Gullible basically uneed to evaluate ur options.
Current situation: Noone talking to u not even the husband. N all dis is bothering u badly. There is one thing u shud learn in life. dont care about ppl who dont care about u. The kind of inlaws u have, them not talking to u isn't that important n disturbing, tho the air still stays thick wid tension, n no normal human likes it dat way. But if some1 is wrong n hurting dey r dat n dey should b avoided.
The most disturbing part is ur husband. His silence at the first stage, his shameless smile , and current behaviour.
Our pakistani men r the most weekest for wut ihave observed, there only mardangi pride is that v r physically stronger then men.
Allah has appointed man the head of the house. Why? So he maintains n peace n does justice to all.
Everyone including wife's rights are clearly defined.
No ur husband has acted way disgusting , going as far as asking u to apologize n not listening to ur explanation.
Gullible ur husband , inlaws , mil r not the end of ur life that their narazgi specially sils n mils , is torturing u so badly.
Many women survive successfully in joint fam sys due to supporting n listening to their wives woes. I dont means dils r never scheming .
No look at ur chances and future consequences
1) U apologize to all all simply n make up wid everyone.
drawback: u can expect similar apologies crossing ur way again, since despite not being at fault u gave in, jo dab gaya den he becomes victim.
But still future cud b diff
2) U try to explain things to ur husband. if he listens, n gets nicer to u, fine den dont care about inlaws, r make steady moves towards patch up. U have one husband only , ur inlaws r not ur husband. remember.
3) Reading in other threads about ur mil , explaining things to her, incase ur hus doesnt listen to u, also doesnt sound too positive, but ucan try, but i read u somewhere calling her cunning, she cud also misinterpret explanation from ur end n exploit more.
4) Calling in parental support. Specially if u have a strong baq.
In dis case many things can happens. mutual apologies from both ends cud happen. Or matters cud b worsened. Also parental support includes u moving baq to ur parents for sometime. Things not getting solved, inlaws acting stiff cud result in divorce.
5) Deciding whether u want to apologize or not. Not apologizing can result in what consequences , think over that n see if u will b ready for things in future. And what apologizing can bring.
How much u still love husband . Incase u break up, baby will stay wid whom.
Everyone has a diff way of problem solving. Jo bura karta hai one day reaps that.
The rule "i am always wrong" stated in some other thread is the most absurdest i eva read unless there is no way out NO WAY OUT. Fine somtimes such rules r effectual but like not always. Dekho apna haq fite karna parta hai . Dat is y m telling u , evaluate all extremes.
I c u as a weak person at the moment. U dont know how to take stand for urself. But time will teach u as u r going thru hard stuff.
I dont want to give u any specific advice , except for that u have to be patient. Cuz telling u outrite to apologize , like many ppl have done, makes me think, wud those ppl if in such situation will do the same???? I dont think they all will. U r bearing the pain u know how tuff it is. That is y iam telling u c wut u want.
As an aside: Kabhi kabhi life may bohat kuch u have to sacrifice , that includes ur ego too. By that idont mean u go and do it, and not exactly about ur circumstances , imean dis is life, dis is called TRIAL.
i basically agree with lots of ur things but this situation is different. it has gone very critical. one wrong move now can destroy everything.
by sayng"yea i'm always wrong n u r right" doesn't mean u r weak n always wrong. its just a way of shutting others up. to put a stop to an arguement right n there. this is wat it means.
a girl can b strong if atleast someone is on her side. in this household no one is supporting her.
if she cares for no one n let things be"koi baat nahi ker reha fine na keray. i don't care" they won't let her live like that. i'm sure they'll themselves call her family n ask them to take her away.
ye normal family nahi hai. ek tang kernay n strong networking wali family hai. being run by bunch of egoistic, silly ladies. u know y her husband behaves like this ?? becoz whole time we never once heard abt the Fil. he's alive but still doesn't exist in this whole drama.
So its the Fil. if Such fils/guys slap ther wives n daughter tight at right time their women don't go abt torturing other women. its the Fil that the husband is following. this is a house ruled by ladies n being destroyed by ladies. So only a lady with strong mind n clever ways can handle it.
just leaving them is no answer. they'll b fine. Gullible n her son will b at lost. aisay logon ko un k beech reh ker sabaq seekhana chahhiay. wat they say to break up a group first b a part of it. make them miserable by living within them.
I know my dialog was over-the-top. I was exaggerating, yaar. I wanted to write an apology that would also insult them, hehe.
