Re: Love n life
The guy isn't even in a relationship with the other woman how can he know if he loves her, her doesn't know any of the two.
Re: Love n life
Very Well Said, but easy said then done. Those in love, want to keep hanging on to it, as long as there's some hope. Dil hai keh manta naheen ..... ;)
Re: Love n life
Hmmm. So should those balls be organic?
Re: Love n life
:hinna:
Re: Love n life
and you were talking about love 
When you love someoen wherever they are you still love them :~)
Re: Love n life
this story sounds all too familiar:aq:
He has now committed himself to this girl (his fiance). I think once someone does that it is wrong to get out of it unless the feelings are completely mutual. In our culture when a girls engagement is broken off it is badnami for her (as stupid as it sounds) even if it wasnt any fault of her own. If she is a nice girl then he should just be a man and do what he promised her…marry her. Afterall arranged marriages sometimes work out even better then love marriages.
With that said…i think the guy should bring some closure with the girl he likes/loves…talk to her before he gets married.
Re: Love n life
You are talking about emotions ----someone's feelings here.
How can you be with someone who you dont love?
Its a lie!
Sometimes love develops over time...just like in any relationship. you didnt love the guy you are married to immediately did u? so what makes an arranged marriage any different...aside from the fact that you are already married.
Re: Love n life
i was going to say the same thing.....he shouldnt leave his fiance (if that is what he plans on doing) until he knows for sure what the other girl thinks about all this. does she even want a relationship with him....you didnt mention how his beloved felt about him?
Re: Love n life
Angel Eyes, would you want to be with a man if he doesn't love you? Although the girl doesn't know it yet, he may resent her in the long run. What if she finds out that he doesn't really want to be with her and longs for someone else? It's hard for love to grow when you are in love with someone else.
For once, I actually agree with skhan. Both girls are better off without him.
Re: Love n life
the guy still seems like a little boy who needs to grow up.
1 ) if he was already engaged...before falling in love with this girl, couldnt he control his feelings and try not to feel this way.....if after marriage he sees a girl and "falls in love" will he leave his wife for her?
2) if he was in love before getting engaged couldnt he just be man enough to tell his parents.....if hes going to be a coward....then he shouldnt have loved....cuz love isnt easy
Re: Love n life
For once, I actually agree with skhan. Both girls are better off without him.
The reality is that there is not guarantee that a marriage will work ...love marriage or not. Marriage is a gamble. You can easily fall in love with a person that you had an arranged marriage with just as quickly as you can fall out of love with a person you had a love marriage with (hope that made sense).
I do think that he should talk to the girl he loves and see where things stand b/w them or at least bring some closure before he makes a decision of any sort.
Re: Love n life
1 ) if he was already engaged...before falling in love with this girl, couldnt he control his feelings and try not to feel this way.....if after marriage he sees a girl and "falls in love" will he leave his wife for her?
2) if he was in love before getting engaged couldnt he just be man enough to tell his parents.....if hes going to be a coward....then he shouldnt have loved....cuz love isnt easy
easier said then done....sometimes you have no control over who and when you fall in love.
Re: Love n life
I do think that he should talk to the girl he loves and see where things stand b/w them or at least bring some closure before he makes a decision of any sort.
Dang it, you don't sound like a bollywood fan at all. What's wrong with you! :D
Re: Love n life
and you love it! :D
Re: Love n life
lame excuse to ruin someone elses life.
Re: Love n life
I do think that he should talk to the girl he loves and see where things stand b/w them or at least bring some closure before he makes a decision of any sort.
not as far as true love is considered!
when in true love people get comitted to each other without any need for papers/contracts and papers/contracts change nothing about their infinite commitment
ouside of true love, there is atraction, lust, pleasant feeling and affections btw people of opposite gender, in that case, the most reasonable should be done: going with the girl who would be most affected by the break up:
either the beloved, if there is a strong link btw her and the guy
either the fiancee, if she loves the guy enough to forgive him, his unfaithfull heart
Re: Love n life
[QUOTE]
not as far as true love is considered!
[/QUOTE]
You and many bachi's of life1 need to understand that there is nothing called "true love" as a phenomenon.
Its all about people, some people cannot commit themselves, some do not have resolve to honour the commitment. Its not that a person just discovers a 'true love' and then settles down.
Re: Love n life
I do think that he should talk to the girl he loves and see where things stand b/w them or at least bring some closure before he makes a decision of any sort.
Yes marriage is a gamble, either love marriage or arranged marriage. Yet going into a marriage knowing your feelings are for someone else is a mistake and incredibly unfair to everybody involved. Would you be happy with a man knowing he was in love with someone else and didn't really want to marry you? Answer it honestly. There is no guarantee that even 5 years later the guy will miraculously be in love with you especially if he's thinking of someone else. It's irresponsible and cowardly behaviour. You see people in our desi community having affairs all the time. When you ask them why they do it, the common answer is that they were forced into a marriage they did not want to be in, or they were in love with someone else but were forced by parents to marry their spouse.
He doesn't even know if the woman he really wants even wants him after he went and got engaged to someone else. If he was so unsure, why did he even get involved with his fiance in the first place? Commitment and marriage is not a joke.
Re: Love n life
^I agree with both Mehnaz N Angel eyes. Why, let me explain.
First of all, yes it is very much likely that the guy might resent his fiancee through no fault of hers. It did happen in my uncle's case, it took him a long long time to overcome his first love and get on well with his wife. Around 5 years to be precise. Did the wife stay, yes, was she happy, no.
However, All too often, I have seen people who get into arranged marriages, discover a new life and dismiss their relationships before marriage as Bachpana. Those relatiopnships hold no meaning for them after they get married. Perhaps its because of the social conditioning , but its very common in our society and a major reason why most of us don't know the true meaning of a relationship is (go out with desis at your own peril). I have seen many cousins, friends both girls and guys who before getting married confessed to me that they would die without their beloved, and after getting married just laughed it off. Infact, I can quote examples of very close relatives but then again I wouldn't do it here coz some people just get personal rather then being objective.
So, it works bothways. Depends on how headstrong a person is.