri ma ko khush nai kro gi i cant make you happy.... n i am not gonna apply ur visa bla bla

[QUOTE]
My only concern in, today its jewelry. What will it be tomorrow? Asking for money, God forbid?
[/QUOTE]

thats what my family thinks

69

Re: Should i forget and talk to him?

Jewelry can be sold for money. Why can it not be seen as the same thing?

She's saying it's a trust issue, but couldn't it also be a money issue? It's a possibility. Hard to determine a person's intentions. It's weird that it's been one year and they're still hung up on the matter.

And she is your husband's mother. So, he is going to send money home to her and support her. So, it wouldn't be surprising if she asks for money in the future. That's his mom. Whether she becomes unreasonable about it is another issue and that is not always easy to determine.

70

Re: Should i forget and talk to him?

its not about money what i feel is she dsnt want me with him though it wasnt a love marriage what my instincts tell me is she wants him to leave me and us se pehly wo mujse jo kuch hasil ker skti hy ker le .... what i fear of is ager aaj wo apni ma ki itni unreasonable demand ko resist nai ker pa rha tou when she will ask him to leave me what will he do .... will he leave me saying parents are always right and me apni ma ko khush krna chahta hun or he will stay with me

thats all im only concerned of

71

Re: Should i forget and talk to him?

To bhaar main dalo aisi shadi ko!

I don't know what's wrong with these men wanting to please their mothers. It's not a son's job to please his mother, it's her husband's job. Your job is to please your husband and his is to please you. You married the wrong man! He should be locked away with his mother to forever please her. I don't get it, why can't you tell him it's not your responsibility to please his mother!

If you can't please his mother then tell him that you won't be treated like a ghulam..."ke sari zindagi ka maqsad mera tumhari amma ko khush kerna nahi hai. Main abhi bhi bohat kuch kersakti hoon. I married you not your mother!"

72

Re: Should i forget and talk to him?

Why do his parents matter more than your parents? Why does his mothers wishes have greater importance than your own parent's wishes. Why don't you have your parents discuss this matter with him and his mother? Is that possible or no? Let the adults sort it out. After all...your parents spent money on the jewelry they bought you.....they have some right to be involved in this. I've seen the way parents sometimes make sacrifices to buy wedding jewelry for their daugthers and it has sentimental value.....and that's why it angers me when in-laws cross the line in this matter.

73

Re: Should i forget and talk to him?

bcz he is the only son of that widow woman ... the only sahara
i have already shared my this concern with him but he says why would i leave you ... but its like he acts less on what he says so i dnt trust him for that

74

Re: Should i forget and talk to him?

Haaaaaw Haaai!!!! You're not suggesting that she "leave" him or dievorse him....are you? It is only a matter of time before a couple guppys come in here and shame you for suggesting this idea. She is supposed to give the jewelry and even the clothes off her back to her Sasoo Maa. She must do anything and everything to perserve.....this....ahem...."marriage" (is that what you'd call it?)

75

Re: Should i forget and talk to him?

Dumdum, I know other women who are also widows....three of my khalas are widows and two of them only have one son....they don't behave like this. Being a widow and the only son of your mother is not justification for such jaahil behavior.

76

Re: Should i forget and talk to him?

Leaving him is not in question no matter how looser he is i have to save this bcz MEIN tamasha nai bununa chahti

and the issue being discussed here is my husband not talking to me
NOT
to be him or not to be
bcz i am not a fool taking this **** since 1 whole year .... obviously i want to be with him ANYWAY

77

Re: Should i forget and talk to him?

[QUOTE]
Being a widow and the only son of your mother is not justification for such jaahil behavior.
[/QUOTE]

but she gathers the HAMDARDI like this

78

Re: Should i forget and talk to him?

Have you considered the services of kaala jaadu? :hmmm:

79

Re: Should i forget and talk to him?

^then you gotta do as he says to have some peace of mind. You can fight ithem off or you can surrender quietly and live a miserable life like the other 80% of desi married women ( yes I pulled that # out of my a$$)

80

Re: Should i forget and talk to him?

^ yes very much and recite so much for that everyday