Re: Rishta:confused about where i stand?
I think his parents have left all decisions up to him though, they have NEVER been in touch with my parents.
didnt his mom and sister come over to your house to meet you? confused
Re: Rishta:confused about where i stand?
his mum is in pakistan.
first he was going to come alone, then my dad said to him that he should bring his family so he bought his dad and sister.
He is very very close to his sister, at hour house his dad made it clear this his children are very independent and make their own decisions.
His sister travels around the world alone...
Re: Rishta:confused about where i stand?
Even the most independent children are given opinions and views by their family members which is not wrong AT ALL...
Its just that you are being very impatient... but I can understand as I have been through such a situation where after getting a green signal in the initial stages, things just stopped after we went through the waiting periods for like 6 months and in the meantime my whole family kept guessing what could be the reason for this hold... and in the end things just dissolved with a sorry and move on note from the other side (the family was involved from the initial stages and it was purely an arranged thing)... I also wanted to get is cleared in the initial stages whether things were moving ahead or not because I didn't want to hang in the middle although there was not any other proposal which we planned to take up immediately in place of that proposal... Its really really nerve wrecking...
I advise you to keep your expectations lowest from the guy... If he comes back, you will be the happiest person on the eart INSHA ALLAH... and if Allah wants to give you someone better... he will not come back and you will have to deal with it...
So just relax and have full faith on ALLAH.... and always think that there are many other girls going through the same suituation and we all need to be strong and patient... If we like someone, we may not always get him unless and until he is best for us... In order to save you from the disappointment, I advise you to keep your expectations low and think that there might be a NO from his side (I am not making you pessimistic but just want to make it easy for you to let it go if things don't move ahead according to your desire).
Re: Rishta:confused about where i stand?
once again thankyou very much for everyones advice and prayers.
A little Update :
He contacted me today. He apologised for not being in touch for 2 days but didnt really explain why. But was talking to me quite alot today.
I kept my conversation short sweet light and happy..
Lets see what happens.
I dont think hes going to call dad. Im not going to tell him to. So guess dad will be calling him.
Re: Rishta:confused about where i stand?
inspiron, the fact that he didnt involve his parents yet is a big red flag... if i like a girl, enough that i want to marry her, i'd tell my parents about her (not that im hesitant about telling my parents if im dating anyone)... but when it comes to a potential partner, I'd tell 'em for sure...
Re: Rishta:confused about where i stand?
inspiron, the fact that he didnt involve his parents yet is a big red flag... if i like a girl, enough that i want to marry her, i'd tell my parents about her (not that im hesitant about telling my parents if im dating anyone)... but when it comes to a potential partner, I'd tell 'em for sure...
Spock, thankyou for your message, when i mean his parents arent involved i mean that i think alot of the decisions are left upto him they dont give much input.
His father came to my house on saturday, and whilst they were here his mum phoned from pakistan.
However, all communication has been between himself and my dad. When his dad was here on saturday his dad said they the kids are grown up and make most decisions on their own.
Re: Rishta:confused about where i stand?
Inspiron.. what do you two talk about if he does not talk with you about the future? May be he just wants to talk with you more and wants to take more time while he is thinking about the matter?
Re: Rishta:confused about where i stand?
Inspiron.. what do you two talk about if he does not talk with you about the future? May be he just wants to talk with you more and wants to take more time while he is thinking about the matter?
Ashy, i dont mind that he doesnt talk to me about the future....i would be scared if we started planning the future. We talk about lots of other things :)
All I want him to do is get my dads permission to get to know me better.
Re: Rishta:confused about where i stand?
I have started the thread "what makes a man miss a woman" just so we can understand this better.......
Re: Rishta:confused about where i stand?
Ashy, i dont mind that he doesnt talk to me about the future....i would be scared if we started planning the future. We talk about lots of other things :)
All I want him to do is get my dads permission to get to know me better.
I guess he is trying to know you better day by day just by communicating through the calls... May be he does not want to commit for anything (not even for formal getting to know stage) at this stage with your dad... May be he wants to talk to your dad when he is dead sure about everything...
So you just need to make a good impression on him and try to be as nice as possible as this will help him decide in your favour hopefully INSHA ALLAH :D
Re: Rishta:confused about where i stand?
Spock, thankyou for your message, when i mean his parents arent involved i mean that i think alot of the decisions are left upto him they dont give much input.
His father came to my house on saturday, and whilst they were here his mum phoned from pakistan.
However, all communication has been between himself and my dad. When his dad was here on saturday his dad said they the kids are grown up and make most decisions on their own.
oh, then its all good :D
Re: Rishta:confused about where i stand?
I guess he is trying to know you better day by day just by communicating through the calls... May be he does not want to commit for anything (not even for formal getting to know stage) at this stage with your dad... May be he wants to talk to your dad when he is dead sure about everything...
So you just need to make a good impression on him and try to be as nice as possible as this will help him decide in your favour hopefully INSHA ALLAH :D
Thankyou for your advice Ashy :)
Yes we are both trying to get to know eachother better i guess (as i said before just wish it wasn't behind my dads back)
My dad will call/text him on saturday so i will keep you guys updated. Please pray for me. I love all the support and duas i get on here its AMAZING.
Im just being myself :) and i hope that also includes nice.
Re: Rishta:confused about where i stand?
Many many duas for you... I can really understand the situation which you are going through as I have been through all this... yes in the arranged thing where I had to wait for many months and it all ended nowhere after so much waiting :( I hope everthing will be just fine as per your desires INSHA ALLAH :)
Re: Rishta:confused about where i stand?
I hereby change the name of Ashy2010 to Ashy-maybe :D
j/k :@:
Re: Rishta:confused about where i stand?
^ lollzzz... MAY BE I am just trying to figure out the possible scenarios for inspiron :D
Re: Rishta:confused about where i stand?
in my opinion, that guy is not interested in inspiron.
Re: Rishta:confused about where i stand?
in my opinion, that guy is not interested in inspiron.
stayyabili, it's a little too early to say that.
Inspiron, you need to wait it out. If he's still in touch with you it means he's still thinking about it otherwise he would have told you no by now.
I know its hard but try not to let it get to you so much, engage in other activities that takes your mind off it. And don't initiate any contact, give him his space and inshallah he will come around.
I've seen a lot of friends go through this. (I know personal examples dont really prove anything and they're redundant on GS) but trust me on this.
Re: Rishta:confused about where i stand?
stayyabili, it's a little too early to say that. Inspiron, you need to wait it out. If he's still in touch with you it means he's still thinking about it otherwise he would have told you no by now. I know its hard but try not to let it get to you so much, engage in other activities that takes your mind off it. And don't initiate any contact, give him his space and inshallah he will come around. I've seen a lot of friends go through this. (I know personal examples dont really prove anything and they're redundant on GS) but trust me on this.
if inspiron is on get to know stage, then why she bring it on gs.
Re: Rishta:confused about where i stand?
^ The "relationships" to be discussed in this forum are not limited to certain stages.
Re: Rishta:confused about where i stand?
stayyabili, it's a little too early to say that. Inspiron, you need to wait it out. If he's still in touch with you it means he's still thinking about it otherwise he would have told you no by now. I know its hard but try not to let it get to you so much, engage in other activities that takes your mind off it. And don't initiate any contact, give him his space and inshallah he will come around. I've seen a lot of friends go through this. (I know personal examples dont really prove anything and they're redundant on GS) but trust me on this.
Thankyou very much bluebells and sahar for sticking up for my (all be it slightly psycho) thread :)
Yes i have decided that any interaction with him is good news as i give him the credit to be man enough to say no if he thought that it wasnt going to work.....
MEN BOOOOOOOOOOO