Sometimes I think it really takes the fun out to have a wedding in western countries because you have to limit your guest list.
It's pretty sad that the people you don't even know - that want to enjoy your wedding - who are not invited - cannot come - YET choose to come - and you don't want them there. I mean it's sad for both the bride and the uninvited guests.
(pun intended)
I don't find it fun to have people at my wedding who were not invited for a reason. When it comes to limited seating and catering, some guests are left out because importance is given to people who are family and closest to us. Then there are people who you know from a couple of gatherings but don't know too well to actually invite to a wedding event. And then there are also people who are left out because they are annoying, plain and simple- the ladies who gossip and create dramas, the ones who take pictures and email them as soon as they get home to the entire community, the ones who have a problem with everything at the wedding-from clothes to decor to food, and the ones who I personally can't stand and wouldn't even want to meet on a normal day, let alone my wedding. Sadly, I had atleast one aunty at my wedding from each of the above categories and everything I mentioned did happen.
Before my Nikkah was even done, I always planned for my rukhsati to be on a big scale with lots and lots of people. It's a happy occasion so the more the merrier. Familes, family friends, acquaintances- everyone should be invited. Based on that, we estimated to have atleast 500 people at the rukhsati. But after my experience with Nikkah, I realized my wedding is an extremely special occasion for me and my husband and we want to keep it personal and intimate with only people who we want there. We want amazing memories of the big day.. not why some aunty brought uninvited guests with her or why some aunty was gossiping about us, or why some aunty had an issue with my mom choosing to wear red on the day- none of that bs. Not everyone wants to share in your happiness, not everyone has good blessings for you in their heart. So many just show up to see the bride's clothes or how the couple looks or how the inlaws are or to eat the food. I saw all of this at my event and it pissed me off to think that these people were even invited.
That's why my rukhsati is iA gonna be very small and intimate affair with those who we are close to. Instead of wasting money per head on such useless people, I would rather spend it on something better like stuff for our new home or something.
SHAY9164 - I totally agree with you.! Your rukhsati should be special and before you leave you should be able to spend time with the people YOU love not have to worry about this aunty saying this and that snotty girl sneering... etcetc.
I ABSOLUTELY ABHOR going to weddings, sitting down and eating and having to hear FRIENDS of the bride's/grooms families gossip about "ooh look food is soo cold na" ... "ooh look at gulnaz, she's running after the groom family as if their masi" .. "ooh the jewellry is too tacky. not my taste" blah blah blah... SHUT UP ALREADY you cows!! Parents of both sides spend soo much money and take upon soo much stress making sure their guests are fed well and they do it within their means. And its just sad to sit and have to hear supposed friends saying this .
omg, the part that annoyed me the MOST was people who we're not even close to the family but were invited to the wedding were VIDEOTAPING my entire event! um, hello...you're not the official videographer are you so why do you need my husband to feed me cake again for you to capture on your ancient sony camcorder for you and your uninvited kids to watch and reminisce about?!?!
ughhh.
i had one auntie come up right in my face- literally i could see her pores and she wanted to take a "close up" shot of me. i put my hand in front of her camera and told her my professional photographer wasn't even allowed to come that close! she got kinda pissed and stepped off the stage. the nerve of people!!!
Nabz, at your video story.
I went to a wedding and this aunty came upto me and my sister and we had NO clue who she was. She wanted to take a picture of us and we were like wth? She goes, I want to get an outfit like that made for my niece… ummmmmmmmmm, okayyyyy. It was the most bizarre thing ever and as we started to walk away, she started clicking! I wanted to grab her camera and smash it to pieces.
After my wedding, I went to some event where almost every aunty (most of them I didn’t even KNOW) came upto me to say congrats and how they saw the pictures already. I was like ummm, first of all, I don’t know you, second, you weren’t even at my wedding.. soooo where did you see my pics? Turned out, this particular aunty who’s notorious for taking pictures and recording videos had sent them out in emails to the entire community She has no life at all. She’s one aunty who is definitely off my guest list for any future events.
Earlier she had recorded a friend of mine dancing at a wedding (zooming in onto her chest and all) and then showed it to other people to insult her because this loser aunty had a grudge against my friend’s mom. Soon word got around the community and the girl’s father went to her house and demanded all the tapes or else he threatened to call the cops. The entire state found out about this and so many people were stunned at this aunty’s disgusting mentality. Yeah I know, we have the oddest collection of aunties in this community.
lol, where are you from shay? i seriously think these aunties have some sort of keeray makoray in their thick fat heads! being from california (the melting pot- literally people from all gows and pinds and sheyrs), we also have an odd collection of aunties (and uncles) :P
i received one of my friend's wedding ivited it did said NO GIFTED BOXED PLEASE in bigger and bold bottom to grab our attention, i gave her £20 in a wedding card. but her relatives gave her the boxes while outsider people like no not allow to bring the boxes! weird
lol, where are you from shay? i seriously think these aunties have some sort of keeray makoray in their thick fat heads! being from california (the melting pot- literally people from all gows and pinds and sheyrs), we also have an odd collection of aunties (and uncles) :P
haha OMg shay that's sad... And hilarious LOL
Connecticut.
I swear, we have the kind of aunties who you would want to put in a box and roll down the hill.
omg, the part that annoyed me the MOST was people who we're not even close to the family but were invited to the wedding were VIDEOTAPING my entire event! um, hello...you're not the official videographer are you so why do you need my husband to feed me cake again for you to capture on your ancient sony camcorder for you and your uninvited kids to watch and reminisce about?!?!
ughhh.
i had one auntie come up right in my face- literally i could see her pores and she wanted to take a "close up" shot of me. i put my hand in front of her camera and told her my professional photographer wasn't even allowed to come that close! she got kinda pissed and stepped off the stage. the nerve of people!!!
^ ok seriously, this is the first time I have ever heard of such instances! people taking it upon themselves to spend ALL of their time at a wedding videotaping it? That is really really lame. And why would you want such a close up shot of the bride or groom? That's just so uncomfortable! Good that you put your hand in front of her camera and said NO! people are just so weird. I mean, if you are a guest, khushi khushi ao, give your congrats to those who should receive it, enjoy the food, entertainment etc and leave!
OMG the stories are horrifically funny!!! ppl are ao freaking stange dont know why
oh and btw about the no boxed gifts this wierdo i went to go to school with (we wernt friends or anything) but we ended up attended a wedding and since the card said "no boxed gifts" she showd up to the wedding w/o a gift and one of the grls asked how much are u giving the couple and she goes i didnt bring a gift bc the card said no gifts!! i was like no she didnt just say that!! it was the wierdest thing ever and guess who isnt on my guest list???.....u got it!!
i think its better to give money cos soo many times people end up with 2 toasters or whatever...iv heard some people give the guests a list of things to buy them and then u choose what ur going to buy them from the list...that way u dont get multiple presents of the same thing...but i think thats kinda sad to be honest..
and for the guest if u say no box gifts it means they dont have to worry about what to buy u..
talking about toasters....... a family friend's son got 20 toasters at his wedding. ............ lolzzz apparently they were at sale when he got married......... pata nahian what they did with that...... i forgot to ask her..... but i can't imagine what they would be going through while opening all those gift wraps and seeing same kind of toasterss........ that too 20!!!
Well,, why would you go to a wedding if ur not going to bring a gift? cheapness zindabad!
such people (the aunty who made pictures and videos and emailed to others ) need to learn some manners .
I have a uncle who’s like that .he goes around with his camera 24/7 and take pictures of brides and everyone else without premission , I dont know wht the hell he does with all pictures.
So it’s not only aunties but desi uncles are no less .
stupid people !
I'm horrified by all these creepy aunty and uncles with their videcams.
That people can sink so low...!
I'm very disguisted. These people should be put on place. If they start recording
someone elses wedding we should tell them to stop or leave the wedding. Same
thing for the creepy auntys recording girls dancing.
I am actually planning to write ‘NO CAMERAS OR VIDEOCAMERAS’ allowed at the wedding due to strict hotel policy (or something like that) on the invitation card. My friend has offered to go around and tell anyone with a camera to put it away.. except my close friends ofcourse. Hopefully we won’t even have ‘those’ kind of people invited to begin with.
At my mehndi, this aunty who’s best friends with my mom brought a camcorder and her daughter recorded part of my mehndi. I didn’t have a problem with that because I know that she’s not the type who would just go around showing stuff to people. This reminds me, I have to ask her for it so I can watch it
Shay I like the idea of NO CAMERA'S..... but i bet you'll see loads of aunties coming up to u to take a picture..
btw,if u'll really do it let us know how did it go...?
at your video story.
She has no life at all. She’s one aunty who is definitely off my guest list for any future events.
now one can’t say no to those, can they? 
