Saudi Arabia has one of the highest divorce rates in the word so the ‘love marriages are more likely to end in divorce’ thing that us desis love to spout is actually a myth..
**‘The number of divorces is increasing in the kingdom, with nearly 62 percent of marriages ending in divorce.’
…waiting for 500 ‘references’ from 'news websites…
I agree with what TLK said…its not necessary…but the ones with Love marrriage (if not subsequently ratified by the familes) will have a tougher time because the support systems of the families isn’t there…
its all fine and fancy to say ‘make yourself the decision, be responsible for wht you did, sort it out yourself’…if people were that mature they wouldn’t have such problems in the first place..
the fact is…people do act immature…and if the families are not involved…expectancy of divorce rises.
one of my uncle had a love marriage , thts the only love marriage we had in our family , successful so far so good , in 8 years of marriage tht couple had 2 kids and so far 1 of the happiest couple in our family , So my vote goes to love marriage :k:
Is the base line assumption here that love marriages and Saudi Arabia are mutually exclusive? Is it really so? Do we have research to confirm this?
Either way, this report is irrelevant to the topic at hand.
**There is plenty of research out there showing the vast majority of marriages in KSA are arranged (and over half are to cousins), **go and google it if u want the complete stats..
I was refuting the previous poster's 'fact' (ie his own opinion) so it's hardly irrelevant: 'Divorces in 'love marriages' are greater than those in 'arranged marriages'. Fact.'
Rising divorce rates tend to have more to do with the acceptance of divorce in that particular society and the the absence of the stigma attached to divorcees (Arabs tend not to have a problem with marrying divorced women), women being able to actually afford to leave the marriage, having somewhere to go and/or being more educated.. It's more to do with those things than the marriage simply being love or arranged, the situation in Saudi Arabia shows that..
Before posting that link did you happen to realise that in the Khaleeji culture its the guys who pick out the girls rather than a strictly arranged marriage? I’m guessing not or you wouldn’t have tried to correlate the divorce rate in Saudi Arabia with arranged marriages.
And an arranged marriage lasting has nothing to do with being rich or poor. Its just how it is. I will admit that in Desi culture in particular a divorce brings stigma although that is definitely changing.
There is plenty of research out there showing the vast majority of marriages in KSA are arranged (and over half are to cousins), go and google it if u want the complete stats..
I was refuting the previous poster's 'fact' (ie his own opinion) so it's hardly irrelevant:
'Divorces in 'love marriages' are greater than those in 'arranged marriages'. Fact.'
Rising divorce rates tend to have more to do with the acceptance of divorce in that particular society and the the absence of the stigma attached to divorcees (Arabs tend not to have a problem with marrying divorced women), women becoming more financially independent and/or educated.. It's more to do with those things than the marriage simply being love or arranged, the situation in Saudi Arabia shows that..
Haha by googling that Arabian Business article about 62% of marriages failing, you somehow reached the conclusion that those 62% were arranged marriages?
You've got a long way to go before debating statistics.
^How exactly??? Please stop **trying to pretend ur own opinion is fact.. **
Still no references from u to back up ur so-called ‘fact’ lol
'Divorces are rising at an alarming rate in Saudi Arabia. It has the second highest rate of divorces in the world.
**The marriage court registers 40 marriages and 20 divorces a day. According to a study conducted by Dr. Ebtisam Halawani at King Abdul Aziz University, main reasons for women, leaving their spouses was ill-treatment and violence. **
Polygamy was responsible for up to 55% of divorces while involvement of husbands in illicit affairs accounted for 38% of divorces. It shows that not allowing one to know the person who one is going to marry does not guarantee conjugal bliss.’
Divorce rates are lower for arranged marriages than love marriages. That is irrefutable fact Deeba. I'm not saying every arranged marriage lasts or every love marriage fails. I'm talking purely statistics. I'm not talking about the causes in particular but there's a direct correlation to cultures with strong arranged marriage traditions and lower divorce rates. Google that one up, maybe Arabian Business will have something to say about that.
P.S. You forgot the part where I said in Arab culture, marriages aren't the sort of arranged that you're thinking of. So your argument about majority are arranged and dropping the 62% in there is just flawed. Simple as.
I'm well-aware how arranged-marriages work in KSA, sometimes the guys pick girls they might have seen somewhere but more often the family (esp the mothers and sisters check her out) but either way they have** little to no interaction before marriage** the same way desis traditionally do.. It's interesting u don't class those as 'arranged marriages' when everyone else seems to (BBC, The Times, Wikipedia, even the Arabs themselves)..
'Divorces are rising at an alarming rate in Saudi Arabia. It has the second highest rate of divorces in the world. The marriage court registers 40 marriages and 20 divorces a day. According to a study conducted by Dr. Ebtisam Halawani at King Abdul Aziz University, main reasons for women, leaving their spouses was ill-treatment and violence. Polygamy was responsible for up to 55% of divorces while involvement of husbands in illicit affairs accounted for 38% of divorces. It shows that not allowing one to know the person who one is going to marry does not guarantee conjugal bliss.' Source: Times Online
And what is your little edit supposed to provide towards this particular debate? Saudi Arabia does not have the same concept of arranged marriages as the Desi culture. Yeah, how does ill-treatment and violence come into this? Are you correlating domestic abuse with arranged marriages? Because if you are then I don't think you'll see any sense in my posts (Not that you are already). How does polygamy come into this? How does illicit affairs come into this? I don't see why the introduction of those statistics has to do with arranged/love marriages? Are you saying love marriages are immune to abuse/polygamy/cheating? Correct answer would be No, for your own sake.
^Still no references, nothing but own opinion.. I'm well-aware how arranged-marriages work in KSA, sometimes the guys pick girls they might have seen somewhere but more often the family (esp the mothers and sisters check her out) but either way they have little to no interaction before marriage the same way desis traditionally do.. It's interesting u don't class those as 'arranged marriages' when everyone else seems to (BBC, The Times, Wikipedia, even the Arabs themselves)..
Yeah I've pretty much spent my whole life in the GCC so I'm inclined to say I know a wee bit more than you about Khaleeji culture. Again, your definition of arranged and their definition of arranged is different. You're trying to call it a guy seeing a girl and picking her out as a partner and taking the proposal as opposed to parents picking out someone and just approving them. Not the same.
dude.....u need to pay some attention to my posts.....here it is again....i hope you get it
Tell me about it mate...
Better to have 500 references than trying to present ur own opinion as fact
Meh this is probably the tenth time I'm using this damned word. Correlation! Correlation! Correlation!
Education is a huge player in divorces within the desi culture. I think people have a hard time finding the middle between their cultural norms and what we learn about humanity in a classroom.
In a classroom we learn that we have freedom, rights, and no one should stand in our way of succeeding.
But through our families we learn that marriage works with sacrifice and patience.
So which path do you take? If you choose to take one single path, for example following culture, then your marriage will not be successful (even if it doesn’t end in divorce, but there is unhappiness, as history shows).If you choose to make your marriage work solely on what you learned with education, then you’re going to be alone.
The reason more love marriages fall for divorce is because there is too much ME and not US. Both partners become selfish when their OWN dreams are no fulfilled. Now just because less arranged marriages fall into divorce, that DOES NOT mean overall they’re more successful. It just means those who opt for arranged marriages are willing to make more sacrifices, while “losing” themselves. Is that success? I would argue no.
I think those marriages which are successful today, may it be love of arranged, have found the middle between culture and education. Islam has made it so easy by giving everyone rights and their own responsibilities, but WE make it so much harder. NO ONE should have to “lose” themselves while making a marriage work.
Education is a huge player in divorces within the desi culture. I think people have a hard time finding the middle between their cultural norms and what we learn about humanity in a classroom.
In a classroom we learn that we have freedom, rights, and no one should stand in our way of succeeding.
But through our families we learn that marriage works with sacrifice and patience.
So which path do you take? If you choose to take one single path, for example following culture, then your marriage will not be successful (even if it doesn’t end in divorce, but there is unhappiness, as history shows).If you choose to make your marriage work solely on what you learned with education, then you’re going to be alone.
The reason more love marriages fall for divorce is because there is too much ME and not US. Both partners become selfish when their OWN dreams are no fulfilled. Now just because less arranged marriages fall into divorce, that DOES NOT mean overall they’re more successful. It just means those who opt for arranged marriages are willing to make more sacrifices, while “losing” themselves. Is that success? I would argue no.
I think those marriages which are successful today, may it be love of arranged, have found the middle between culture and education. Islam has made it so easy by giving everyone rights and their own responsibilities, but WE make it so much harder. NO ONE should have to “lose” themselves while making a marriage work.
…waiting for 500 ‘references’ from 'news websites…