oh you mean the sikhni's work visa expired ???.... can you reply and confirm this.
wow if thats the case , then there's the motive... issi liay tau cousin ke husband ko pataya hei usnay... the sikhni is just using your cousin's husband to immigrate to UK, and has no intentions of being a good muslim.. your cousin's husband is a stupid stupid stupid man, for falling in her trap, and actually thinking this sikhni loves him, and he loves her...
he will suffer for his stupidity
if its in UK try to scare your cousin's husband off, saying he is not legally allowed to have a second wife...if he doesn't hear, then your cousin can take legal action and tell the UK government about his crime (of marrying two women) the legal consequences will teach him a lesson!
Yes her visa expired she had to leave the country thats when they both confirmed there love to eachother and then he promised her my wife loves me alot and would agree and let me marry you and yes she did say to him that she will report him if he does go ahead with it, he took advantage of his wifes love to him that he thought she would really give him permission beacause she loves him and would never kick him out because they been married to each other for 13 years had problems which were sorted on the same day never had to separate or tell anyone about any problems they kept it between themselves thats why he thought she would keep it herself she made him to look at this thread and he seen how many replies came my cousin was so suprised and she is really gratefull to each and everyone of you because she is so madly in love with him that she was going to give him the permision but after reading all the replies she realised nobody agreed that he is in the right anyway like i said everything has calmed down now its been 2 days now he hasnt mentioned it again and now the ***** is in india and he knows he holds a pakistani passport he cant get a visa to go after her so he is trying to built his trust back with his wife and he seems upset after causing so much pain and you should see the state of his wife she stopped eating and was really depressed and now it will take time but she is getting better, thanx again to each and every one of you.
anyway like i said everything has calmed down now its been 2 days now he hasnt mentioned it again and now she is in india and ho knows he holds a pakistani passport he cant get a visa to go after her .
yep but do give my message to your cousin...
that the sikhni definitely definitely has some hidden motives... and your cousin needs to talk some sense into her husband head, even though things are calm. she need to tell him how the sikhni might be using him.
the sikhni knows that your cousin's husband is in UK, even though he has pakistan passport, he is currently in the UK .... the sikhni thinks he may be a useful link to somehow immigrate to UK or stay in UK for longer periods of time in future....
she is using your cousin's husband, for this reason alone. i am dead sure of it. the sikhni may not know about all the immigration rules, but she definitely sees some hope through yoru cousin's husband, in terms of her own future in the UK instead of india.
ok my last post in this thread, i promise.... i was reminded of some thing i studied in university
In Pakistan women are double in number then men .............. so ,Do you think they should live alone all their life ?
Actually Stylical, you are dead wrong in stating this, its actually the opposite in pakistan, india and china .... It is true In normal population world wide the number of women tend to be a littel higher than number of men (although its never double).... but in India , paksitan, and china, the number of women is much lower than the number you would expect to get based on worlwide population trend , and the population does not follow this normal expected trend of slightly more women than men, this is the case of "the missing women" ... and i am not making this up, i studied this in uni.... so go research it before u start to defend what you have stated.
the researchers tried to search why is this the case and why are these women missing...who should be statistially there in the population, and they have concluded that in pakistan, china and india, female infanticide is still practiced....
it was heavily practiced in china due to 1 child policy,
in india, and pakistan there is definite proof of abortions of female fetuses...ppl go to the doctor to get an ultrasound, find the gender of the fetus, and if its a baby girl, somehow cause an abortion, either assisted by some shady doctor, or privately at home, by harming the fetus physically. (I am not saying all people in pakistan, or most people in pakistan and india are doing this, but this is still going on at a very low but constant rate among jahil, less educated, and mostly poor segment of the population who are not literate, and are not well informed about true obligations of islam either).
so , pakistan has lower number of females in the population per number of males as compared to the worldwide population
yep but do give my message to your cousin...
that the sikhni definitely definitely has some hidden motives... and your cousin needs to talk some sense into her husband head, even though things are calm. she need to tell him how the sikhni might be using him.
the sikhni knows that your cousin's husband is in UK, even though he has pakistan passport, he is currently in the UK .... the sikhni thinks he may be a useful link to somehow immigrate to UK or stay in UK for longer periods of time in future....
she is using your cousin's husband, for this reason alone. i am dead sure of it. the sikhni may not know about all the immigration rules, but she definitely sees some hope through yoru cousin's husband, in terms of her own future in the UK instead of india.
My cousin had told him all this but he is so blind he doesnt want to hear anything negative about that *****, she thinks the reason why he told her is because she looks after his money from day one and if he did went she would know even though his saying he loves her and wouldnt hide anything i mean i still dont understand what kind of love he has for her have you ever heard anything like this before imean i know guys have affairs but then again maybe he knew he couldnt hide this.
ok my last post in this thread, i promise.... i was reminded of some thing i studied in university
Actually Stylical, you are dead wrong in stating this, its actually the opposite in pakistan, india and china .... It is true In normal population world wide the number of women tend to be a littel higher than number of men (although its never double)....
but in India , paksitan, and china, the number of women is much lower than the number you would expect to get based on worlwide population trend , and the population does not follow this normal expected trend of slightly more women than men, this is the case of "the missing women" ... and i am not making this up, i studied this in uni.... so go research it before u start to defend what you have stated.
the researchers tried to search why is this the case and why are these women missing...who should be statistially there in the population, and they have concluded that in pakistan, china and india, female infanticide is still practiced....
it was heavily practiced in china due to 1 child policy,
in india, and pakistan there is definite proof of abortions of female fetuses...ppl go to the doctor to get an ultrasound, find the gender of the fetus, and if its a baby girl, somehow cause an abortion, either assisted by some shady doctor, or privately at home, by harming the fetus physically. (I am not saying all people in pakistan, or most people in pakistan and india are doing this, but this is still going on at a very low but constant rate among jahil, less educated, and mostly poor segment of the population who are not literate, and are not well informed about true obligations of islam either).
so , pakistan has lower number of females in the population per number of males as compared to the worldwide population
Thank you for emphasizing the point I stated above. Cheers.
Sana... religion aside for a minute.. how can he love your cousin if he professes love for another woman. I dont believe that. If he was trully happy with wife number 1 then he wouldnt be feeling the need to have wife 2?? He sounds really pathetic actually andd sounds like someone who is jst using religion to get what he wants. And how would your cosuin feel watching him go to her bedroom. I could never share my husband and if ever he proposed such an ancient request on me.. then just before i left him.. i would propose the following.. he could take on another wife so long as i could take on another husband... if he is game so am i.
Your cousin should thnk of her kids and kids only. He hardly the best of a role model and send out all the wrong signals.
the husband loves his wife alot he says he wants them both and he has just fallen in love with that girl as they were working together and it had nothing to do with the wife wether she was good to him or not and he wasnt looking for someoneelse it just happened he says sex has nothing to do with it he just fell in love with her he has never touched her they talked only on the phone. The wife has told him that he is living in fantasy and she will kick him out of his life if he would go ahead with this marriage and this is so weird he wants them both to live together with him or get a separate house for her and give them equal rights as stated in islaam, he also says to his wife she would earn a good deed if she lets him go ahead with this because the other woman is a sikh and is ready to convert tro islaam.
^she's right, and you really don't want the kids growing up thinking that since dad did it, it's okay for them to do the same to their spouses later on. it leaves a very negative impact on the kids and really shatters the spirit.
Sana, tell your cousin that while islamically he is allowed to marry 4 wives, she is also allowed to get a divorce. See, after he marries the 2nd lady, anyway his time with his kids with the first wife will automatically become less, so it's better to get divorced and live separately. At least she will not have to go through the torment and humiliation of seeing her husband with another woman. After divorce, she will have no relationship with him so eventually with time, she will heal.
wow!!
firstly.....you said she is converting to Islam!! by breaking someone's home and being involved with a married man!! this doesnt sound right...does he really think this is the way to earn 'sawab'..
secondly...Allah has said "O Mankind! Fear your Lord Who created you from a single soul and from it created its mate.."
ONE!!..not two..three or four....!! multiple marriages are NOT encouraged in Islam...under dire circumstances...like war...and during times when Islam was spreading..and in many cases...women who converted to Islam were shunned by their families...Allah had encouraged his followers to take them into Nikah..for their protection....ONLY if they were able to treat them equally!...so Allah has placed a condition next to this possibility...then it also goes on to warn that you cannot. "You will never be able to be fair and just among women (wives)...." Qur’an (4:129)...because it is very difficult to be just/fair with them emotionally...financially etc...
It has nothing to do with pleasure...or whatever reasons men come up with NOW..
ok my last post in this thread, i promise.... i was reminded of some thing i studied in university
Actually Stylical, you are dead wrong in stating this, its actually the opposite in pakistan, india and china .... It is true In normal population world wide the number of women tend to be a littel higher than number of men (although its never double)....
but in India , paksitan, and china, the number of women is much lower than the number you would expect to get based on worlwide population trend , and the population does not follow this normal expected trend of slightly more women than men, this is the case of "the missing women" ... and i am not making this up, i studied this in uni.... so go research it before u start to defend what you have stated.
the researchers tried to search why is this the case and why are these women missing...who should be statistially there in the population, and they have concluded that in pakistan, china and india, female infanticide is still practiced....
it was heavily practiced in china due to 1 child policy,
in india, and pakistan there is definite proof of abortions of female fetuses...ppl go to the doctor to get an ultrasound, find the gender of the fetus, and if its a baby girl, somehow cause an abortion, either assisted by some shady doctor, or privately at home, by harming the fetus physically. (I am not saying all people in pakistan, or most people in pakistan and india are doing this, but this is still going on at a very low but constant rate** among jahil, less educated, and mostly poor segment of the population who are not literate, and are not well informed about true obligations of islam either**).
so , pakistan has lower number of females in the population per number of males as compared to the worldwide population
its actually the other way around..the educated jahil rich.. who can afford ultrasounds are the ones aborting the fetuses..unfortunately jahiliet is not confined to the poor..
for example.....the rich wives of the army officers who export 'entertainers' for the sheikhs and the wealthy businessmen....they are the ones 'running' majority of the local 'abortion clinics'...
More of the replies are emotionals, and 99% are true and thats how it should be, but in real life things are bit different which only person who is going through it can understand.
My advice will be, dont give up , dont give him permission fight for your right. If you give him permission he will not be able to manage you and her either so by doing it you all 3 will be in mess. So dont give up your space love is not to give up its some thing worth to fight for till end. If still he leaves you for some else, its just ur and his fate, but save him save ur love save ur 13 years of marriage by fighting for your right. dont hate him, he is just blind and dont know what he is doing i am sure he will realise once its over but you are not blind so be there for him help him by being with him by not letting him go to some one else. I think he is being used.
This is a tough situation but you know this is life "**** HAPPENS". Sometimes the bloke behaves like a dog and sometimes women behave like *****es. Who r we to judge? Only the Almighty can judge us and our actions. All we can do is try and better ourselves and not make the mistakes others make. The truth is how do u really know y some1 has done wat they have done. Ther are 2 sides to every story. I feel for the woman but i also believe if she is in the right her good days will come.