Re: Marriage in Jeopardy, need advice!
I think fault lies with you as much as your family, plus I also think you are living in your own created illusive world. Love in marriage is important, but whatever you mentioned as reasons for divorce are trivial reasons.
Throughout world, there are two popular marriage method, one is engaged marriage and other is so-called love marriage (as most of the time love marriage is actually getting caught in relationship due to lust, that one thinks is love). No way one can say that, engage marriages are better or love marriages, but statistics show that engaged marriages are more lasting and successful than love marriages.
Anyhow, if your problem with your wife had developed after marriage and that would have been the reason for you to decide divorce, than there was a valid excuse, but what you want to do, that is not a valid excuse socially, morally or in Islam.
If you did not wanted to marry the girl than you should have shown courage before marriage and told your family that you are not yet prepared to get married, instead of getting married, ruining or effecting her future life, and now deciding that you want to come out of the contract of marriage you went into for reasons that did not developed after marriage but was there even at the time you got into it, and you also knew that problem.
As for love and relationship before marriage, argument for and against is there. All is how you look at things.
Regardless, you cannot say that if you get into relationship with someone before marriage and develop love, than that relationship and love would not become sour after marriage that can lead to divorce. Actually, in most cases, such love and relationship that got developed before marriage, ends after few months of marriage, especially after birth of first child. In western countries, most marriages happen after developing relationship and love before marriage, still most marriages ends in divorce. On the other hand, arranged marriage starts without any love for each other, but love develops with time, or if not love than certainly care or feelings for each other do develops in most cases over time.
It is accepted fact that arranged marriages (where bride and groom do not even know each other before marriage) are normally more successful, especially if family know each other and no sinister motive other than marriage is there. One reason for success is low expectations of one on other, and most of the time (if not all the time), people find partner above expectation, as both try to compromise with each other. Another reason is, such marriages is not between two humans but between two families, and thus have network of people connected, so if any problem in marriage develops, that happens more often than one can think of, than there are people to rely upon and get support.
In the end, it is your life, so you decide. But whatever you decide, do pondering, as wrong decision could make you regret later.
