Re: more randomness from the mother IN LAW.,
Peace nadz123
Here is some honest advice …
When MIL says “no one asks about me” … Pat her on the back and say … “Alhumdulillah … You are built like an ox … But I care for you, that is why I live with you … Isn’t it?”
Umm … May be not 
… But it would be fun right … At least to think that way in your own head …
Re: more randomness from the mother IN LAW.,
is it just me or is the MIL just an older version of nadz?
Re: more randomness from the mother IN LAW.,
Queer and his third eye.....such uncanny foresight. Beware, OP.
Re: more randomness from the mother IN LAW.,
Nadz,
She is who she is...I don't know what you're expecting here.
Change?
Realization that she is being unjust and unfair to you?
Fall at your feet an apologize for all her dramaybaazi?
What do you want to do about this?
Re: more randomness from the mother IN LAW.,
Nadz,
What do you want to do about this?
She wants to do nothing but gloss over the advice given and whine, vent, and harp some more until the cows.....or ox .....as Psyah put it.....comes home. It's called trolling.
Re: more randomness from the mother IN LAW.,
well guess what.
today she sent hubbs a text message, a long one, all drama, how me and him are always naraaz with her, we dont talk to her, didnt anyone tell him she had a massive attack of some sort the other day how ill she is et cetc ......( she didnthave any attack it was her stomach, she takes some tablets steriods, and they give her bad heartburn, but she calls it an attack fine, but it made it all so ever dramamtic to him), and she took 2 aspirins that dat and was fine 5mins later. anyhowshe made a big fuss how ill she still is and we are careless.shes always using my name in messages sent to him. if she has a issue with me, talk to me...
anyway all i said to husband was, whenever i sent u a long guilt-inducing sms you told me i was just doingdrama` and how he doesnt like bollywood style drama in his life.
so i asked him the sms his mum just sent wasnt drama??
Re: more randomness from the mother IN LAW.,
is it just me or is the MIL just an older version of nadz?
I am only like this on GS.
Re: more randomness from the mother IN LAW.,
Nadzz grow up yaar. You sound like a spoilt teenager. Use some tact and the advice others have left on here.
Re: more randomness from the mother IN LAW.,
the iftar was deicded ages ago, not spur of the moment so people can eat the cake.
the cake is still in freezer. she saw me take out a slice myself yay and eat it. she said nothing. however today she sms my husband and saiys we wanted to cut the cake with you two but im so sill that etc etc.cut cake with us? whatever. she told me to give the cake to the servants. i cut myself aslice and she sat there and didnt even say oh we wanted to celebrate, cut cake etc. its all bull.
shes also sending her daughters texts messages, how naraaz and odd i am…and no point in doing any celebrations for us cos im like this. if she thinks in khafa from her, ask me. why is she telling everyone about me. and my attitude. listen guys, im like this on gs, i vent- here, i do -niot show this side to the real people in my life.
Re: more randomness from the mother IN LAW.,
QFT :k:
Re: more randomness from the mother IN LAW.,
Nadzz grow up yaar. You sound like a spoilt teenager. Use some tact and the advice others have left on here.
possibly.
tact? say what.
Re: more randomness from the mother IN LAW.,
well guess what.
today she sent hubbs a text message, a long one, all drama, how me and him are always naraaz with her, we dont talk to her, didnt anyone tell him she had a massive attack of some sort the other day how ill she is et cetc ......( she didnthave any attack it was her stomach, she takes some tablets steriods, and they give her bad heartburn, but she calls it an attack fine, but it made it all so ever dramamtic to him), and she took 2 aspirins that dat and was fine 5mins later. anyhowshe made a big fuss how ill she still is and we are careless.shes always using my name in messages sent to him. if she has a issue with me, talk to me...
anyway all i said to husband was, whenever i sent u a long guilt-inducing sms you told me i was just doingdrama` and how he doesnt like bollywood style drama in his life.
so i asked him the sms his mum just sent wasnt drama??
He cant talk with his mother in same manner as he talks with you.....
And how do you know so much details about your MIL's condition while you do not want to ask about her illness?
Re: more randomness from the mother IN LAW.,
be more tactful. All in-laws are the same, it's how u deal with them.
Re: more randomness from the mother IN LAW.,
be more tactful. All in-laws are the same, it's how u deal with them.
ok. so what shall i say. and some of the responses here are not something i can say. we dont have that kind of relationship.
Re: more randomness from the mother IN LAW.,
ok. so what shall i say. and some of the responses here are not something i can say. we dont have that kind of relationship.
Dnt antagonise her, don't be disrespectful, even if u don't like her, pretend that you do.
And do ask her how she is doing once in a while. Believe me their health all some old women like to talk about.
Don't bother too much about your sis in law but try to get some sort of decent relationship with your MIL. you did agree to marry her son, she can't be all bad. (I hope)
Re: more randomness from the mother IN LAW.,
well guess what.
today she sent hubbs a text message, a long one, all drama, how me and him are always naraaz with her, we dont talk to her, didnt anyone tell him she had a massive attack of some sort the other day how ill she is et cetc ......( she didnthave any attack it was her stomach, she takes some tablets steriods, and they give her bad heartburn, but she calls it an attack fine, but it made it all so ever dramamtic to him), and she took 2 aspirins that dat and was fine 5mins later. anyhowshe made a big fuss how ill she still is and we are careless.shes always using my name in messages sent to him. if she has a issue with me, talk to me...
anyway all i said to husband was, whenever i sent u a long guilt-inducing sms you told me i was just doingdrama` and how he doesnt like bollywood style drama in his life.
so i asked him the sms his mum just sent wasnt drama??
Here a sincere piece of advise for you. Human in general (and husbands/wife in particular) do not like to listen words "drama" "dramay baz" "acting" "fake" "making big fuss" etc for their parents (specially mother) from SO. Even if you are right, your choice of words is not. Words used in conversation/discussion are as important as the context its-self.
Secondly, if your MIL is feeling (rightly or wrongly) that your husband does not care about her, its your husband's DUTY to make her feel better/secure just like its his duty to make you feel secure.
and Finally, he can say things to you that he can not say to his mom because dynamics of both relationships are different. I am sure you can say things to him that you can say to your father. Cant you?
Re: more randomness from the mother IN LAW.,
Seems to me that just as you are insecure about her feelings about you, she is insecure about your feelings about her. So no matter what happens, both of you assume the worst intentions about the other.
Do you think she is otherwise a good/nice person? If so, make efforts to establish a connection with her that is not defined by your inlaw relationship and one that does not involve your husband. Hopefully with time you will be able to grow closer and more confident in each others' affection. There will still be disagreements and conflict, but those will be minor if you are dedicated and devoted to being part of a single family and being respectful and caring for each other.
Re: more randomness from the mother IN LAW.,
why can't you just tune her out? Have you never done that before to people? Just ignore what they're saying and go off into your own head to think about whatever you want and subconsciously not your head and throw in some yes' and no's
Re: more randomness from the mother IN LAW.,
shes also sending her daughters texts messages, how naraaz and odd i am.....and no point in doing any celebrations for us cos im like this. if she thinks in khafa from her, ask me. why is she telling everyone about me. and my attitude. listen guys, im like this on gs, i vent- here, i do -niot show this side to the real people in my life.
she sends sms messages to all and sundry while you are right there in the house......what does that tell you? the fact that you two don't communicate is not her fault alone. we never get to read about your efforts to bridge the obvious gap that you and your MIL share. all we read about are her transgressions and nastiness. don't you agree that you are equally at fault if not more?
you seem to have the whole "two-faced" routine down pat. why is there even a need for you to behave like a a hypocrite? this is your home....you should be able to be yourself and not put on a show. I would advise that you start working on taking walls down and establishing genuine relationships with the inlaws so that you can be yourself......
Re: more randomness from the mother IN LAW.,
The question is, who is telling you about these text messages. Okay, I do get the hubby once, but those sent to her daughter?