My poem

[STA]

Re: My poem

@muqawwee123

STA apni awaleen takhleeqat yun sar e aam rakh dena badi bahadur ka kaam hai. We should appreciate her. Great job Kinzz.

Tundi e baad e mukhalif se na ghabra ae uqaab
ye to chalti hai tujhe ooncha uRane ka liye

@Kinzz

Hahahahahhahaha

STA abhi batati hoo

@Kinzz

Jealous log

ilzam. ham unka hosla buland kar rhay hain aur hamain hi shaki nigahon say dekha jaraha hai.

[Kinzz]

Re: My poem

Aaiye aaiye, STA ko apka hi intzar tha,

Itna axha tou nahi likha

Apke nishan-dahi karne ka shukriya ,

Aainda likhne Mai help mile gi

@Khalil KhaaN FaaKhta

waah…kia baat hai…ibtidaa e shaa’irii bhii nahiiN hai, maashaa Allah kaafii kuchh likh chukii ho…aise hii likhtii raho iA kaamiyaab rahogii!

Allah kare zor e qalam aur ziyaada!

Ek chhoTaa saa point hai:

yeh ne “maHfil-e-guftugu” likhaa hai aur jiskaa matlab tum ne “maHfil kii cheh-e-mee-goiyaaN” liyaa hai magar Faarsii kii izaafat [connectivity] kii roo se ise “guftuguu-e-meHfil” honaa chaahiye kiuN k jahaN izaafat 'alaamat “-e-”] hotii hai vahaN ek se zaayad alfaaz hoN to use ulaT kar [backwards] paRhte haiN…

maHfil-e-guftuguu = guftuguu kii maHfil
guftuguu-e-meHfil = maHfil kii guftuguu

[Kinzz]

Re: My poem

@STA

ilzam. ham unka hosla buland kar rhay hain aur hamain hi shaki nigahon say dekha jaraha hai.

First page pe ghalti nikali..
2nd page tak Sab ne tareef Ki to phir app housle buland kar Rahey they

[STA]

Re: My poem

@Kinzz

First page pe ghalti nikali..
2nd page tak Sab ne tareef Ki to phir app housle buland kar Rahey they

first page sirf yeh kaha tha kay hum ki jagah tum kardo. baqi sab thek hia.

[Kinzz]

Re: My poem

Yeh version app Apne naaam se Shaiya kar den,

@queen_24

Hum kbhi Mehfil-e-guftugu na hotay
tum jo gr arzu-e-dil na hotay

socha kabhi kiya mangte dua main hum
tum jo gr dil me basay na hotay

aalam-e-zabat ke zuban p quful!!
kash ishara-e-nzr tum parh chuky hotay!!

now thats the version I corrected for you!! dono main difference dekh lo I could make it more clear but i wanted to keep your matter there!!

good luck for your future, You have skills though :k:

[STA]

Re: My poem

acha ab ham aainda appko ko kabhi nahi batain gay kay sher ka wazan kahan par toot raha hai. khush

[ninja_hattori]

Re: My poem

Yeh version app Apne naaam se Shaiya kar den,

Apki poem ki to autopsy kardi GS ke adeebo ne..............:D

BTW i liked it...........:) but my knowledge of shayari is limited

[Kinzz]

Re: My poem

I start writing poetry when I was 16, I was inspired by the great Urdu poets.

And I dont even think I'm writing a poetry or Could ever be a poet,

Just bas kab dil Kia likh dia,

Sometimes when I'm in depression,I write much better,but that's only for me and I wouldnt share it with anyone else,scared of being judgeD,lol

[ninja_hattori]

Re: My poem

I start writing poetry when I was 16, I was inspired by the great Urdu poets.

And I dont even think I'm writing a poetry or Could ever be a poet,

Just bas kab dil Kia likha dia,

Sometimes when I'm in depression,I write much better,but that's only for me and I wouldnt share it with someone,scared of being judgeD,lol

poetry is art of expressions ....isn't it ?

i so want to write some poem but i cann't.....

if i was able to write like you..i will be more than happy......

[muqawwee123]

Re: My poem

I start writing poetry when I was 16, I was inspired by the great Urdu poets.

And I dont even think I'm writing a poetry or Could ever be a poet,

Just bas kab dil Kia likh dia,

Sometimes when I'm in depression,I write much better,but that's only for me and I wouldnt share it with anyone else,scared of being judgeD,lol

hence proved duniya ke baRe baRe poets depression ka shikar hote hain :)

[Kinzz]

Re: My poem

^ lol..who said??

I thought Ishq ka shikaar houtay hain.

[queen_24]

Re: My poem

ishq, mohabbat, ana, bewafai, judai, hijr, tanhai, depression, complex, dhoka, fareb, theis, dard, dukh, insab main say kisi ka YAA insab ka jisne maza chkkha ho, wo banta hay shaair!! aur jo iske ilawa ban jaye, to usay huruf-e-aam main kehte hain, Talent!! :D

[Kinzz]

Re: My poem

Dhokha?? Dhokhe Mai qalam Ki jaga hath Mai kuch aur houna chahye ,

Takay phir wo Banda kisi ko dhokha na de sake :p

[ehsan]

Re: My poem

I start writing poetry when I was 16, I was inspired by the great Urdu poets.

And I dont even think I'm writing a poetry or Could ever be a poet,

Just bas kab dil Kia likh dia,

Sometimes when I'm in depression,I write much better,but that's only for me and I wouldnt share it with anyone else,scared of being judgeD,lol

Just keep writing, you certainly have the talent. ignore STA. :D

[Kinzz]

Re: My poem

acha ab ham aainda appko ko kabhi nahi batain gay kay sher ka wazan kahan par toot raha hai. khush

Phir mAi aainda poetry hi nahi Karoo gi :(

[Kinzz]

Re: My poem

Just keep writing, you certainly have the talent. ignore STA. :D

Lol koi bat nahi..Nukta-cheeni ke bina koi agahy kese
Bhar sake ga??
Aghay bharne ke liye sirf tareef nahi kabhi kabhi Nukta-cheeni Ki zaroorat bhi parhti hai.:p

[muqawwee123]

Re: My poem

^ lol..who said??

I thought Ishq ka shikaar houtay hain.

Ishq ka shikar ya bivi ke satae huwe? chale uncle ehsan ke liye ek sawal yaad aaya

[queen_24]

Re: My poem

@Kinzz

Dhokha?? Dhokhe Mai qalam Ki jaga hath Mai kuch aur houna chahye ,

Takay phir wo Banda kisi ko dhokha na de sake

Mohabbat main dhooka khanay walo se poocho… Q STA??

[Kinzz]

Re: My poem

^ STA se kyu?

[Kinzz]

Re: My poem

@muqawwee123

Ishq ka shikar ya bivi ke satae huwe? chale uncle ehsan ke liye ek sawal yaad aaya

phir tou yeh sawal muje karna chahiye tha