Note: This is assuming that both husband and wife are earning and have the ideal level of ‘equality’ in this marriage as espoused by the collective mindset of this forum.
Please answer in Yes or No with your comments.
Thanks
Re: Should husbands have a choice to ?
Yes!
If he wants to, and the wife’s okay with it, why not?
Re: Should husbands have a choice to ?
Yes..
As long as everything is being taken care of properly it shouldn’t matter who goes out to work or stays at home imo
Re: Should husbands have a choice to ?
All the feminists on this forum will say yes of course.
Re: Should husbands have a choice to ?
everyone has a choice to do anything but I don’t believe in guys sitting at home while their wife works. Its a different thing if he lost job or got disabled. But I would want my roti from my mom, not my dad
Re: Should husbands have a choice to ?
Yes and YES!
Re: Should husbands have a choice to ?
What does this have to do with feminism? It is his choice, no one is forcing it on him.
OP, What you assumed in second part of your post is not possible esp if the husband has slightest of half a desi gene from 10 generations back..so there is no point in giving opinion about the first part.
Re: Should husbands have a choice to ?
Like any husband on earth would ever offer to do that? A wife will happily contribute to the finances at home, a husband would never even wash a spoon.
Re: Should husbands have a choice to ?
Yes. That was the very first discussion me and my wife had after marriage. I told her that if wants to build a career I would give mine up for the sake of the kids.
Re: Should husbands have a choice to ?
Yes, he’s desi, a doctor and he’s looking for a wife in case anyone’s interested..
Restored attachments:
Re: Should husbands have a choice to ?
From what i know of desi men, they wouldn’t agree to this situation to begin with.
But in a hypothetical universe…nah, motherhood is my job, providing for us is his job. That’s how Allah meant for it. Don’t get me wrong, I am a feminist and i do believe in equal rights..but that only goes as far as say, both want to work or both want to stay at home. It is not a woman’s job to provide for the bread and butter (unless it’s a situation where say the man is disabled, then yes..i woman should and must step up and take care, no two thoughts on that). But when everything is alright, then i don’t get why a man would want to sit at home? Heck, i’m a woman and i like being able to do both, have a job and take care of a family.
If anything, the question is, how many men and women are willing to work in conjunction, have a job and come home to take care of children equally? Both working in the kitchen to prepare a proper meal? Both cleaning up the house together? That’s where it’s at. at least for me.
Re: Should husbands have a choice to ?
So does that mean women who don’t work outside the house SIT at home? Would you say the same about SAHMs?
Re: Should husbands have a choice to ?
Umm thats not what she meant, I guess. Traditionally, men are expected to work, and handle the outside affairs. Hard to imagine a man who will just cook and clean and change diapers.
Re: Should husbands have a choice to ?
Theoretically, it is possible. In my experience, most of the women who I work with whose husbands are stay at home dads, don’t really respect them anymore. The power shifts within the relationship. Some of these women think it is their right to go off to hotel bars after work to pick up younger guys for some fun, because they are the breadwinner. Heck during my bad days, I was with a married gori, who would tell me she loved her stay at home husband, he was great, amazing. She did not respect him though, she said “bababing, you can give me what he can’t”. I was like, “don’t you feel bad”, she said nope! Just my two cents! Not all women who are the main breadwinner are like this though, and I don’t think Muslim women would behave like this, my experience is mainly from white British women who are the main breadwinner in their family.
Re: Should husbands have a choice to ?
So then do SAHMs JUST cook, clean, and change diapers? Interesting how we downplay the same duties when genders change. That’s what I am talking about. This mindset needs an upgrade. All of a sudden the work has no value because our opposite gender is doing it. This is the same reason why working women are not respected by desi inlaws unless they also do chores at home. It’s as if you cannot be respected unless you do what society expects from you. As if all of that is a prerequisite to earning someone’s respect. BULL.
Re: Should husbands have a choice to ?
So then are men perfectly right in not respecting their stay at home wives? I have a real hard time understanding double standards. This is why I say “F society!”
No difference in men or women then. With power, we all act like domineering a$$holes. Everyone should just stop complaining. LOL
Re: Should husbands have a choice to ?
I think it’s wrong to behave like that towards any spouse who deals with the house/kids etc. Just gave you my experience.
Re: Should husbands have a choice to ?
Well most SAHMs do that, unless you have a maid of course.
To hell with the desi in laws and what they think, my only point was that its hard to imagine a man who would do that. As simple as that.
If any guy here is willing to change nappies, cook, clean, and iron let me know. And oh you gotta clean the bathrooms too.
Re: Should husbands have a choice to ?
In an hypothetical, ideal world things will go like you want them to. But guess what, we are discussing the real world here.
Like I totally love how you think, but thats not how things are, sadly.
