No communication until offical

Lifestyle Relationships
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41

Re: No communication until offical

There are conservative girls as well who may be ready for marriage but don't believe in communicating until the "official". But my concern is she seems the "quiet" type and you are not, Is this really a match?

42

Re: No communication until offical

you are right on this but i m just saying that okay when you both are agree for nikaah then your parents should ask for rishta. A boy should not ask it personally from girls parents, if you understand what I m trying to say

43

Re: No communication until offical

Oh on the contrary her Instagram would disagree with the whole "Quietness" wholeheartedly. She is by all means not the quiet one.

44

Re: No communication until offical

^ I think she is making you believe that she is a marriage material.

45

Re: No communication until offical

Sehrysh has given a very good idea, try that and if she keeps on with the excuses and does not reply to even one of your questions, do not waste your time anymore. Girls do tend you have a their walls up for guys, but is she has instagram and whatnot, she is not a reserved type.

Is she very pretty and are you losing your sleep over her? If so then take a risk and do some sort of engagement and then get to know her. Sadly this is how it works in most families..

46

Why don't you ask her what she means by "official"? To be honest, I would just move on.

47

Re: No communication until offical

Dude.

She. Is. Not. Into. You.

Stop forcing it and move on.

48

Re: No communication until offical

Interesting events unfolding.

49

Re: No communication until offical

What you mean by this? I really don't understand why the boy should not ask for rishta. What risk is there in that?

50

Re: No communication until offical

If the parents are alive then why they won't go to ask for rishta ??

51

Re: No communication until offical

It seems like she doesn't want to develop feelings for you unless YOU make this rishta official. It is possible that she was rejected/burnt in the past and now just being careful before she gives her heart out to anyone. She is just protecting herself. Absolutely nothing wrong with that. You like her enough, make it official.

52

Re: No communication until offical

There could be many reasons why the guy's parents aren't asking. Is there anything in Islam that forbids a guy to ask for girl's rishta?

You didn't answer Fitoor's question. What exactly is the problem with a guy asking for a girl's rishta?

53

Re: No communication until offical

That makes no sense at all. How is the OP supposed to know if she's a right fit him if she won't even talk? Wouldn't it be more embarrassing for both parties if they made things official, mangni or something, and things didn't work out after. The OP can't read minds so talking makes sense.

Paa Jee ye larki apko mamo bana rahi hay. Call it quits on this one and let her find some other lal-loo who'll play her games. You'll find someone else who is not as stuck up as her.

Now if you've fallen hard for her and don't wanna let her go then ask her if she wants you to back off. She might say, "No, that's not what I meant" or "What took you so long, I've been trying to hint at this for months."

54

Re: No communication until offical

For whatever reason, she seems more afraid of being rejected now than after their rishta being official. Yes, it will be embarrassing FOR her but at least he will get to know her. :faizy: see what I mean? What’s there to lose? And if fear of rejection really turns out to be the case then he will know she isn’t playing games and just protecting herself from getting hurt. People really need to stop being judgmental and give others a chance.

55

Re: No communication until offical

no there is no restriction , okay forgive me and go ask

56

Re: No communication until offical

Paa jee, as most of the posters commented she is just kahanian karaeng to you. See you need to understand how this whole thing works for girls. They run this whole guy-hunting thing as a camapaign. And they are always on multi-thread processing mode so you are just one thread among all. They'll keep on skimming the "prospects" and as soon as they see a microscopic wrong thing that doesnt suit them, you are out of their league and then comes the phase of "excuses" one of which she has just said to you. They use these excuses like the Ace-cards which in this case they dont only have four, rather all 52 are aces.

Does it hurt, yes but the quicker you suck it up, the better it is!

57

Re: No communication until offical

Any updates on the situation? Baat ageh barhi ya bach gaye paajee? :D

58

Re: No communication until offical

Paa Jee, If you are forced to move on and she is not interested, if she lives in the same city as you, how would you face her if you see her at a desi event?

I'm actually in a similar situation and I also don't know what the person is thinking but if they are making it such a mystery about their feelings, then most likely they are not interested. When someone is really interested whether it's a guy or a girl, they make some effort to show it either nonverbal or verbal.

Can you help me too please? How would you face her if you have to see her again after having your heart broken?

59

Re: No communication until offical

I've decided to call off the ristha. She didn't show any interest any reciprocation on her end. Of the4 months i've known her, i've only spoken to her on the phone 2 times. What sense would it make to marry someone whom you can't even talk to properly. Has no interest in you. Says "You can call me but 'not that much' ". I'm glad i've made the right decision. Mods please close the thread.

60

Re: No communication until offical

buri adat na dalo ;)

She is probably showing you her "sharif" side.