sometimes a bride end up smiling widely because of nervousness.
at my engagement party, I was nervous as hell because i hate being the center of attention in a gathering and that day i had to be. i was literally shaking . Well that is what i though until i saw my own video and realized why people were saying she couldnt stop smiling. I had wide open teeth smile during the whole coming to stage walk. it wasnt even a subtle smile but rather big grin....lol...but trust me...i was soooo nervous that day
^^ i recently saw a video on one of the vines pages where a bride dress in a red lengha does some breakdancing moves on the floor spinning and then does the splits.. Wow
I have pretty much been to the same weddings with lengthy speeches, mini movies dramatizing the couple's love story, choreographed dances that literally went on for two hours!!! Weddings are about mingling so let the guests mingle instead of constantly instructing them to sit down. It's not a classroom, someone stop the bully with the mic!!!
Totally guilty of encouraging family to have lengthy slideshows. My husband is the designated slideshow maker so it is something big in our family but its no more than 20 minutes and even that is TOOOOO long. I KNOW!!! It will STOP!!!!! After reading all this, I think maybe desis should start doing the rehearsal dinners for very close family friends. Share your slideshows, mini movies, dance off, and anything anyone to too close to you won't understand. All of these things truly matter to close family friends anyways so why not just make a party out of it and baaqi mehmaano ko bakhs do!!!
I think what irks most people is when the wedding becomes an OTT production and feels contrived.
Should a wedding have:
- speeches
- dancing
- music
- entrances
- pretty decorations
Sure it can - to each his/her own and what makes you happy. But I would suggest moderation and tastefulness and genuine celebration over a micro-managed and orchestrated wedding shudders
Agreed. Things aren't bad as long as they're done in moderation. Call me weird, but I like hearing speeches from the couple's parents; granted, I usually start getting teary-eyed and emotional but it's sweet. But it's probably best done either during dinner or after when most people have left. So that people that aren't interested can leave or eat their dinner and not pay attention
I apologise if my post came across as rather hostile! This was not my intention at all but I was busy with something else (decided to give making french macarons a try) and wrote it out rather quickly without rereading it. Lol. :D
The reason for my comment is that lately I’ve heard several comments regarding lavish weddings on here (not in this thread) that I found rather extremely negative and bordering on put downs. One would think that these individuals (the ones complaining) had a gun to their heads and were forced to attend these weddings, which I found a bit distasteful.
No one has made any comment of that nature in this thread but I guess I had that in mind since I read some of those prior to reading this thread.
No no, it's fine. I understand what you are saying. I've seen debates here where people militantly opposed the simple practice of bride wearing a basic yellow suit on her mehendi. So really, people will always find something to complain about, like we're doing here, lol. But I generally can't stand folks who attend every wedding they're invited to, merely as acquaintance, and they come back and gossip and talk about every negative from that wedding on every given opportunity. This is one of the main reasons I'll be having a strictly family and close friends' wedding. I may very well ask my groom to make an entrance on a white horse, accompanied by band baja crew with sehra on his head and a handkerchief in his hand, but the wedding will definitely be a very private family affair. We have enough Saima Chaudary type characters (a fictional character from a TV drama) in my family to provide raw fun and improvise 'entertainment on the spot'.
The show 'Four Weddings' on TLC has taught me that no matter what you do, whether big or small, segregated or non-segregated, simple or lavish, people will always find something to complain about. This thread confirms that. Best thing is to do whatever makes you comfortable and not care so much about what others think.
Attended a couple of weddings, where a 'halaqa' or 'dars' was given for one long hour. Ushers walking around holding signs that said 'Quiet please'. At one point a few guests stood up and complained very loudly. That did not end the talk that was being given.
The show 'Four Weddings' on TLC has taught me that no matter what you do, whether big or small, segregated or non-segregated, simple or lavish, people will always find something to complain about. This thread confirms that. Best thing is to do whatever makes you comfortable and not care so much about what others think.
Yes! That is what that show taught me as well. You will never please everyone as everyone has different tastes and ideas about what a wedding 'should' be. This is why couples should do what suits them, everything from wedding guests to the dress you wear!
I def. think joota chupaye is by far one of the worst rasm/tradition/display of negotiation skills I have ever seen. People get BORED and it goes on for ages and ages. And then you have this random aunty who makes some stupid comment, and offends the other side.. and then it goes on and on and on and on.
I def. think joota chupaye is by far one of the worst rasm/tradition/display of negotiation skills I have ever seen. People get BORED and it goes on for ages and ages. And then you have this random aunty who makes some stupid comment, and offends the other side.. and then it goes on and on and on and on.
See that's the thing, juta chupai, ungli pakarna, etc etc. All these things should be background events. All of your guests don't need to be waiting around for it to happen. But it can still happen.
See that's the thing, juta chupai, ungli pakarna, etc etc. All these things should be background events. All of your guests don't need to be waiting around for it to happen. But it can still happen.
Exactly! These things should take place during dinner or something so that all the guests are hijacked into sitting by idly while nothing makes sense to them
True. Although I feel some people are on the mission to find something to complain about. If it were left entirely up to me, I’d omit quite a few people from the guest list and I’d omit the speeches segment and keep it simple overall. Alas you cannot have it all your way cuz your dreams have to be merged with that of your family’s and the grooms; messy business.
That would make for an interesting thread: Whom would you omit from your wedding if you could?
This just clarified quite a bit for me. What people were talking about earlier about a “stage show” atmosphere makes much more sense now. In our culture, these type of things take place in the background while dinner is served and the guests watch it (or not) while they’re eating.
I wasn’t aware that these take center stage at Pakistani weddings BEFORE dinner is served. I can see why it would be irritating to wait around and have these go on and on. Earlier, I thought people were just complaining about too many ‘rasams.’ Makes sense now.
Everyone has their own choice... agreed; but now most of the weddings are trying to go too over the top in terms of décor, videography etc etc. Almost like a competition. No one is saying they should not do this or that ... just that they personally don't like it. So not sure what the big deal is ... for instance I am not a fan of makeup from Natasha Salon ... but my cousins are! I prefer Bina Khan type makeup. It comes down to personal choice, and that is all we are discussing in this thread - of course we will have our own pet peeves, just don't take it personally. In terms of the wedding entirety, I personally prefer a more subtle & classy / elegant look rather than neon/show-off look. At the end of the day, as long as the bride and groom (mainly bride, lets be honest) are happy with how their wedding turned out... that is all that matters.
