Most westerners see accents as a fluid thing and don't view it the same way you've described..
As a child I had a Yorkshire accent but after moving south I lost it** completely**.. the same has happened with other people I know.. My brother moved back up north for uni and his accent changed again lol (for ex down here we'd say 'glarse' for 'glass' and up there it would be 'glasss'.. it sounds much more flat)..
It's usually not seen as a negative thing or even thought of as a conscious decision but even if it was I really don't see why it would be a bad thing to speak in a way in which people might understand you better.. I've said this before but it would be like me deliberately spaking Urdu or Hindi in a strong Essex accent just to sound 'authentic.' Sounds a bit ridiculous doesn't it..
Why is speaking a desi language without a western accent seen as a good thing but not the other way round?
I didn't say we should deliberately try to not be understood. Natural changes by diffusion will happen. And that is authentic. I don't know how to articulate this well. But when I hear a fake accent, it just jars me. Bollywood is the best example. When I hear of course, the course part makes me want to throw up.
I can only speak for myself. Haven't had problems making myself understood.
Also there is a marked change in the young folks (for me that is 28 to 32) from India who r in the workforce. They speak with their natural accent. Very clear. But also distinct from local accent. You r correct. The locals don't care. It is the south Asians who r so self conscious abt their accent.
Be yourself. Be natural. As u stated the accent changes gradually and automatically. No conscious effort need.
Not true. When I lived in Denmark, I met a few Germans, Belgians, and French people and they took great pains to speak Danish like the Danes, even the ones that were tourists and only in Denmark for a short period of time. In Europe accent is viewed more fluidly and quite simply, as adjusting and fitting in to your surroundings.
That said, some people have a really bad ear for languages and have a difficult time learning other languages and speaking without an accent. I do not think they should be ashamed. However, I don't believe accent or lack of it should be viewed as a matter of pride or shame in your mother tongue either.
I didn't say we should deliberately try to not be understood. Natural changes by diffusion will happen. And that is authentic. I don't know how to articulate this well. But when I hear a fake accent, it just jars me. Bollywood is the best example. When I hear of course, the course part makes me want to throw up.
I can only speak for myself. Haven't had problems making myself understood.
Also there is a marked change in the young folks (for me that is 28 to 32) from India who r in the workforce. They speak with their natural accent. Very clear. But also distinct from local accent. You r correct. The locals don't care. It is the south Asians who r so self conscious abt their accent.
Be yourself. Be natural. As u stated the accent changes gradually and automatically. No conscious effort need.
Bhoojlo aami ki bolte?
What's fake though? Of course your accent is going to sound a bit unnatural when you're not quite there, when you are still in the process of fixing it. Once you get past a certain age, you cannot rely on your accent changing naturally without some sort of conscious effort.
As far as sounding natural goes, would you be equally sympathetic to someone who sounded like they just got out of the hood? After all it is their natural accent.
What's fake though? Of course your accent is going to sound a bit unnatural when you're not quite there, when you are still in the process of fixing it. Once you get past a certain age, you cannot rely on your accent changing naturally without some sort of conscious effort.
As far as sounding natural goes, would you be equally sympathetic to someone who sounded like they just got out of the hood? After all it is their natural accent.
Let me use you as an example, Saeed. You are one of the most authentic and down to earth posters here (in addition to be one of the calmest). So I have no doubt you will be authentic when you speak.
I am all for improving oneself. If per ur preferences, accent is something that u focus on to be better, more power to you.
Fake is something that jumps out at you. Can't define it.
As for the hood statement, I love that accent. It is the content that is important to me. Not the accent. The media portrays that accent as negative. There is history behind why some choose to carry that accent proudly.
The world is changing. People who come from India these days are quite comfortable in their skin. I remember when I came here decades ago. Within the 1st week one guy became a die hard Cowboys fan. How do u do that? One can fit in. But it takes time. Kids these days get it better than my generation decades ago.
Well it's such a superficial reason though. So many good functional successful healthy happy families have a parent with an accent. Between my mom and my dad, my dad speaks great English (you'd never think he was Pakistani), but my mom has the typical Pakistani grammar from Karachi (ex. You stupid!). She has fixed some of her words because we kids would correct her like "ammi, say it like this, not like that". But overall , you can tell it's a Pakistani accent.
So I'm comfortable with those Karachi type accents.
But this guy - man, he sounds like he's from Kerala cuz he works with people from there, so he picks up their way of talking.
Happens, I worked with a Swedish group once, and I was picking up their accent. Another time, I lived with a Canadian, and people still say I pronounce some words like a Canadian.
I dunno, I'm gonna meet the guy. Give him a chance.
Well it's such a superficial reason though. So many good functional successful healthy happy families have a parent with an accent. Between my mom and my dad, my dad speaks great English (you'd never think he was Pakistani), but my mom has the typical Pakistani grammar from Karachi (ex. You stupid!). She has fixed some of her words because we kids would correct her like "ammi, say it like this, not like that". But overall , you can tell it's a Pakistani accent.
So I'm comfortable with those Karachi type accents.
But this guy - man, he sounds like he's from Kerala cuz he works with people from there, so he picks up their way of talking.
Happens, I worked with a Swedish group once, and I was picking up their accent. Another time, I lived with a Canadian, and people still say I pronounce some words like a Canadian.
I dunno, I'm gonna meet the guy. Give him a chance.
I think it's great that you're giving him a chance. Sounds like this could be something you could just get over since you seem to be fine with most of the other stuff. :)
Let me use you as an example, Saeed. You are one of the most authentic and down to earth posters here (in addition to be one of the calmest). So I have no doubt you will be authentic when you speak.
I am all for improving oneself. If per ur preferences, accent is something that u focus on to be better, more power to you.
Fake is something that jumps out at you. Can't define it.
As for the hood statement, I love that accent. It is the content that is important to me. Not the accent. The media portrays that accent as negative. There is history behind why some choose to carry that accent proudly.
Thanks for the compliment. I can't argue now. Can I?
PCG, I know a South Indian accent is extremely distracting. Its harder when you're not used to it and have trouble picking up what they're saying.
BUT...accents change. My BFF married an Indian guy who was from Bihar - his accent was strong. Extremely strong.
Over the years though, it changed. He still has an accent but the harshness is gone because he's in her company constantly and both learn from each other.
If its just the accent...nothing else...then I'd not let this dude go.
^ Some do that. But the mehndi is not permanent, nor will it be in your face all the time. So, you have a stronger case with the accent than you do with a mehndi "dot." If you think you can overlook his accent, give him a chance. If you can't, move on to the next.
It's tough because for a woman, 90% of the relationship is not about looks, sex, trophy-husband status, and such. It's about the discussions. And I'm not marrying for money or financial support, so I am marrying for company. Some marriage if you have to ask him with every other sentence "huh? what'd you say?"
It's tough because for a woman, 90% of the relationship is not about looks, sex, trophy-husband status, and such. It's about the discussions. And I'm not marrying for money or financial support, so I am marrying for company. Some marriage if you have to ask him with every other sentence "huh? what'd you say?"
If you're having such a hard time communicating with him, how do you know that he's a nice guy other than his accent?