Is this necessary

Lifestyle Relationships
21

tumharee jaise ager 2-3 aur hoon tu batana, i have younger brothers :D

22

Re: Is this necessary

These two things - maturity/agressiveness/seriousness and jewelry wearing - are very different issues.

Jewelry-wearing is like take it or leave it. Completely a personal/fashion choice.

Maturity, seriousness and aggressivesness are necessary. More especially once you have children. People see a weak person and will walk all over you. You cannot be a nice person because that says to others "please come take advantage of me". Sad but true.

23

Tab D awsum thread. ure newly married so these things mst b irritatin i can understand :D anyway i also HATE, with all my heart the xpectations that paki ppl have of a married woman. so wot if i m married??? i hate wearin gold.. i look sooooo amma in it and its sooo not hot! i cant match it with my clothes... plus i automatically feel old!! another thing i hate just becus i m married i cant wear jeans or tops... makes me feel like a prisoner really. ppl cannot imagine a married woman wearin jeans let alone a mother. but i plan to change that! i m preggo 5 months almost near end and i still wear jeans. to hell with the world. y shud i stop dressin nicely and stylishly cus i m preggo? but trust me i know i m treadin on the wrong path, m sure ppl esp my ILS must b appalled at my dressin :D i m proud i m able to still fit into nice jeans and wear nice tops without displayin my bump which is a little big now but not that obvious.
i also dun understand the need for us to b mature and all.. y cant i b funny, fun lovin and all? sure marriage is responsibility and that shud b taken seriously but other than that, y cant i dance, make jokes and have fun?? it feels like marriage means suddenly u need to act all aunty, dress like an aunt and feel like an aunt!!

24

lol.. :omg:

25

i never try to wear gold after my wedding day. i seriously hate this. mai kabhi achi ne lagi gold pahn k. after the wedding day my gold is locked in a cubbord. :D

26

Re: Is this necessary

When I was newly married I used to listen to all type of cra* from aunties like once a woman said "you don't wear gold because you don't want to look married", I mean what the heck!

I hated gold then and I still do.

27

Re: Is this necessary

what i don't like is when some girls who are young/immature suddenly start acting like the boss of everyone once they are married. acting like they are more knowledgeable about life now that they have had sex, or think they can boss their older sil's around just because they are married to their older brother. this kind of aggressiveness and fake maturity really get on my nerves.

as for the rest of it. well, i was how i wanted to be before marriage and am the same now in terms of personality and how i dress/act etc. i do get comments but i'm like, 'if i wanted to dress like that, i would have done it before'. i think it's because our society largely doesn't except people as adults until they are married and then you have to outwardly show it. whereas it's very different in my immediate family, as long as we're in the bounds of what's acceptable, we make our own choices. for example, i would ask my dad for advice but i decided where i would study, what i would study, where i worked, how i'd spend my money...
it helps that i'm very far away from my in-laws. so far they haven't interfered much (huge difference from when i'm staying with them, that would drive me crazy if it was permanent), hopefully it will continue that way when my husband is with me permanently. i would find it hard to handle if we had to have their permission at every decision and if i had my mil lecturing me all the time over the phone.

28

Re: Is this necessary

well if you want your husband and inlaws to take you seriously and respect your decisions then better act smart and be more serious your self first. It's not a rocket science, just a common sense.

29

Re: Is this necessary

its good to be aggressive whether your are married or single. otherwise men/women start getting false hopes from you.

30

u know wot??? i wud have answered her back.. jee bilkul sahi kaha kon shadi shuda amma dikhna chata hia. MA i m still young!!! gosh, i hate these women!! honestly this is also one of the reasons i dun wear gold cus yeah i dun wanna look old!! as it is i look a bit too old for my age and then if i wear gold imagine!!

31

Re: Is this necessary

yes and yes. doh

A girl with a past?
32

Re: Is this necessary

i still get the comments from my mil, mil's mom n even my own mom k kuch pehanti nahi...
i'm not fond of gold either but Tab since u r newly married u can opt for delicate diamond earings/pendant n a single bangle or even white gold looks decent. a lil bit really doesn't hurt but personally i'm like u.

Past Stuff
33

first of all congrats ! :D
secondly i completely agree with you! im currently in the process of making my trousseau, and the input from the elders is most unwanted coz all they can think of is to fill EVERYTHING WITH EMBROIDERY and MORE EMBROIDERY!!! :| yuckk!! i mean how long can i go around looking like a bride??? plus i hate heavy jewellry too! tbh i LOVE the big artificial earrings that you can buy in every colour for all occasions, why does it have to be gold sets like ammas and daadis :( with two dozen gold bangles, and a heavy set on the neck! thats horrrible!
Also, im 100% with you on the jeans and tshirt. we may be newly weds, but doesnt mean we should choose pendu over practical!...

34

congrts for wot? my out of this world thots on post marriage dressing :D hehe its one thing being NEWLY married.. i m not new anymore :P hehe i m gonna finish 3 yrs IA since i m married. like u my mom MIL keep sayin ke gold nahi pehanti.. my MIL has hardly seen me 2 times each year but says whenever she sees me ke mein ne tumhe gold mein nahi dekha.. which is true but its ridiculous she will point it out... helloooo u dun live here. sigh... cud b those photos that isent her wearin jeans and nice tops with matchin shoes and earrings and handbags or those shalwar kameez with artificial earrings :D i cant even imagine her expression these days seein my fotos when i m preg... gosh she mst b fainting seein me still adamant on wearin jeans and look stylish at that!! plus she mst b wonderin y on earth am i not showin enuff not to wear these clothes.. hehe :D one of my aunts even said to me this eid when iwas wearin shalwar kameez... tumhara toh bilkul pait nahi nikla or something like that.. and immediately i said auntyyyyy nazar toh na lagaye.. bht mehnat karni padti hai.. :D hahahaha mehnat my ass!! i m broad and thaz y i m not showin. ppl were like y did u say that theyll think ure dietin while being preg.. then i was like sheesh they are rite thaz the impression i mite have given.. when infact im eatin so normal nothing extra in preg.. and MA MA i have gained only 3-4 kgs so far!! i m a prouddddddddd momma to b Mashallah :)

35

i used this on parties or weddings.but i felt so much uncomfortable in routine life. if you saw me in real life you can understand better :D

36

Re: Is this necessary

yes all the girls must act like aunties:)

When a pious person died they make a place of worship at his grave
When a pious person died they make a place of worship at his grave
When a pious person died they make a place of worship at his grave
37

what if aunties start behaving like a young girls :D

38

and many aunties do act like young happening girls....and make fun of themselves:|

Is this true?
39

may be thy did not accept yet they are aunties :D

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