Re: Is this necessary
what i don't like is when some girls who are young/immature suddenly start acting like the boss of everyone once they are married. acting like they are more knowledgeable about life now that they have had sex, or think they can boss their older sil's around just because they are married to their older brother. this kind of aggressiveness and fake maturity really get on my nerves.
as for the rest of it. well, i was how i wanted to be before marriage and am the same now in terms of personality and how i dress/act etc. i do get comments but i'm like, 'if i wanted to dress like that, i would have done it before'. i think it's because our society largely doesn't except people as adults until they are married and then you have to outwardly show it. whereas it's very different in my immediate family, as long as we're in the bounds of what's acceptable, we make our own choices. for example, i would ask my dad for advice but i decided where i would study, what i would study, where i worked, how i'd spend my money...
it helps that i'm very far away from my in-laws. so far they haven't interfered much (huge difference from when i'm staying with them, that would drive me crazy if it was permanent), hopefully it will continue that way when my husband is with me permanently. i would find it hard to handle if we had to have their permission at every decision and if i had my mil lecturing me all the time over the phone.