Re: quesion for ladies
Is she hot? Can she cook? Can I send her out to work?
I kid. I’d be a little worried at the limited extent of the husband’s thought process. It would seem to me the most important issue in this scenario is providing help to a person in need.
How you help someone is very important, and I’d like to think that there are enough options available today so as to ensure that women don’t need to marry out of majboori.
Think of it from the widowed/divorced woman’s perspective. Most people are khudar to some extent, and given a choice over being married to someone as a ‘charity’ case; playing second fiddle to his first wife, having your child live and grow up in an awkward situation OR be given the support to help you stand on your own two feet and take responsibility for your decisions, I know which I’d pick.
Also, the whole Sawab thing confuses me somewhat. If you believe strongly that something is the right thing to do, then it should be done without thought to reward.
If he came to me with the marriage for Sawab option, I’d probably roll my eyes and try to hear him out without collapsing into laughter.
If he came to me and said ‘Begum, there is a woman in need. We are going to help her get organized, and provide financial and moral support so that she can build for herself the kind of life she wants for her and her child. In return we want nothing.’ Then, well, heck,* I’d* reward him.