basically this is the condensed story…someone told my dad about this rishta my dad spoke to him 4-5 times on the phone. Me and him spoke for 3 weeks mainly through email and IM before he came to my house and got on very well really liked eachother and he seemed really keeen on me. My dad said that he would like to meet this boy ASAP, and if both parties like eachother than we can go ahead and talk on the phone and meet up and get to know eachother better.
He came to my house, whole fam seemed to love me, after he left he sent me a really nice message which was reassuring. I told him that if its ok for him to contact my dad and let him know that his fam are happy so me and him can get to know eachother with my dads blessing. He said he would.
Come today, he hasnt called. He spoke to me for like 10 mins today saying hes been busy and he would talk to me later…when he was talking to me it was really nice and positive. Im left feeling annoyed and confused.
Re: A rishta ( that i actually like) is coming to see me on saturday. SCARED!
At least he got in touch with you...he explained he was busy. And you got a good vibe from the phone call, so just try to relax. At least he didn't ignore/avoid you....cuz sometimes that can happen too if a person isn't interested.
I know that you talked to him for about a month....and you really like him....but try not to get so attached. Seek peace through prayer...and again...if it's meant to be, it'll happen. If not...then Allah will bless u with someone better. Dwelling about it and worrying over this....is not going to make anything happen any sooner is it? You know it won't. You had a life before this guy came along....that should not be put on hold...continue living your life. Maybe discuss with your parents a time-frame for waiting for a response from them. In the mean time...go about your routine....and if it exceeds the time frame....move on.
Re: A rishta ( that i actually like) is coming to see me on saturday. SCARED!
At least he got in touch with you...he explained he was busy. And you got a good vibe from the phone call, so just try to relax. At least he didn't ignore/avoid you....cuz sometimes that can happen too if a person isn't interested.
I know that you talked to him for about a month....and you really like him....but try not to get so attached. Seek peace through prayer...and again...if it's meant to be, it'll happen. If not...then Allah will bless u with someone better. Dwelling about it and worrying over this....is not going to make anything happen any sooner is it? You know it won't. You had a life before this guy came along....that should not be put on hold...continue living your life. Maybe discuss with your parents a time-frame for waiting for a response from them. In the mean time...go about your routine....and if it exceeds the time frame....move on.
thankyou RV for your advice it makes sense.
I just feel confused about where i stand with him!
Re: A rishta ( that i actually like) is coming to see me on saturday. SCARED!
take it easy... this usually happens whenever we like a rishta and this feeling is more so if the liking is mutual (especially if both the families also like the rishta)... but this can sometime happen that a very mature thing just dissolves and we do not even get a clue about the reason... sometimes its just a disagreement between the family members of the other side, sometimes its the guy's second thought etc.
Just have lots of duas and have a strong belief that if it is meant to be, it will be... Just take it easy, if this guy is meant for you, he will come back no matter what. Majority of the girls marriage age going through the same thing and we have to have a lot of patience and should not take anything seriously till the rishta is finalised (through engagement/ nikah etc) coz things can take any turn any moment.
Re: A rishta ( that i actually like) is coming to see me on saturday. SCARED!
thankyou ashy. I understand what you are saying.
Its hard for me because when he talks to me, its quite nice so i feel hes interested and i cant help but get a bit attached....but at the same time its not fully reassuring :S
Re: A rishta ( that i actually like) is coming to see me on saturday. SCARED!
thankyou ashy. I understand what you are saying.
Its hard for me because when he talks to me, its quite nice so i feel hes interested and i cant help but get a bit attached....but at the same time its not fully reassuring :S
iA may the out come of this be in your best interests. Hang in there, keep your self busy and wait. The whole situ sounds positive so far :)
Wish you the best!
Re: A rishta ( that i actually like) is coming to see me on saturday. SCARED!
i had a potential rishta visit last week and i was sooo nervous that i barely slept the night before. the parents came and made me feel so relaxed, especially the boys dad, he was chatty and made me feel so comfortable. be yourself and and it always helps if your sister or your mum can help you to feel calm and chilled. it worked for me.
Re: A rishta ( that i actually like) is coming to see me on saturday. SCARED!
iA may the out come of this be in your best interests. Hang in there, keep your self busy and wait. The whole situ sounds positive so far :)
Wish you the best!
thankyou for your dua escapist i pray for that too :)
Im going to try and relax and go with the flow and try not to stress too much! hopefully there will be a positive result.
Re: A rishta ( that i actually like) is coming to see me on saturday. SCARED!
Just from the perspective of a guy, the fact that you still haven't heard yet from the family is a sign of good news. Hang in there. Usually, what the family of the guy is doing is talking amongst themselves and their families members on how best to approach the details of the rishta, what the next step would be, checking their schedules etc. Nothing to worry about. I wish you the best of luck.
Re: A rishta ( that i actually like) is coming to see me on saturday. SCARED!
Just from the perspective of a guy, the fact that you still haven't heard yet from the family is a sign of good news. Hang in there. Usually, what the family of the guy is doing is talking amongst themselves and their families members on how best to approach the details of the rishta, what the next step would be, checking their schedules etc. Nothing to worry about. I wish you the best of luck.
Thankyou very much omer for a guys perspective very much appreciated! and thankyou for the wishes.
this whole rishta thing being followed up is a little new to me.
I am giving this guy the credit that if he is not interested he will clearly say so an i am taking the fact that he positively talking to me as a good sign.
As mentioned before in this post i have barriers and fears about men treating me badly for 2 past bad experiences so i am finding it hard to relax.
The constant question comes up in my head....is he just leading me on? However this may just be an irrational thought?
Re: A rishta ( that i actually like) is coming to see me on saturday. SCARED!
Inspiron, im very happy for you, hope you have a happy life iA
Also i think your story is an inspiration for all. When at times when you feel down and think life is going nowhere, you never know what will be waiting around the corner for you
Maybe they are weighing their options? Most people do that hence take up time before going ahead with a particular rishta. However if you guys have talked before, got along and now the families liked each other too it would bother me too if there is a delay in this. I am not saying they call you up and ask for the wedding date but atleast the process towards it should have started.
Just stay positive but don't pin all your hopes on one particular rishta. Wish you the best.
As a guy, if he wanted to reject the rishta, I think he would have already. He might really be busy or, as people have mentioned, he might be talking to his parents etc. I don't think a delay is a cause for concern although I imagine it feels really nerve wracking for you.
You women and your emotions :p. Best of luck and hang in there. Call CM if you need a distraction, his self righteousness is very amusing lol
How long has it now been that you haven't heard from him? And how much time is that without any contact compared to the last couple of weeks when you guys were talking regularly. What I mean is , is the time that's elapsed now, longer or shorter than the time between conversations you've been having on a regular basis?
