I’ve met a man and we seem to both like each other, get on, everything just feels so comfortable alhumdulillah. We’ve both been doing istikharas, I’ve done 3, did the 3rd one last night and he’s done 2 (2nd one last night).
I’m not sure what I should be looking for - I really like him, and I’ve had no weird feelings against him, or dreams, so I’m not sure what conclusion to take from it. He say the same, that he hasn’t had any clear indication either.
I’m planning to do 4 more.
Can anyone share any experiences they may have had? The marriage ones please. Like if you did one before you married your husband, what made you go ahead with it? And also the opposite too.
I'm a bit perplexed about these istikharas that everyone chats about when considering rishtay.
Since you've opened up this thread, can I ask a few personal questions?
Prior to doing these 3 istikharas, did you have a regular routine of salat?
If yes, how old were you when you started to pray five times a day and how old are you now?
From what I know; once you do the istikara either the issue at hand gets easier for you or becomes more difficult.
I don't know for sure that you'll dream something or there will be a big red stop sign.
Sounds like you feel good about the situation; go for it.
Good luck.
Awwwwww! Mashallah! An istikhara is the prayer of guidance and that guidance can come from anywhere- existing feeling getting stronger/weaker, random comments from that may sway you away/towards the situation and dreams that may show you signs/make you feel like the situation is good/bad for you. Ultimately, by making this prayer, you are humbling yourself to the mercy of Allah SWT and asking for his guidance.
The fact that you've done several istikharas as has he and you still feel okay is a good sign, inshallah. I did one and am content with how I feel alhamdulillah. The rest is up to Allah SWT anyway. It may be that an istikhara for marriage is good and the couple marry but that doesn't work out- even that's good because it was meant to be and teach the couple something.
I'd say do bismillah, get your elders involved, if it makes you feel better, ask them to do one on your behalf (in case your feelings are influencing you) and go ahead with it by having your belief in Allah SWT. He truly works in mysterious ways :)
Mashallah, I know I'm getting carried away but I'm happy for you and everything you're experiencing so far :)
As for istikharahs that go the opposite way- I've had several! I really like a man and he said he liked me too. We did our istikharah and an issue cropped up that neither of us were willing to compromise over. Another istikharah made me determined that I should definitely not compromise as he was being unreasonable. We went our separate ways. Another one I did, revealed that the man had a genetic condition that he hadn't talked about but his cousin (my friend) randomly mentioned to me! Another one I did about a rishta was fine until I was on FB and saw a picture crop up of this man with an alcoholic drink in his hand!
I have always been saved by istikharay. You should do them in all matters you're not sure of, not just marriage.
Awwwwww! Mashallah! An istikhara is the prayer of guidance and that guidance can come from anywhere- existing feeling getting stronger/weaker, random comments from that may sway you away/towards the situation and dreams that may show you signs/make you feel like the situation is good/bad for you. Ultimately, by making this prayer, you are humbling yourself to the mercy of Allah SWT and asking for his guidance.
The fact that you've done several istikharas as has he and you still feel okay is a good sign, inshallah. I did one and am content with how I feel alhamdulillah. The rest is up to Allah SWT anyway. It may be that an istikhara for marriage is good and the couple marry but that doesn't work out- even that's good because it was meant to be and teach the couple something.
I'd say do bismillah, get your elders involved, if it makes you feel better, ask them to do one on your behalf (in case your feelings are influencing you) and go ahead with it by having your belief in Allah SWT. He truly works in mysterious ways :)
Mashallah, I know I'm getting carried away but I'm happy for you and everything you're experiencing so far :)
Thank you so much, I have a good feeling about this alhumdulillah, but you're right my feelings may be biased so I might ask my dad to do it.
I've waited a long time for this, so just feeling a bit hesitant about it being "too good to be true", hence the istikhara.
I'm a bit perplexed about these istikharas that everyone chats about when considering rishtay.
Since you've opened up this thread, can I ask a few personal questions?
Prior to doing these 3 istikharas, did you have a regular routine of salat?
If yes, how old were you when you started to pray five times a day and how old are you now?
Muzna ji, are you trying to equate faith with expression of faith?
"tie your camel then trust God to protect your camel"
it's true in other cases as well. in your case:
"do your home work then seek guidance/blessings through IstiKhaara"
remember one thing:
**
istiKhaara is NOT a litmus test to help you make a 'RIGHT' decision. instead, istiKhaara is asking Allah for His "Blessings" in whatever decision you make [after doing your home work].**
i've seen people doing istiKhaara REPEATEDLY until they get a POSITIVE feeling about it.
one last thing:
as Muzna saaHiba indicated, you [NOT you in particular] just can't be living a life of a non-practicing Muslim and all of a sudden one fine morning you wake up in the morning and start doing istiKhaaraa because everyone else is doing it...it doesn't work that way.
you have to keep Allah pleased with you before you can even start expecting a favour from Him...it's ONLY fair!
Istikhara is asking goodness(khair) from Allah, a dua from the sunnah of Muhammad sallal laho alehe wasallam, pray two nafal n make dua e istikhara, now whatever will happen inshaAllah will be good for you, and it does, one should have faith whether your desire is fulfilled or not ,after making dua you have to have firm belief it is indeed for your good!!
In addition just have advice of someone knowledgeable & experiance elders or olders,but mashwara is also a part of deen. So together with istikhara advice will help us to make decision right!
just can't be living a life of a non-practicing Muslim and all of a sudden one fine morning you wake up in the morning and start doing istiKhaaraa because everyone else is doing it...it doesn't work that way.
you have to keep Allah pleased with you before you can even start expecting a favour from Him...it's ONLY fair!
I have to ask, what is your definition of practicing muslim?
sorry, but can we keep this to my questions on istikhara - whether I read 1 namaz or 5 is my own thing and it is up to Allah to give me guidance if He wishes.
sorry, but can we keep this to my questions on istikhara - whether I read 1 namaz or 5 is my own thing and it is up to Allah to give me guidance if He wishes.
I just wanted to know what experiences others had
And when My servants ask you, [O Muhammad], concerning Me - indeed I am near. I respond to the invocation of the supplicant when he calls upon Me. So let them respond to Me [by obedience] and believe in Me that they may be [rightly] guided.[2:186]
Allah will inshaAllah respond you, you are asking Him only, Allah loves His servent, may Allah guide all of us Ameen
I know some people say you see a dream or something alike after an istikhara and if it's a good dream, for instance if you see milk or gold in your dream, it means you should carry on. However, my own opinion is Istikhara is a dua for guidance, it doesn't mean you HAVE to see a dream. You are asking Allah swt to guide you and He swt can do that in many ways, like I know someone who did it in regards to a rishta, everything was fine but suddenly everything started to fall apart. I hope that made sense. Just do the Istikhara, as someone said, it's sunnah to do it for 7 days and then leave it to Allah swt. Don't stress if you don't see a good/bad dream or other clear signs.
My heart is at ease knowing that what was meant for me will never miss me, and that what misses me was never meant for me..
sorry, but can we keep this to my questions on istikhara - whether I read 1 namaz or 5 is my own thing and it is up to Allah to give me guidance if He wishes.
I just wanted to know what experiences others had
Allah ta'ala looks at what is in you heart, not how many farayez you fulfilled ( at least not yet ). If istikhara is positive you should move forward, keeping in mind, that whatever you will face in future is also from Allah ta'ala.
That said, if I were in your place, I would have done mushawra first.
So per your logic, until a person observes all 5 pillars of islam, he/she should not indulge in any kind of ibadat or dua, coz we know for sure Allah ta'ala is not pleased?
More fundamental than the five pillars is the faith. Hope is a big part of faith; a momin is always hopeful. He will be pleased with us out of His mercy, and not for what we did. That is the hope we hold.
( @aliyahali sorry about the detour; my last post )
So until you do Hajj (remember it’s in the 5 pillars na?) You shouldn’t ask Allah swt for anything because until then you’re not practicing?
Re-posting from Tahurra’s reply:
And when My servants ask you, [O Muhammad], concerning Me - indeed I am near. I respond to the invocation of the supplicant when he calls upon Me. So let them respond to Me [by obedience] and believe in Me that they may be [rightly] guided.[2:186]
He swt clearly said He responds to the invocation of a **supplicant **- meaning jo pochey ga, not who is the most practicing Muslim. Not saying that you shouldn’t fulfill your farz, but the supplication from a sincere heart is worth much more than you would think.
