Re: Long Phone Calls with parents…
Umbilical cord needs to be cut 
Re: Long Phone Calls with parents....
D6C , yr wife is smarter , she trick u in making dinner whenever she want , phone call isn't a problem here
i talk to my mom on average one-1 1/2 hr every week ( sometimes more like may be 3 hrs)
Re: Long Phone Calls with parents....
I can't stand being on the phone for long periods of time. I used to be on the phone while doing work during high school.
I have relatives though that are on the phone with each other for hours on end. Most are mothers and home-makers, and they talk as they work. It's too much for me, but as long as they're taking care of their responsibilities, what's the problem?
Re: Long Phone Calls with parents....
I usually talk to my mom every other day, for about 4-5 minutes just to ask how she's doing and how everything is. With dad it's once a week or so. With siblings, it's once or a month or so. Beat that!
Re: Long Phone Calls with parents....
Some people are VERY attached to their parents, and it's a good thing. I find alot to talk about with my aunt who Im very close to because she lives in Pak and obviously isn't around to see what's going on in my life and vice versa. So whenever I call her, we talk for atleast 3 hours minimum. This is your wife's mother so obviously she's gonna talk to her about everything too.
This is specially for the guppies who are living aboard, are married and have parents (and immediate relatives) in Pakistan. How often you talk to your parents and specially for HOW LONG? If you talk for a long time, what is your Spouse's reaction? or if your spouse talks for long, whats your reaction? do you talk this with your spouse? When I say LONG TALKS that mean 3,4,5 hours phone calls with parents almost every 4/5 days.
For some reason I am unable to make my wife understand that its too much :) . Her response is always "aab main ammi ko choor tu nahee saktee...aab itnee door tu hoon, kia un saai baat bhee na karoon?" She is quite sensitive when it comes to her mother (not so much with it comes to father and others though). Anything said by me on this topic always blown up into argument and I have to make dinner that day as per our own rules :)
PS: $$ are not of concern here as I** have an unlimited call in Plan from Pakistan**.
This is your problem!
Re: Long Phone Calls with parents....
Could it be that you're a bit jealous? I know it sounds silly, but I find that when people get married, they feel their spouse becomes 'property' to a certain degree too. As such, one spouse can feel jealous if he/she talks for long periods with a close friend/relative while other spouse is around. I think you need to examine your insecurities, since this is something making you upset. I'm not trying to blame you, I've noticed it on occasion in my marriage too. There's a possessive aspect that comes into play, and it has to be handled properly, otherwise it can lead to a lot of resentment. And finally, don't come between wife and her mom; she'll never ever EVER let you forget it if you accidentally say something stupid. (No, I haven't made that mistake, because I already KNOW hubby dearest holds a grudge foreverrrrr).
Re: Long Phone Calls with parents…
What would be more productive is that you guys also say what long-distance plan you’re using. Atleast kisi aur ka faidah tao hojayega is discussion se :halo:
Re: Long Phone Calls with parents....
dude ...communicate with ur wife... ask her to lower the call time down... coz 3/4 hrs is like....waaaayyy too much! wat do they even talk about?
i say jus talk to her ...and if she blows it out of prptn then jus say u will discuss this matter no matter wat the situation...i really dislike it wen ppl jus start to argue and defend their selves ...when theres no need for it.. so jus sit her down...wen u get time to ur selves and bring it up...and explain why u dnt like it...:)
and haimerali...thts some really crap advice bro gotta say! tht is like poisoning ones marriage :|
I talk to my mom everyday for about 30 minutes and that includes my sister we do three way calling.But since they both are in Canada so its just general discussion nothing more.kheriat hi maloom kerni hoti hai and my hub calls his parents on weekends but its not more than 40-55 minutes.
Re: Long Phone Calls with parents....
Change your call plan.
yaar i dont think its a huge problem if your spouse is talking to his/her parents for long hours specially women living abroad away from parents, c`mon ek mother kee best friend hotee hai uss kee betee, they have tons of things to talk about from recipes to totkay to taareefein to gheebatein, let women be women, as long as she fulfills her duties towards a husband and the conversations are not causing damage to married life i dont think there should be and issue, baaqi Allah jaaney.
Re: Long Phone Calls with parents....
My mom and in laws live in the same state as me but yet I find me and my husband talking to them at least twice a day!
Re: Long Phone Calls with parents....
i find it weird that these ppl are saying she should cut down her talk time......this reminds me of another thread where someone pointed out the double standard, wife shouldn't be too attached to her parents but its always opposite for son and his mother.......
umm D6, ur just wondering right? not complaining i hope.... its really hard for me to even guage how much i talk to my parents, we can go a few weeks with 5-minute calls every other day, or 30-60 minute calls once or twice a week..
Re: Long Phone Calls with parents....
I guess we need to know a few things to understand the message:
1) Are you guys newly married? i.e. Did she just move away from her parents?
2) Is she the only daughter/child?
3) Is she neglecting you or any house work while talking to her parents?
I had one more question but I forgot what I was going to ask.
I guess we need to know a few things to understand the message:
1) Are you guys newly married? i.e. Did she just move away from her parents? 2) Is she the only daughter/child? 3) Is she neglecting you or any house work while talking to her parents?
I had one more question but I forgot what I was going to ask.
the last question would be
R U REALLY THAT INSECURE ?:D
I guess we need to know a few things to understand the message:
1) Are you guys newly married? i.e. Did she just move away from her parents? 2) Is she the only daughter/child? 3) Is she neglecting you or any house work while talking to her parents?
I had one more question but I forgot what I was going to ask.
1) no we are purana chawal. 8 years :)
2) nah they are 5 siblings in all
3) sometimes kids get ignored and more than that if she talks to her mom late night (which she normally does upto 2/3 am), she puts stress on herself.
BTW, let me clear it once more time. I dont have any particular problem with her talking to her MOM. I have mom too and she is in Pakistan too. So i have been there done that! It just came to my mind to check what do other peoples are into ....
the last question would be
R U REALLY THAT INSECURE ?:D
yaar aab MIL sai kia insecurity unhoon nai tu khud jaan chiree hai mujh sai shadi ker k apni BAY-TEE kee ;)
Re: Long Phone Calls with parents....
I am not married or anything but I am away from home and I talk with my mom quite a few times during the eveining. These days she is in Pak and I haven't been able to talk much with her and that makes me an unhappy camper. I am not going to count how many hours my future husband spends on ph with his mom and I don't want him to count my hours either...Yes, there should be a balance but I am going to talk with my mom everyday and I am not going to like if he tries to stop me.
Re: Long Phone Calls with parents....
Since you said that everyone is busy during thje week, I am guessing your wife makes these long calls on the weeekend and since such a long chunk of time is devoted to the calls, you feel neglected. If that is the case I do understand where you are coming from. But if she doesn't work (your wife) then she can easily find a time to call during the week when your Mil is not busy. If your wife works then, can she call for an hour each day (Friday and Saturday)? That would make sense.
This is specially for the guppies who are living aboard, are married and have parents (and immediate relatives) in Pakistan. How often you talk to your parents and specially for HOW LONG? If you talk for a long time, what is your Spouse's reaction? or if your spouse talks for long, whats your reaction? do you talk this with your spouse? When I say LONG TALKS that mean 3,4,5 hours phone calls with parents almost every 4/5 days.
For some reason I am unable to make my wife understand that its too much :) . Her response is always "aab main ammi ko choor tu nahee saktee...aab itnee door tu hoon, kia un saai baat bhee na karoon?" She is quite sensitive when it comes to her mother (not so much with it comes to father and others though). Anything said by me on this topic always blown up into argument and I have to make dinner that day as per our own rules :)
PS: $$ are not of concern here as I have an unlimited call in Plan from Pakistan.
bat karny do jitna marzi,,, karny do ek din thak kah khud he bas kar dy g,, if not like than plan band kar do wo baz aa jy g,,, waisy iss main koi harj nahin wo maan sy he bat karti hai koi bf sy to nahin na,,,,,, kon sa plan hai muj ko bhi batao na main bhi bat karoon,,,, mera husband khud muj ko fone mila kah dety kah jitna marzi aay bat kaRO PK,,,, BUT MERI MOTHER NAHIN HAIN allah jannat nasib kary